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Show 11 piP I VlraS f(f Li I j "''I j"""-r -J Fun to Stay Home: A drive in the country has its perils. per-ils. The parade of sappy billboards is bound to affect your nervous system. sys-tem. And there is always a lunkhead lunk-head on the road, who will send you to the nearest hospital babbling that he had the right of way. Nothing can top a home-cooked meal. The cuisine in swanky spots is usually tangy, but a glance at the steep fees for food is bound to give anyone not on the columnist "cuff" indigestion. Locking paws with a cutie-pie or patting her knees under a cafe table ta-ble is a popular form of recreation. Yet the privacy of the home provides pro-vides the coziest atmosphere for cu-pididoes. cu-pididoes. Besides, you can be arrested ar-rested for playing Post Office in public. There Is plenty of danger in night clubs. The air is usually foul, the music is brassy and the emcees' inept cavorting .is invariably pitiful. piti-ful. Making goo-goo eyes at the doll across the room is more perilous than smoking hop. She might have a boy-friend who packs a wallop like Joe Louis. Or what is worse she might know a good lawyer. Traveling has many advantages but the scenery is never as compelling com-pelling as it appears in travelogues. All you are certain to acquire while romping around the globe Is an acute case of homesickness. Strolling In the street isn't all it's cracked up to be. Mendicants clutter clut-ter every block, and you risk running run-ning into bores you're trying to duck. Then there are the sadistic motorists motor-ists who have declared war on every ev-ery pedestrian. The politicos have tipped their mitt for 1946. . . . It's going to be reckless racism pitting the Poles versus the Russians the Irish versus ver-sus the British, etcetera. . . . Cutting Cut-ting up Europe's quarrels to fan up ballots is what too many office-seekers office-seekers try to peddle as "Americanism." "Amer-icanism." As the lady in "State of the Union" observes : "I thought the Poles voted in Poland!" Faces In the Dimout: Judge Ferdinand Fer-dinand Pecora, Bernard Gimbel, John Gunther and reporters trying to decipher the Mayor's closing proclamation to Sherman Billings-ley Billings-ley at the Stork Club. "All I know," 1 said the famed host, "is that this is the first time I ever got hit by an atomic bomb!" . . . Keenan Wynn, just in from Movietown, getting caught In a 59th St. spot's free-for- all. . . . Jane Wyman and her groom, Ronald Reagan, impressing local yocals with their pleasantries. . . . John Steinbeck, the book-writer, trying out his Spanish on the : Havana-Madrid crowd. . . , Lovely Alexis Smith elbowing her way through the Radio City signatour-ists. signatour-ists. . . . The Joe Cottens at the Carnival, a gay spot. . . Augustin Ducan, who attracted sugary notices no-tices for his performance as the blind parent in "Lute Song." He is blind. Sallies In Our Alley: Peter Donald Don-ald (he was among the recent White House entertainers) told it at the Singapore last night. Margaret O'Brien, the moppet, asked the President: "Was the White House like this when America was born?" . . . "No," said the President. "In those days they didn't have rich young ladies such as you to pay taxes." ... At Sardi's, Mrs. John . Wildberg remarked: "Money is worthless today." . . . "Unless," said her producer groom, "you have none." . . . Buddy Lester says that with the shirt shortage It is amazing amaz-ing how many people are still willing will-ing to risk losing theirs in Wall St. Manhattan Murals: The swan in Central Park, which accepts food only from males refuses to come near the gals. . . . The lingerie shop on 5th, which calls its very daring dar-ing negligees: "indiscreations." . . . The Lincoln, the only hotel In town . that plnys Negro orchestras. . . . The Embassy's powder room attendant at-tendant who owns a 24-room mansion man-sion uptown. 1 The Funnies: Lincoln was rest- - ing in a hotel lobby after a campaign speech when some of the villagers gathered there. One remarked: "Mr. Lincoln, your speech was good, but there were some points quite beyond my reach." . . . Abe chuckled: "I'm sorry for you; I once had a dog that had the same trouble with fleas!" Quotation Marksmanship: E. Howe: Make a woman mad and she is no more polite than a man. . . . Vincent Shcean: Churchill's personality is like an army with banners; your first impulse is to get out of its way. , . . M. B. Gree-ble: Gree-ble: Beautiful young people are accidents ac-cidents of nature. But beautiful old people are works of art. . . . N. Coward: Cow-ard: It's surprising how many are shocked by honesty and so few by deceit. . . . Alf D. Runyon: The nearest thing to perpetual motion is a mother with a child. |