Show Kathleen Norris Says Wild i Oats for for or Daughters Dan s Bell Syndicate Features Feature it c IF I- I 11 F l y 0 vJ a At t 6 Z c Th 1 I 1 Lou Deny was teas not yet fourteen when she came home to breakfast one morning morning morn morn- ing bedraggled and exhausted hating danced all night at th the country club and various carious night clubs By KATHLEEN NORRIS T T USED to be the boys IT I who sowed the wild oats and the girls who stayed home writes a heartbroken mother from a suburb near Tol Toledo do But in these days it seems to be the other way My boys now 24 and 20 both bothin in the services have been the comfort and pride of my life Their sister now 16 has given her father and me infinite cause for anxiety and is now in real trouble We live in a college town Lou Betty-Lou was not fourteen when she came in to breakfast one morning bedraggled and exhausted having danced all aU night at the country country country coun coun- try club and various night clubs She had been drinking and was in a condition condition condition con con- to horr horrify y anyone who loved her Only her ber father and I were home and we did what we could We reminded her after she had had coffee a bath and some hours of sleep that tha t hers is a comfortable hospitable home that we have always al ale always ways tried to give her every advantage advantage advantage tage and that our hopes for her had been bitterly shaken by her be be- havior I was obliged to tell her that hereafter when she told me she wanted to stay with a school friend I would telephone that friend to check on the matter matler But both Joe Joeand Joeand Joeand and I regarded this as the recklessness reckless reckless- ness of a defiant Child thUd and while we watched her carefully we did not take this first outbreak too seriously Now I know that it was by no means an isolated instance That Christmas we took all aU the children east to my mothers mother's place and there was a dance among the cousins to which I permitted BettyLou BettyLou Betty Betty- Lou to go she had bad her first formal evening dress and was much petted and praised At the end of ot the evening evening evening eve eve- ning she and a boy of 21 disappeared disappeared disappeared next morning after a night of horror for us they were found at ata ata ata a Baltimore hotel the boy asleep ina in ina a chair in the lobby Lou Betty and another girl a girl they had picked up at nt some night club asleep ep up up- stairs Expelled From School When we came back we tried school boarding but last November in her third term half there she was quietly dropped for repeatedly breaking breaking breaking break break- ing bounds and disappearing for hours houts at a time This time Christmas time her behavior behavior behavior be be- havior was so reckless that night after night her father and I lay awake waiting to hear her return from various entertainments sometimes sometimes some somo- times at two or three o'clock and sometimes in a state that showed us she had been drinking Threats are areno areno areno no use we cannot seem to reach her soul or heart at all Yet ours is isa isa isa a good goad home and we have always tried to keep about her decent and developing Influences Last night a young marine 20 years old called on my husband and me and said that he was willing wilting willingto to marry our daughter If we wished it Lou Betty was at a movie with some young friends we could only gather from rom this young mans man's talk that he felt obliged to make this suggestion When Lou Betty came in she denied everything said that the boy was romancing and that she wouldn't marry him under any circumstances But his serious apologetic manner made a terrible impression on both Joe and myself Now what are we to do Here lIere is this girl not yet 17 who knows neither law nor affection who is as ashard ashard ashard hard as n flint nt and who is going to go co coher her own way no matter what wha t we do IN III V VAIN AIN REGRET The grief grief- stricken grief stricken mother who folio writes this letter is faced with an alarming problem Her young daughter who has had all the advantages o of f a good home and devoted parents has grown wild unreasonable and headstrong Without a doubt she is doomed to the greatest misery once her little little little lit lit- tle fling is over unless something something something some some- thing can be done to keep her from front wasting her precious youth then spending the rest resto o of f her h hopeless life in vain regret In what way have we failed her We are not church members but Lou Betty-Lou and her brothers went to Sunday School when they were small and every lesson in honesty Integrity self control that the boys have had she has had too She must be a 1 throw-back throw to some ancestor an an- ancestor of whom we are ignorant for both my husbands husband's people and mine have always been law abiding gentIe gentle gen gen- tIe tle good men and women Must I Ilet Ilet let this child go on until she does docs something that destroys her chances of happiness forever How can I save her from herself hersel You must have handled cases as desperate as this one and must be able to understand understand understand under under- stand that as far as we e know she has no excuse for treating us this way What shall we do Many Girls Ruin Own Lives This is a sad letter and all aU the sadder to me because I know of no answer Sometimes the kindest gentlest most Intelligent of ot parents find themselves with a n child whose cold hard reckless nature is a n complete complete complete com com- mystery and often completely inefficient parents have sons and daughters who are the greatest pride and honor to them I know of ot one fine young lawyer upright and intelligent intelligent in in- and successful whose mother deserted him and ran of off with a lover when he was only three and whose father then made madea a most unfortunate marriage which ended in his being taken away from the custody of his own awn people And AndI I know a brother and sister both married now both parents both unusually unusually unusually un un- usually fine persons whose mothers mother's life was an actual scandal the children children chil chil- dren themselves having been dragged into court on one occasion to testify in a particularly unsavory suit And on the other hand there are many cases like that of Lou Betty a young girl with every advantage of background and cultivation who seems determined to ruin her own life and the happiness of ot those who love her Affection and patience are the only cure as far as her parents are concerned They must go bO on loving loving loving lov lov- ing her forgiving her trying to help her until her own eyes are arc opened And that awakening may not come until she has learned a bitter les les- les- les son Our town had a Lou Betty when I Iwas Iwas Iwas was a girL A headed fluffy-headed little beauty named Bessy who laughed at the prudishness and dullness o ot of the other g girls girls' lives and boasted of her conquests when the rest of us were begging the virtuous mothers of the nineties please to let us wear corsets and put up our hair Bessy got into an escapade with a married mar mar- ried man when she was 17 had a abad abad abad bad scare and quieted down for awhile married in haste at 19 was divorced two years later surrendering surrender ing fag her little boy to his father and married again at about the time her contemporaries were blissfully considering con con- considering their first marital venture |