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Show Most Be Born Again. " One day a gentleman called at the office of a. certain newspaper, and said to the editor: - "Sir, it Is announced in your paper that I am dead." .- . i . 'Well," replied the editor,, "if It is 'IB our paper it is correct." "It is not correct, for . here I am alive," rejoined the Other. "Well, it can't be helped," said the editor. "But I expect you to contradict it," said the injured man. "No, I can not do that," said the editor, "as. we never contradict anything any-thing that appears in our paper. I will do anything I can do. To-morrow I will put you in the list of births." London Spare Moments. L ' : Trouble in the Caravan. It was a hot day and the elephant was thirsty. "I haven't had anything to drink today," to-day," he said, turning to the camel. "I am told you carry a supply for three or four days. Could yon place a few of . your concealed water pouches at my disposal without too much inconvenience?" inconven-ience?" . ' "I don't have to carry water for the elephant," irritably answered the camel, humping itself along still faster. "I am a part of the show." Chicago Tribune. HARD ON HIM. 1 -.--- ' "You remind me of a page In a new book." ' :"Because I'm clever?" "No; I have to turn you down so-I- often to'keep you in your place." Rarely Remembered Her. "What has become," asked the occasional oc-casional guest, "of the pretty black-eyed black-eyed girl who used to wait at that table over in the corner?" "What pretty black-eyed girl?" frigidly frig-idly inquired the young woman with the snub nose and prorejnent chin. "If I remember rightly she had a little bit of a mole on one cheek." "Oh, that girl with the blotch on her face! I think somebody married her." Chicago Tribune. Suesestlne the Combination. "What will you like for dinner today, to-day, Henry?" "Anything you please. I feel too blue to care what I eat." "You feel blue and you look yellow. I'll cook a mess of greens for you " Chicago Tribune. A Lightning Destroyer. j "Your Charlie seems to be an active little fellow ir HnKK. .. Active? I put a clean shirt waist on him, and in five minutes he makes it look as if he had worn it a week " Indianapolis Journal. |