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Show Pulled the Rope Himself. Growells (at the theater) Mrs. Neighbors certainly does look charming charm-ing to-night. Mrs. Growells Yes. She has a husband hus-band who likes to see her dressed decently de-cently and isn't too grouchy to pay for It. Returning Good for Evil. "And to think that I came out her to chop down this very tree!" The Woman Usually Does. "Well," said she, as she laid down the book, "that's what I call a splendid story." "Held your interest, eh?" he remarked re-marked casually. "Indeed, it did; down to the last word." "The heroine had that, of course." The Wrong Man. "Oh, dad, look at the football player!" play-er!" exclaimed the Christmas boy. excitedly. "Hush, my son," said the parent, reprovingly. "That's not a football player that's an author who can't make money enough to have his hair cut!" His Preference. That man must have been a bit ot a wag who, when advertising in a matrimonial paper for "a nice young girl, of affectionate disposition, willing will-ing to make a good-looking bachelor happy," added the words, "Previous experience not necessary." The Critics. Ida "They say it was a case of love at first sight with him." May "What a pity he wasn't a medium and could have taken a second sight!" A Futile Wish. She "Do you know, I think masked balls are just lovely." He "Yes; I wish this was one." The Youth of To-Day. Visitor That fellow seems rather pert; acted as if he knew more than you. Merchant Naturally. Visitor Why Naturally? Merchant He's my son. Was Taking Chances. "Poor Fred's voice actually trembled when he proposed to me." "Yes, he told me he was scared almost al-most to death lest you discovered that he was accustomed to using that for-mula." for-mula." The Commoner. |