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Show MR. D00LEY ON THE SUFFRAGE. Citzen Dooley is usually to the fore with spicy comments on some topic of the moment. In the June American he considers woman's suffrage and points out that: "Women take a selfish view iv life. But what can ye expict fr'm a petted toy iv man's whim that has spent most iv her life thryin' to get four dollars worth iv merchandse f'r two dollars an' a half? Th' foolish, impractical little fluffy things ! It wud be a shame to let thim hurl thimsilves into th' coorse battles iv pollyticks. How cud ye explain to wan iv these ideelists why we have th' Philip-peens Philip-peens an' th' Sandyich Islands, an' why we keep up a navy to protict Denver, Colorado. ''We don't hear much about sufferage up our way in Ar-rchy road, an' th' ladies that have got outthei r noblest hats in behalf v th' cause complain com-plain that they can't stir up anny excitement among th' more numerous ladies that prefer to wear a shawl on their heads. Maybe th' reason is that these fair dhreamers haven't been able to figure out that a vote is goin' to do thim anny'good. P'raps if ye asked ye'er wife about it, she'd say: " 'Well, ye've had ye'er vote f'r forty years. F'r forty years ye've governed this counthry be a freeman's free-man's ballot, an' ye'er salary an' perquisites at th' mills still amounts, a dollar an' eighty-five cints a day. If a vote hasn't done ye anny more good thin that. I don't think I can spare time fr'm me domestic domes-tic jooties to use wan. I will continue to look afther th' fam'ly, which is th' on'y capital a poor man can accumylate to protict him fr'm poverty in his old age. I'll stay at home an' see that th' boys an' girls are saved up ontil they are old enough to wurruk f'r us. An' if ye want to amuse ye'erself be votin' go on an' do it. Ye need recreation wanst in a whle, an' ye'er vote don't do anny wan no harm.'" "I wudden't talk to me wife about votin' anny more thin she'd talk to me about thrimmin' a hat," said Mr. Hennessy. "Well," said Mr. Doeley, "if she gets a vote maybe she'Lthrim it to please ye. Annyhowit won't be a bad thing. What this country needs is voters that knows something about housekeeping." |