Show 1 Ml An Innocent Bystander The conflicting stories from Iran recall a quip that was popular with overseas newsboys during the war It concerns the Ministry of Information Information Wor- Wor mation carrier pigeon leisurely flyIng flying fly fly- ing to its destination when it was jostled by a second pigeon that shouted Get t a move on Ive I've got the denial A N. N Y Y editorial writer stated that Franklin D. D Roosevelt Jr cannot cannot cannot can can- not hope to be President because he was born in Canada and a Chief- Chief Exec must be a n native-born native Amer Amer- ican Overwhelming weight of legal opinion Anyone who is born of American parents in a foreign country country coun coun- try and properly registered can be I President Ho hum Any other questions I II I Another reason for tar our tense relations relations relations rela rela- with Russia is that the Americans Americans Amer Amer- Russia respected and trusted trusted trusted trust trust- ed most can no longer help us Iran I out differences Harry Hopkins Hopkins Hop Hop- I kins and Wendell Willkie It happened at the Brooklyn income in income income in- in come tax bureau recently Two men named Thomas McNally anc and Joseph Sweeney were having their tax forms filled out by an agent when they suddenly began speaking to each other in Yiddish Questioned Questioned Questioned Ques Ques- by the startled income tax agent agent McNally McNally and Sweeney explained explained explained ex ex- they were Dublin Dublin born born Jews Talk about blazing red faces A Afew Afew Afew few days after Lord Halifax publicly public public- ly opined that Goering was anxious to prevent war war Goering Goering testified at the war crimes trial and took every opportunity to praise Hitler Hit Hit- ler the ler-the the Nazi system system and and everything everything everything every every- thing the Nazis did A quip causing tee-hees tee in some of the back rooms in Argentina conI concerns concerns con con- I cerns the recent incident when Mrs Peron turned up at a social soiree During the evening one of the I guests turned to his neighbor and remarked Well there sits Argentinas Argentina's Argen Argen- tunas tuna's First Lady I no lady was the retort his wife wile I The State Dept has been shoved around like a revolving door Bunow But Bu now it has been the complimented the Rankin Committee plans to probe the SD Rankins Rankin's witch hunt ing spree recalls the time a Dies Die Committee member Cong J. J Parnell Parnell Par Par- nell Thomas ranted that the theater was a hot bed of communism communism and demanded the investigation tion of a play titled Prologue to Glory The play concerned an American I named Abe Lincoln Quotation Marksmanship John W. W Raper A man picks a wife the same way an apple picks a farmer D. D Yates Bold as the bark o oa of ofa a puppy Voltaire The ea eais ear earIs earis is the road to the heart Muriel Murie Gaines His wrinkles are o overload overload- i ed with decisions Singapore Sal The only difference among women is their faces James II Kelly She walked as though she were carrying a chip on her hip Nancy Donovan An actor full of Chinese Proverb Proverb Proverb erb The broadminded see the truth In d different religions the narrow narrow- minded see only their differences Seaman Jacobs' Jacobs opinion o of a guy with no initiative Hes He's always in there catching Wm Schiller Our friendship with Russia seems to be strictly Eileen Deneen War do we go from here Sallies In Our Alley A Broadway Broadway Broad Broad- way showman walked up to a new new- lovely comer last night and asked Want to work in my night club as asa asa asa a showgirl To which her companion agent Paul Small said I offered her a receptionists receptionist's job only today at 25 5 a week and she laughed at me The showman indignantly rejoined Youre no not offering people 25 a week these days Who are you to talk barked the agent offer i ito It to a star Ozzie Ozzle Nelson says when a a shows show's a success the producer producer producer pro pro- ducer knocks wood When it isn't Isn he knocks critics I I Midtown l Vignette At the Bernard Ber- Ber I nard Baruch dinner for far Mr Churchill Church Church- ill Cardinal Spellman was also an honored guest Baruch is a tall tail man Churchill Is a shorty and anc they were having quite a time of it with the microphone Until that thatis is a n volunteer got up to help The mike-adjuster mike raising It high high or low was the Cardinal Years ago when a talking double official told newsmen I III never said sale that although a dozen reporters knew that he had one editor ridiculed ridiculed ridiculed ridi ridi- him by sending him the following fol fol- lowing note Sir You may recollect we printed print print- ed yesterday your our denial of having retracted retract d the contradiction of your our original statement Would you care to have us say that you were misquoted misquoted misquoted mis mis- quoted In regard to it Confucius Warmongers Making Mountain Out Of Ot A Churchill |