| Show kathleen norri norms s says dont doitt marry army beau in haste nall service i C L r AW ile A 8 JL CC A fe 11 1 CG 10 1 0 tr 3 4 kh A man who is almost a stranger to the girl returns return home perhaps he hat has beers been wounded in mind or body in the years of adjustment that must follow this war hermay he may not he be fortunate in finding his place for a while anyway by KATHLEEN NORRIS THE HE problem of whether a girl shall marry her soldier before he goes away or promise to wait for him and marry him when he gets home is a very serious one and as is usual in marital questions it is a matter about which one cant generalize everything depends upon the girls character and the mans and how long they have known each other in 1917 1017 a young woman of my m acquaintance was deeply in lovo love with a certain gallant gall antil swain and they were to be married before he went to france franca her father and mother persuaded her to make it a rockbound rock bound engagement instead and that was the understanding when bill went away both being persons persona of honor they met when he came back in december more than a year later with ue the engagement still valid between them but after a tew few days they mutual ly confessed to changed feelings and betty with infinite relief found herself free to marry an older nan iman whose friendship had come 1 to mean everything in the I 1 world orld to her in the 18 28 months of bf separation bob shortly followed suit by marrying a demure little french girl for whom ho ha sent immediately and both ma marriages Inges have proved eminently successful with friendship maintained all round this have been tho the case it if betty had insisted on the week of thrill and marriage and farewells that tha t was all she could have had in the war year shining shifting affections thero there were many tragic cases of shifting young affections in those years the girls who had only a few days or weeks of wifehood to remember discovered that theirs real marriages no adjusting and growing to know each other was included and consequently it was hard to regard them as binding so my answer to scores of girls who are asking me ine now whether to marry their army beaux Is walt wait of course there are exceptions girls and men sure of their own feelings anxious only to have their little hour of happiness before tho the war clouds thicken for these marriage under any circumstances Is sate safe but sode sometimes times what actuates the girl is the glamour of the new man and his new uniform end and the determination to seize this hour of life anyway no matter what tomorrow may bring tomorrow comes come A man who is almost a stranger returns home perhaps he be has been wounded in soul or or body in tho the years of adjustment that must follow this war he may not be fortunate in finding hla his place for a while anyway or perhaps he has seen somewhere the other woman the woman he really loves on the other coffier hand what does a girl lose ilose by waiting she gets to work as all girls must nowadays the she writes her soldier letters full of cheerful nonsense she sends him boxes of the things he needs and if by chance some come other man comes along and her affection goes to him at least she Is much better off in writing on an honest letter to her man in the army than it if she be were his wife is an undeveloped chitow fickle little creature of only COUNT THE COST are you sure that you will love hint him as much a few months or a jew years from now are you sure that if ho fee comes homo home weary and dis C you will ho be able to help him find his place in a changed world are ara you sure that if ho he conics comes home sick sich or wounded you will be willing to nurse hint him back bach to health or cheerfully face the fact that ho to will always be an invalid I 1 if you are arc then by all means marry him now and arize those few moments moment of happiness to which you leel feel you are entitled if not WAIT 18 she married ried a navy man in october had just three days of honey moon she wrote me this letter in december and it has made me somewhat thoughtful regrets hasty marriage mother and dad think I 1 am vety very bad to want to have dates and go dancing her letter says but I 1 am too young to sit knitting socks with all the old women I 1 nat told me to have a good ume time and not mope when I 1 was crying my eyes out saying goodby good by and I 1 am sure it if he thought that way other people ought to let me alenel but here Is the thing I 1 met an englishman last month who la Is my ideal of a hero ile he is in the RAF MAY way was wounded and cannot fly again but he Is going back to england after a six months rest to go into the ground service life with such a man would be 0 one ne long thrill there is not a girl here who is not crazy about him from the beginning however he seemed to pick me out as hla his especial friend and he Is at the house quite often ho he is 17 years older than p I 1 am but my father and mother heartily like him too my father was born in england in the some same place sidney comes from sidney is divorced and has a little boy of 12 his former wife lives in hollywood and he went there to see her apparently they are still friends friend but I 1 am sure that it I 1 was tree free he would want me tor for his bis wife and while I 1 hope I 1 am too sensible to ask poor nat for a divorce I 1 hardly know how to handle the situation tor for nat may be at sea for months and I 1 would like to say something definite to sidney before he returns to england an extreme case my feeling for nat was that of a child pity and affection and excitement cit ement and the thought of being married on my eighteenth birthday which I 1 had always planned but what I 1 feel for sidney is the deepest and truest emotion of my life although I 1 devoutly trust that there are few american girls capable of writing such a letter it does present an extreme case of the difficulties that attend a sudden war parting wedding and girls who are wise enough to look forward more than a few weeks might learn something from it in europe engagements always have been longer than they are with us one meets over there wives who cheerfully admit waiting three years five years one happy english wife engaged in 1013 did not shear hear wedding bells bell until 1919 but when she did hear them they were real wedding bells and her dignity and courage and pat patience ienco have brought her a rich reward |
