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Show B2 The Emery County Review, Tuesday, August 26, 2008 The FAMILY PAGE Horoscope Focus On The Family Crossword Figuratively Speaking FOCUS ON THE FAMILY Adolescence can be a Difficult Time for Kids, Parents Dr. James Dobson Q My teenage son is becoming increasingly difficult to get along with. Isn’t there some way to avoid this blackout period and the other stresses associated with the adolescent voyage? Not with some teenagers, perhaps not with the majority. Tension occurs in the most loving and intelligent of families. Why? Because it is driven by powerful hormonal forces that overtake and possess boys and girls in the early pubescent years. I believe parents and even some behavioral scientists have underestimated the impact of the biochemical changes occurring in puberty. We can see the effect of these hormones on the physical body, but something equally dynamic is occurring in the brain. How else can we explain why a happy, contented, cooperative twelve-yearold suddenly becomes a sullen, angry, depressed thirteen-year-old? Some authorities would contend that social pressure alone accounts for this transformation. I simply don’t believe that. The emotional characteristics of a suddenly rebellious teenager are rather like the A symptoms of premenstrual syndrome or severe menopause in women, or perhaps a tumultuous mid-life crisis in men. Obviously, dramatic changes are going on inside! Furthermore, if the upheaval were caused entirely by environmental factors, its onset would not be so predictable in puberty. The emotional changes I have described arrive right on schedule, timed to coincide precisely with the arrival of sexual maturation. Both characteristics, I contend, are driven by a common hormonal assault. Human chemistry apparently goes haywire for a few years, in some more than others, affecting mind as much as body. I have a two-year-old boy who is as cute as a bug’s ear and I love him dearly, but he nearly drives me crazy. He throws the most violent temper tantrums and gets into everything. Why is he like this Q and are other toddlers so difficult? Your description of your toddler comes right out of the child development textbooks. That time of life begins with a bang (like the crash of a lamp or a porcelain vase) at about eighteen months of age and runs hot and heavy until about the third birthday. A toddler is the most hard-nosed opponent of law and order, and he honestly believes the universe circles around him. In his cute little way, he is curious and charming and funny and lovable and exciting and selfish and demanding and rebellious and destructive. Comedian Bill Cosby must have had some personal experience with toddlers. He is quoted as saying, “Give me two hundred active two-year-olds and I could conquer the world.” Children between fifteen and thirty-six months of age do not want to be restricted or inhibited in any manner, nor are they inclined to conceal their opinions. Bedtime becomes an exhausting, dreaded ordeal each night. They want to play with everything in reach, particularly fragile and expensive ornaments. They prefer using their pants rather than the potty, and insist on eating with their hands. And most of what goes in A FIGURATIVELY SPEAKING HOROSCOPES BY HOLIDAY Holiday Mathis Week of Aug. 24. This week’s Virgo new moon is the ultimate fix-it girl: She’s a cosmic trainer/physician/healer/best friend, all wrapped up in one. Where there’s a problem or a need, this lunation ensures that an expert is on hand. It may be easy to view our personal shortcomings through a microscopic lens, but by doing so we finally ask for and receive the support we need to raise us to our next level of personal excellence. ARIES (March 21-April 19). Sometimes even the warrior of the zodiac is better off taking the noncompetitive approach. There are challenges that are best passed up. You have nothing to prove, so why engage the energy of struggle? At least that’s how you’re likely to approach life before Thursday. There’s dignity in your ability to stay centered. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You’re no snob, far from it. You find inspiration in what the weirdos, eccentrics and geeks are doing. You appreciate the eccentricities of geniuses and children. You’re open and ready to receive your muse, in whatever form it comes. By Thursday you’re already laying the groundwork for your next great creation. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Though you’re in hot pursuit of a very important goal, practice being satisfied with all you currently have. The more you count your blessings, the more blessings there will be to count. Weekend offerings are diverse. Whatever you choose, follow through. The prize comes only after you cross the finish line. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Though you may or may not have an official title and role in the groups you participate in this week, you’re a leader and everyone knows it. All the time you spend joking, flirting and tossing around compliments is good for group morale. The weekend brings an exciting turning point for one of your long-term projects. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Are you waiting on hold while your friend takes the other call? Is someone avoiding helping you with a task that’s been on your list for months? You wouldn’t mind getting more respect from your inner circle, and this week you figure out just how to get it. You let everyone know you’re moving on, with or without them. THIS WEEK’S BIRTHDAYS: It’s a year of lovely variations. Because you refuse to take the well-trodden path, your experiences will be eclectic and exciting. Others may not be able to keep up with your constantly Continued on Page B3 their mouths is not food. When they break loose in a store, they run as fast as their little legs will carry them. They pick up the kitty by its ears and then scream bloody-murder when scratched. They want mommy within three feet of them all day, preferably in the role of their full-time playmate. Truly, the toddler is a tiger -- but a precious one. I hope you won’t get too distressed by the frustrations of the toddler years. It is a very brief period of development that will be over before you know it. With all its challenges, it is also a delightful time when your little boy is at his cutest. Approach him with a smile and a hug. But don’t fail to establish yourself as the boss during this period. All the years to come will be influenced by the relationship you build during this 18-month window. (Dr. Dobson is founder and chairman of the board of the nonprofit organization Focus on the Family, Colorado Springs, CO 80995(www.family.org). Questions and answers are excerpted from “Solid Answers” and “Bringing Up Boys,” both published by Tyndale House. Copyright 2008 James Dobson Inc. Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate.) John MacIntyre 16: Percentage of U.S. workers who regularly attend after-work drinks with co-workers who say they bad-mouthed a colleague, according to a survey for CareerBuilder.com. 8: Percentage who kissed a colleague. 4: Percentage who con- fessed to singing karaoke. Source: CareerBuilder.com. 62: Percentage of Ameri- can teens who agree that the Olympics help to build a better and more peaceful world, according to a study conducted by Harris Interactive. 71: Percentage of teens interested in the Olympics who agree that the Games are about more than merely medals and marketing. Source: Harris Interactive. $16,548: At the end of four years, the expense of keeping a 2003 6-cylinder, 4-door sedan that gets 21 miles per gallon (mpg) -- includes costs of fuel, license, registration, taxes, insurance, maintenance and tires, according to Runzheimer International. $12,789: With a resale value of $3,759, the total four-year cost. $32,258: At the end of four years, the expense of buying a new 6-cylinder, 4-door sedan with 23.5 mpg that costs $23,451 with a down payment of $10,158 -- the trade-in value of the older car -- and includes the car payment, interest on the car loan, fuel, license, registration, taxes, insurance, maintenance and tires. $23,683: With a resale value of $8,575, the total four-year expense. $10,894: Over the four- number of Americans who move to a new location every year, according to research conducted by the Cable and Telecommunications Association for Marketing. 70: Percentage of adults who admit to feeling some level of anxiety about moving. 35: Percentage who say they “dread it completely.” Source: CTAM. 63: Percentage of Ameri- cans ages 18 to 39 who say they have credit card debt, according to Employee Benefit Research Institute. 48: Percentage who have a car debt. 31: Percentage who have a student loan debt. year period, the difference in the savings between keeping a car and buying a new one. Source: Car Care Council. 27: Percentage who have 40 million: Estimated number of U.S. workers who telecommute at least once a week, according to a CCH nationwide survey. medical debt. Source: EBRI. 22 million: Estimated 53: Percentage of U.S. companies that offer telecommuting programs. 45: Percentage of employ- ers who offer a compressed work week option. Source: Wolters Kluwer Law and Business CCH. 1, 2, 3: Ranks of online training (60 percent), video conferencing (52 percent) and collaborative-workspace software (43 percent) as the most popular responses made by chief information officers when asked which tools their firms currently use or anticipate using, according to Robert Half Technology. Source: Robert Half Technology. 75: Percentage of car shop- pers who say they have made changes to further the betterment of the environment, according Kelley Blue Book Marketing Research study. 1, 2, 3: Ranks of recycling (54 percent), cutting back on driving (46 percent) and purchasing a fuel-efficient car (31 percent) as the top lifestyle changes mentioned. Source: Kelley Blue Book. Idle Thought “Real success is finding your lifework in the work that you love.” -- David McCullough (Copyright 2008 John MacIntyre Inc. Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate.) Puzzle answers on Page B3 |