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Show ee ae age eet oo _22 March - 4 April 1995, Wasatch Canyon Reporter, Page 3 Wasatch Canyon Reporter Volume 1, Issue 9 22 March INN 1995 78 ROSS COURTNEY MUD AND DAVID MASSAGES 7 ADAM | WASATCH EVENT CALENDAR 8-9 Advertising Sales Executives Jon “TWanna’’Atencio UDOT REVIEWED 10 Mark “IWantToWrite” Stock SARA Cover Boy Kelly “HardDrive” Hancock - issvu-E ALTA ELEMENTARY Publisher John Stuart Carter Bresee Staff Typist David Charles Baker Production Manager & CFO S.E. “Halo” Balog Out of Town Editor David Adam Christopher Peck Staff Mystic R.J. “Syndication-Here-I-Come” Pinner Real Estate Editor AlexAnder Miller Editor At Large David “BigEmma” Doherty 7 THs | Michael “Scalp” Henderson Contributors Sara J. Lindeman Ross Courtney Lori Stahler Mystic’s Conduit to the Stars Marta Heilbrun Contributing Photographers Virginia “St.Patrick’sDay” Pearce Chris “BigHair’” Murray Craig Dillon Lee Cohen Copy Editors | J. LINDEMAN BIG RON’S ALPINE ASTROLOGY 1 FELICIA FEEDS: POMODORO sis FELICIA OLIVERA IN SOME ISSUES: EDITORIAL 2 LETTERS 4 CALENDAR 8-9 BULLWHEEL 14 CLASSIFIED 13 SPORTS PAGE 12 Mara (Wanna?) Walsh Carolyn “Honey Bear” Uhle Employee of the Month Felicia “FrontDesk” Olivera Equipment Manager Peter “Goatee” Alving Intern Sara Lindeman WCR Legal Team Brady “Jellyfinger” Toensing Eddy “Vapors” Carrrolll, II, ESQ Adam “Slip & Fall Guy” Chase _ Staff Physician Kimmy Walton Publishing Consultants ** COVER _ TO SUBSCRIBE: $20 for about a year, $38 for two or so, $54.20 for threeish, $68.78 for approximate four years, $1000 for a WASATCH CANYON REPORTER 8118, ALTA UT PHOTO BY:Chris “Big Hair’ Murray «George Katavolos “* LOCATION: Cardiff Ridge line at dawn + Marc “Sparky” Palmer & baby brother Jeremy Dt veally Paice, Stop by and ask Carl to ne you the photograph. + ’ Video available for $ 2 OOO. lifetime subscription’; to: SUBSCRIPTION DIVISION, PO BOX 84092-8118. Despite what you may hear or read, we really do send out the papers, eventually. New, special offer: BUY 10 SUBSCRIPTIONS for $200 prepaid, GET 1 FREE”*. Order them for all your friends. *Do available. Letters to the EDITOR should go to the same address. We publish every one we get if it has your name and address and it doesn’t call anyone a *@$%#&! or discuss dangling toilet parts.. We'll withhold your identity if you ask, but we gotta give it to the man when he calls. The Wasatch Canyon Reporter is a community newspaper published approximately every other WEDNESDAY (usually late) throughout the whole year [causing future “Volume” confusion]; the next issue comes out around the 5th of April. The medium altitude alternative published by another bunch of people with a computer and a laser printer. (Actually, we borrow the laser printer.) In the summer probably once a month is all we can handle. This paper is staffed almost exclusively with Cottonwood Canyons employees but we'll take anyone. 10,000 issues are mailed or hand-delivered to a wide variety of people and places in and around our canyons, the lower 48, and the world (one ” issue goes to Hong Kong). We can’t afford that subscription verification service yet, so trust us. All material © 1995 and all that. Printed on partiallyrecycled paper. No swiping our brilliance without written permission of the editor or somebody. To call us: 801-486.1388. The facsimile number is 485.2735. Sometimes we print even these incorrectly. Keep trying. The opinions expressed in this august publication are those of the writer & we hope you too if it’s that kind of article. Many people lack a good, solid sense of humor. Try to find yours if you read something you hate. Until you see a “Fact Checker’ listed above, accuracy is not guaranteed. Caveat Emptor. You get what you pay for. If you don’t agree with something, write a letter. Or better yet, type a coherent article of 1,000 words or more. Send it to us on an IBMcompatible disk with printout. We have MS-Word, Lotus Ami Pro WordPerfect for DOS. None of that Apple stuff, please. Wasatch Canyon Reporter PO Box 8118 Alta UT 84092-8118 To chat 801-486-1388 Facsimile 485-2735 CompuServe E-Mail 72557,2760 : & re this and get a free psychiatric interview from “Dr.” Baker. No aliens were harmed in the creation of this paper. Back issues $2 each. Bulk discounts |