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Show THE SEARCHLIGHT Surely, Can’t they tial orders workers, as COONS as | | 7 Professor, the workingmen realize they are being bunked and tricked, don’t they? understand that the sack makers are the bosses’ relatives carrying out the confidenof the Colonel and Doug? Can’t they see that instead of being a brotherhood oj it pretends, it is a brother-in-law tong serving the Great and the Peewee TYa composite hatchetman? No. No. that . You see, and the Colonel they have Utah up ‘‘cooperation Children. Even newspaper men that feature of Snipe Hunting is get out of the game, and might Copper’s propaganda department as the common tool?’’. and other ultra-bright people are unaware of kept very quiet. It might spoil the fun Doug cost them six-bits or a dollar in wages. So divert attention from sack holding by playing Professor, why do the officers and trustees questionable hoax on the decent workmen at Utah of the Snipe Hunt consent to play such a Copper? Have they no sense of fair play? My dear young friends, when you grow up and become more sophisticated you will understand why. Here are a few of the reasons. Reed Damron, the President and trusted caretaker of the Snipe Hunt, is a son-in-law of the foundry superintendent from whom he learned the art of fashioning Snipe Hunt sacks. Russ Burton, who has long acted as come-on for the Snipe Hunt in the machine shop, is a brother-in-law of the mill superintendent. Russ uses the technique of a Church deacon. Ray Brown, another leading Snipe Hunt official, is a brother- in-law of the master mechanic. Ray is an expert at using honey to catch flies. much either. If honey is rationed, Ray will still get along very well. Are all of the Snipe Hunt leaders He doesn’t need relatives of the bosses, Professor Greene? No, Children. Some of the most capable leaders of the Snipe Hunt rose to eminence on their own power. For instance, E. M. Lambert became an-extra boss in his own right in the time office. He dotes on making Doug and the Colonel happy. Lambert agrees with the tycoons that dividends—generous dividends—come first. Nearly all of the Snipe Hunt officers are given special rewards. Those not related to a boss, like Art Marsh, are endowed with superlative faith and are supplied with rose-colored glasses. A few like Ed Cannon and Charlie Brooks were great even in childhood. The literary output of Brooks, under the meandering pen name of ‘‘ Mose Eon’’ deserves a place in the literature of the Nation—although there are those who hint that some of it is written by Chilly Charlie Parsons, Doug’s astute counsel. Professor, is the Snipe Hunt Sh! Children. National Sh! Labor a Government Doug Relations Board coffin. Doug and still a thriving enterprise? and the Salt Lake papers are trying to keep it secret, but the on February 20th laid the Snipe Hunt Reed away very tenderly in Damron, using ‘‘cooperation as the common tool’’ tried to bring it back to hfe. They took its Ghost over to Denver to appear before the Nonferrous Metals Commission, but the Commission refused to believe in Ghosts, much less to have anything to do with one. The sad truth, my dear young friends, is that the Snipe Hunt has perished even though Doug and the Colonel refuse to believe it. Class “Editor’s Note: Searchlight December is dismissed.* Professor Greene’s ‘‘Simple Lessons in Snipe Hunting’’ appeared in the 27th, 1940. special edition of the Searchlight. At our request the Professor re-wrote the Lesson for this |