Show RULES FOR A MAN WHO IS CON TEM PLATING MATRIMONY facts to ascertain when meeting an attractive young woman with whom aou a may fall la in love Is she selfish 7 you can tell this in three NN vaa al s by the manner in which phe listens to what say by the way she accepts what 3 ou do tor for her and by the difference between themay the way she treats you and the way she treats others Is she fickle if she talks about light things she isn t fc deep she Is Is she extravagant 7 by the way she protests against your spending money on her and always arranges matters so that 1 1 cant help but do it Is she a bad housekeeper 7 9 by the way she dresses if she isn t and span she isn t it she is then she Is THE SOLUTION when you have satisfied your mind that she Is all of these things marry fier at once it if you can get her for the following reasons first because if she really loves you she bill mill change second because it 1 ou lne loie her it will be so much more interesting third because you are probably 0 mistaken about her anyway judge one thing or the other when fickle fortune tackles men were we re hither thither burled hurled and then Us said ot of certain folks world the in they re way up but others not so lucky in this buffeting about are thus described in pointed phrase poor things they re down and 4 1 1 lite life AT THE THC HACES RACES a A loy cf I 1 pinks dinks I 1 just won ten dollars on a horse that didn t have any tall winka 1 I ju just jut t lost ten dollars on one that didn dian t have any head mane marie there once was a girl named marle marie I 1 am lonely so lonely said she when he asked her to wed t d 4 she answered and said yes siree yes siree yes siree 1 1 rf ao milwaukee sentinel 14 il 14 would get to them fireman I 1 have the honor to an ail bounce f flounce that the fire Is in the fourth story and our ladders and huse will reach only to the second captain indeed then well have to wait till the flames come down to the second hope for him I 1 I 1 m afraid said the embryo states man enan that III never be able to mold public opinion 4 oh I 1 dont don t know rejoined the political boss some ot of the stories you introduce in your speeches are rather moldy chicago news REPAIRING t it 0 bill well its all aboard for me gill going to see the yacht race 9 nope going to build a fence N Y telegram the qu ck lunch fiend wt then later on there comes to him A ery very common question lie wonders how jt t was that he contracted indigestion milwaukee sentinel THE SH EARMARKS OF ABILITY P 11 don Is he a good editor 1 art I 1 should say so look at the long scissors he uses the qu acker way all things come to him who waits perhaps true well let em with me the only tl ti ings I 1 got I 1 had to go and get em tan airs judge well how is everything singa asked the patent churn man who had just returned from a two months absente pruntytown Prunty town going ahead any anya aw you batcha Us promptly re plied the landlord ot of the tavern who was filled with local pride prunty town is getting taner and taner ever every day of the world why lemme tell you bilder back the owner of the op opry ry house has just whirled in and built a comi iodious new dressing room tor for the bloodhounds and an ice fee house for ellza eliza after this when uncle toms tom s cabin comes to this town it can be played just exactly as harriet beech er stowe wrote it and if that ain t going some I 1 d know what you d call it puck exactly I 1 think I 1 know the secret of your daughter daughters s nervous condition my dear madam but her youth is in her favor oh doctor what is it ita she is suffering from a cardiac fracture oh what heartbreaking news baltimore sun ELECTRIC OR GASOLINE 41 10 orr ab 1 L I tk 51 1 4 r caleton our varsity football team has a great coach this year miss ample I 1 should think they d 9 get et an auto clever repartee tep men have reason to dread nimble tongued women A certain clever au tharess was once asked by a writer ot of the opposite sex who Is not remark able tor for civility wouldn t you like to bi be a mana man to this the lady readily replied wouldn t 5 ou the important feature there Is a great deal of injustice in literature yes answered miss cayenne they still insist on putting the name nam e of 0 the author on a book instead of that of the man mail who makes the handsome cover design washington star good memory and bad Gu customer stomer cigar ing is said to have a deleterious effect on the mem ory are you aware of thata gluch stein I 1 can quite believe it for instance you have not yet paid for that box of cigars you had last christ mas in auto terms how did you enjoy the opera very poor it t had plenty of horse power but one of the cylinders was missing most ot of the time life |