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Show For MEMBERS OF Lumpy's A REALLY FUN PRIVATE CLUB APPAPSRT APPIN: Let the Games Begin Lady’s Man or Olympic Guru? PORCH IS OPEN Tom to recent Welch, press reports, former president of the Salt Lake Olympic Committee, is more than SEATS SIX oe RESERVATIONS aie Welch has been the Utah ambassador to the By 1.B. Rappaport ccording just a smooth talker. OK, wait a minute. I said that wrong. Let me start again: According to the circus atmosphere in the press lately, Tom Welch is more than just some guy who can do a good job at talking up a bunch of games er, I mean sporting events. Hold it, hold it. That’s not right either. One pre SINGE APRIL '88 3000 South ar ns Drive wo JAIMIE * Try our new | APPETIZERS from DINERS CHOICE! more time: Tom Welch, Olympic Guru, former Mormon bishop and all around red-blooded American guy was recently reported to have told his wife that he was having an extra-marital affair. This bit of information coming in a police report resulting from a 9-1-1 call from an 11-yearold boy who said that his-parents were wrestling in the garage. Poor Mrs. Welch. Can you imagine? The details keep creeping out. According to police, Mrs. Welch was attempting to find evidence of the other woman in her hus- band’s car when the altercation took place. She was apparently searching for gifts and letters while Tom was intent on keeping her The Jammin Salmon is a from finding any evidence of the clandestine private club located in the lower level of Z Place at 427 Main Street, Park City Call for Info 658-FISH ARTS FEST WEEKEND FRI-SAT AUGUST 1-2 LOCAL ROCKERS Maka Bon ; Friday-94 pts? Oe 1997 14 « AUGUST PAGE however, just goes too far. Can you imagine driving up to a herd of grazing elephants in an air-conditioned Land Rover. Having your guide place a highpowered rifle in your hands with a telescopic sight and BLAM!? Killing these dignified giants is unspeakable. What kind of human being would kill these majestic and endangered animals for sport? Mother pie and applehood, indeed. That’s about as sporting as putting your wife in a headlock. If the head Olympic sports guy is into that kind of thing - leave alone chasing women - then maybe it is time for a change. It makes you wonder if all this highfalutin’ globe-traveling Olympic rah-rah hasn't gone to the poor boy’s head. Think about it: Welch is traveling all over the world meeting with Juan Antonio Samaranche, a guy Mrs. Welch later told police she thought who likes people to-call him “Excellency.” Tom would kill her. Little did Mrs. Welch know that when in the middle of the scuffle she told her son to call the police, the whole mess would become public record. Still, this embarrassing fracas would be nothing more than an unfortunate incident That, in and of itself, could get you believing : Mutineers rears Poets Auugust | I6 & the eo . is ve a BB Walker My youre someone high and mighty. It could be that Tom has suffered through too many trips to Europe on the caviar cir- Pau Lady Gscorts roel CSR & the Roadsters ie Friday & 9 This is getting worse by the minute, The great American sport of picking up women (or men) is one thing. Shooting wildlife, gaurd om Lisa Marie ness ee Friday & ee brown stuff hit the blades last month. Extramarital affairs are one thing. But shooting defenseless elephants is quite another. cuit with his Excellency and the entourage of would-be jet-setters who like to treat themselves to the best anyone has to lavish upon them. Whether this includes women or eleand none of any body's damn business, phants is any body’s guess. except for one.thing: Tom-,Welch is our More-and more the whole thing seems x Olympic Guru. And ‘the Olympics have béen represented as some sort of patriotic _like a bad dream:" “Maybe someone should ee mall? ye apean ago. @ motherhood and apple pie-thing. Tos loTH MOUNTAT | liaison with a headlock. entire Olympic world. In fact, this reporter could forgive him the whole unsorted affair - no pun intended - if he hadn't gone elephant hunting after the August 27 ~ , at @ monunts nol Ue 328-3536 oe ces Se ¢ iS = © 350 East 400 South Salt Lake City, Utah 84111 w.slweekiy.com * ‘lt toke City Weekly DING GUIDE on the Web ae at ats |