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Show .. | ELEVATE Please Stop Me Hopelessly Addicted to Cheap Stuff By Randy Hanskat ow did I get hooked on the stuff in the first place? door. Of course, I could simply return it, without charge, but ... maybe I'll just peek. Ooh, that looks like a tasty read. Another price. book finds its way to the shelf. How could I say, no? Automatic mailing is devious, but there's more. Inside the mailers are invitations to join other book clubs, and there's sure to be So, I tried them. Now look at me. I'can't stop myself. Every month, I anxiously stand by my mailbox, peering inside, looking right past the Victoria's Secret catalog with nary a flicker of the eye, seeing if they're in there - This past month, there was even a club called One Spirit, "The first club to celebrate and explore spirit, mind, and body." This sounds like a pyramid scheme, a ver- Well, it started innocuously enough, with someone offering a handful at a really cheap Paperback How could I know what "Four Books for Four Bucks" would lead to? I grew up in a house full of books - moy- ing took like 40 boxes just for the books. Unlike home, my apartment was thin on books, my bookcase lamely filled with old textbooks: important keepers like Secrets of an Advertising Man, Our Bodies Our Selves, and Americanism vs. Communism. So I welcomed the chance to get some real books. How they found me I don't know, but the QPBC promo mailer spoke to me, man: "Take any four of these great books, each for just one dollar." All you had to do was buy two more books at club prices sometime in the next 2,000 years, or so. No big deal. But was there a warning about the addictive qualities of QPBC? I think not. Then the books came. Full-size beauties, just like the hardcovers, but in soft cover. Would I have time to read them? Probably not, but still | needed more - the first sign of addiction. The monthly mailers, QPBC Review and Club Views, are the keys to their narcotic-like hold. From the descriptions, every book sounds as if it should have won a Pulitzer. In each issue | find two or three books I must have. Hey, and if you buy one at full price, any others are half price! That's virtually free, right? Plus, there are triple bonus points, so they're even more free! In reality, they should call the monthly specials "Deals for the Weak Who Can't Refuse Us." Incapable of making a decision about which books to select, not unlike a dog torn between the roast beef bone and the ham bone, I put the reviews away for awhile. Then comes the sneaky part: On the reply card it says the club will ship this month's selection, unless they hear otherwise from me by a certain date. In my purchase decision vacillation, that date usually lapses and sure enough the month's selection comes knocking at my in your mailing is a piece which details how you can get free books when you get a friend to join for the "Four for $4" deal. Cool, more books for my habit. I sold the notion to a woman at work who is really into crafts and stuff - The Homestyle Book Club had her name on it! I mean, one can never have enough books, like Decorating for Christmas and Crafts from Everyday Stuff, can one? Now she is a fellow club addict, too. So, heré I sit, looking at my QPBC and BOMCE reply cards. I have 44 bonus points with QPBC. Hey, that's almost two free books - free being a relative term when you count pricey shipping and handling! But the book I really want is the Main Selection of this month's BOMC Review. What's a poor addict to do?" 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Youth classes and five for-credit telecourses are also available. Call 654-8638 (585-7313 from Salt Lake) for details and to register for any class. Processing + Custom Enlarging, Negatives or Slides + Portrait & Commercial Studio » Passport Photos + Unique Photo Frames & Accessories 649-6465 eT A Walking Tour 5) 950 Painting* the Beginner 26-Aug. 14 Dog Obedience Training Ce wate Ske ae) ° SAWIL NIVLINNOW King.-Included Quality Park City/U of U classes start all summer long. itable Amway of Gore Vidal and Stephen Reviews. Book Club and Book-of-the-Month Club. I'm addicted, man. Book-of-the-Month one that entices you: Homestyle Book Club, History Book Club, Children's Book Club. G 1DVd my QPBC and BOMC Huh? Book clubs, man: | YOUR | MIND |