Show A Montana man has las invented a af I f potato Now let some genius v c get busy and aud Invent a s sausage usage I f Naples is ii Inclined to be disconsolate I Because a scientist has predicted that the ithe volcanic will go out of business before be be- fore tore long I be Desiring to know which nation Is r his truest Mend the sultan of Morocco co will see sei which responds quickest to a touch C t i Have patience with the n new w gradual al t ate After bumping against the world for a few weeks he will discover his limitation j. j In order to be on the safe side side Mayor MayI May May- or Weaver of Philadelphia should hire I r 1 a trustworthy understudy to keep i rr watch at right deficit It is announced that the postal deficit cit elt this year will wUl be about I I. I I The authors must be getting fewer f. f sV 0 I manuscripts back i 1 One hundred automobiles were destroyed destroyed de- de by fire tire in New York a day or j. j two ago but you ou will not be be able to jL notice any difference f. f Having had so many other casual casualties I ties in actual experience it was no novelty at a al aU for the battleship Texas to be be- sunk theoretically According to a Russian in London Ii hr Admiral name is pronounced pronounced pro pro- pronounced with the accent on the second sec sec- see see- and ond syllable Can you manage it i J Preparations are being made to exP exterminate exterminate ex ex- I P terminate the mosquitoes but the odds v are re that the news isn't causing a boom to tn n mosquito life insurance circles r Twelve of Americas America's famous men wrote to an Iowa schoolboy boy that the f f secret of success success is real hard work Ifo and eleven of the tw twelve lve were lawyers lawyers law law- tK 1 ers T King Alfonso made friends while he f was in London but there is no authority authority au au- I for the assertion that King ki Edward now familiarly calls him Allie i A preacher has been asked to resign resign re re- Ji sign his pulpit because he uses an anA A automobile The dispatches do not say whether he inherited his money or married it A K I c A New York man was fined 20 20 the J g Other ther day for catching a trout that was wasl l Jt v i less Jess ess than six inches long But the thery ry V J Judge fridge ought to have seen the one I that Jut away r There are many forms of misfortune tn in this world but none quite so peculiar peculiar r I liar as that of the Chicago man who fx j brought rought suit for an injunction to keep i bis wife from talking 1 F Mr Bonaparte of BalUm Baltimore re says he hel l bas as no use for the man who tries to I give on his grandfathers grandfather's reputation I i f f. 1 Its It's quite a distinction on sometimes to have had a granduncle RU f dv t A chair once owned by President President f Washington has been sold to the Mount fount Vernon association for 1 0 but a seat in New Yorks York's stock exchange ex ex- ex- ex exchange r change costs a good deal more Choose a a. freckled girl for a wife F says mays Dr Osler Osier Freckled girls ar are I Invariably more amiable And the they never liever get old enough to be chloroformed chloro- chloro i formed ormed the doctor might have hav said S 'S t y A New York man has asked the police po po- lice dice to help him find his year 16 piece who is missing from her home send nd nd as she is six fix ix feet feat tall talI the police pollee Keel feel that they have haTe some Bome prospect of f success access |