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Show ea.d The Advertising Sold a rtMKtvc liwnatac that iritkji hn yon driajMper, hington Star ,? is the Weather Report A NEWSPAPER WITH INTESTINAL FORTITUDE VOL. I NO. 1 Published in WASHINGTON COUNTY, UTAH-- B. f.l RAIN OR SNOW Hdl Fine for lie Fanm for Ac City Folks. Thank God Owcaa is warn Put President. L WiU Stickum, Publisher, Editor, Advertising Manager JANUARY 20, 193$ T- - So Far as We hi Utah Are Con--' cemedthe Senator Has Been So People May Know Dead for Some 16 Years AmonHis Colleagues the Senator Is Considered a Most Agile Politician By die Editor r Duke of Kaysville Enters Plea of Non Compos Mentis but Is Overruled by Court Executive Clemency Is Expected as it Is Well Known in Republican Circles that Duke has Been Out for Blood TEN POINT PLAN Under the New XYZ Act Approved by Congress ex-Senat- or i In publishing this our first paper it is no more than fair that we should state our policy, political we are not Socialictic. Washington law schools ever had. ambi-so- n The Duke is often seen with his friend Charles the Fifth K. Saxton. blue-bloode- VERSE OF THE WEEK PERSONALS a strad- dling the fence while keeping one ear to the ground, and divides his time between running for office and running for cover. He is second only to Reed Smoot as being the best senator from Utah, or any other state, that the Georgetown and Geoige We are not Republicans FIRST ! Found Guilty Copy Right . He has mastered the difficult feat of Clyde Epperson because the Republicans are not in power son we are not Socialists. and for the same rea- d PEAR BLOSSOM SCHONIAN of the Record at Du- - hii subscriber panes on. add the unpaid eobscriptkm to the funeral charger which mate it a r f femd claim. .... SECOND We will not accept advertising of liquor, light wines, beer or tobacco if and when any JONES FLEES IN HOUSE BOAT of this of over davs accounts. type advertjyjnecomes sixty .jelinq The sppltittaa ewetrhss hd easpsat payn;ent ofjheiadyertising r Gals in Hunt Side and twisted it is. with the THIRD Our editorial be controlled will dictated or not to, ' policy by, any advertiser, creed, or pognarling years. litical organization, unless said party or parties use at least five hundred inches of advertising per year in It raises its houghs to the Heavens, Jones, better known to newspaper men as this publication. 'whining for rain Rain that rolls down blowsy clouds, (From Provo Herald) ufjnb ... e, FOURTH That it shall be the policy of this paper to charge for obituaries these notices are advertising of the rankest nature. WARNER BROS, of Spanish Fork The Talc of a Kiddies Heart Thnaq foe Ages seemingly like to be mistaken for those famous movie maggots of HolBy Alex RoOo lywood. . ' - KV'l' I - y e, HEN LAYS ODD EGG SIXTH That the editor feela that the state sales tax on newspapers Is fair and he is perfectly willing, in fact anxious, to pay said tax, providing the state tax commission will take same out in advertising SEVENTH Fake advertising of any nature will not be accepted unless cash accompanies the order. That all advertising, to tie set in news style, must be accompanied by cash. No checks, EIGHTH as it is against the federal laws. ' . I W r- NINTH Financial advertising of any sort will not be accepted until the editor disposes of sopie nt-tract- ive rV stocks that he himself has Deen struck with. ' TENTH That the above rules shall be strictly adhered to unless the United States Supreme Court declares same unconstitutional. - A LETTER FROM ALEX DUNN OF TOOELE, TO THE STAR Please publish the following figures and ask your readers what they think of them: 124,000,000 ' Population of the United States. . Eligible for 'Townsend Old-Ag- e : Pension" 50,000,000' That leaves only.... 74,000,000 .f Number of persons prohibited under ; ' child labor law and those working : for the government 60,000,000 That leaves only.... 14,000,000 ; Number of persons unemployed 13,999,998 Balance to produce nations goods.... 2 Just, you and I and Im damned near worn out! ' . . ' ' ? Lives of great men all remind us We can make our lives sublime, And departing leave behind us Footprints on the Sands of Time. Such are the Past Presidents of the U. S. P. A. I. E. Diehl Will R. Holmes Alex Dunn Jas. H. Wallis C. A. Epperson W. P. Epperson A. B. Gibson A. D. McGuire Dennis Wood J. L. Asbury. Karl S. Carlton Howard Jarvis Dr. M. Markus Frank Gaisford L. L. Taylor Chas. England J. A. Owens Honorary Life Members Grace A. Cooper Mr. and Mrs. Eugene Traughber Brigham City, Jan. 20 The entire city of Brigham is flocking to the honre of Will k. Holmes on the out skirts of this city, whew a small Plymouth Rock hen yesterday laid one of the most extraordinary eggs ever seen in foil part of the country. The hen that laid the egg is herself a curiosity. Frances, as she is called, was hatched with six other fowl, all of whom, excepting herself, were eagles. Frances when but a pullet started croaking instead of whistling as is the habit with most local hens. About three months ago she began to shed the blue and green feather markings of the Plymouth Rocks and turn ed almost pure white. Next the two small horns on her upper lip shrank away until they were hardly visible. Up till yesterday her rggs have been diamond shape as usual. Yesterdays egg is white and oval In shape. Next Monday it wilt' be placed on exhibition In the Eddy Drag Store calf bora along with the four-legg- ed here week before last GEM YEGGS BAG BIG LOOT Mayor Broke Vow to Her, Says Rick Victim A woman, giving her name as tha Razz, wav arrested early today by Patrolman Flunk, charged with having been drugged and robbed. She was found wandering In a dazed condition In the Duck Pond and on being clubadmitted that bed at the station-hous- e she had had a large sum of money and a quantity of valuable arms on her person earlier in the day out that some one had taken form from her after giving her a bunch of sponges to smell. One of her assailants, according to the woman, said that he was the Mayor and font he wanted to make her a dupty commissioner of playgrounds. Mayor Blank, on being called at his home early today, denied ever having made any such promise. The. woman is being held on a technical charge of sedition, pending an investigation by the authorities. - sure-in-h- ell m . nt pm , EDITORS NOTE LONELY HEARTS BLUB DAYS - ' 1- , ' In presenting this the first edition of this paper, we appreciate the fact that there is about $1,000,-00-0 worth of libel in these columns and if anybod y should get serious about it, we hasten to announce that the home is the mother-in-law- 's that the automobile is our wifes that our credit is so go ahead and :, above reproach, in fact no one has dared to give us any in the past four years sue u4, damn you, who cares. V ... ! FOR SALE Fonib he vImUm PflMtc tanracU... Good ImM My rtkod Mvcr faita. Saad "r Dear Lonesome Heart: Loneliness Is something I never had until I gave my boy friend the air last week. He used to be a nice kid. but lately he is I dont have to take getting fresh and no insults from --nobody. Is it my fault I live next door to a fire house; Any wsy, what right has he to ask me if 1 have pqt an old firemans hat? I would like to correspond with a nice looking newspaper editor. SUSIE. Mia. m dollar ia m Mcnairy. rtVSfXSJ AdVCFS EDITORS LISTEN II aay af yoa an caw troplaua, aatriaMay- - sal aw advice a I nined a Huk lata bar aa all tha Kill I kav tat risk! lapcd ar dope. Addnaa FUh. Trlhooc Taksw. knaryeown. 'W. WANTED AT ONCE-S- oar light aac lal eccapatka lor ay apart tiaa. Inal is Rll. data an lalcrlriy with paMJakiaa. aiaiaa. narkia aid poll playlep-Makava lull drtaib la lint kiln. Addnaa leha Flispairtck. Sural Baildias. ad a, WANTED Ideal aad aappratkaa to aaabk rootlaoe rairell la Itpiilalan with atm to of couity pobbaber. Adtirrss oc bi ftdtatc. Clyde Epprrsoa. Kaysville. Utah.Cflt a PERSONAL Bar be lor. cauidrrrd geof look- - CTkakT capahk of kviai h(ht woaaa. la than aay hopel All coaaialcatkaa coaadrrrd private. Aa willlaa to ciikaapc ahotostapha. Addnaa Aaoa Jtakiaa. Deieret Naan, hall Laha Oty. BOYS. SEE MB Gel ay beak aa "How t Na aell aull. It'a tha Mnape a Wile. atall they like. I aa the oripiaal "Bhw "if Beaed. Hava ay wib aa well trafoed aha will iaah ihraapk a kek la a doaphaal . . . if I ay the word. I take aa looUihMaa (na the araan. Ac hoar I bcaefly leonrf aad a kroatly dirpruitloa.dinky hoi ay wilr thrive, fr- MalHa. Sak Lake CUy. Ber- . . CLASSIFIED ADS - space in this publication. (Flctkmlzed frota the screen version of Charles Dickens's novel) Synopsis of Preceding Chapters: Oliver Twist the youthful hero of our yarn, is bora at a workhouse In historic England. Though he never has a chance to know the sacred inhe is entrustfluence of mother-loved at an early age to foe tender care of a nurse named Mrs. Thingummy. Things go on in this vein for some time, until foe child's ninth birthday, when he Is taken in hand by the beadle, Mr. Bumble, and set to work ' ' j1 r. hive. oakum from the old oakum ROSCQE C COX of foe Ephraim fi, Enterprise, has been gunnin' for yean-, Now go oa with the story; for one Nephi Christensen who evit.wu Oliver was in a quandary. - . him the Ephraim paper. . dendy sold He did not know how to face the We've ' wondered why said Nephi which confronted him probChristensen changed hk nsme, or at problems - Klems that would have baffled a fair Ji-- '.''.least doesn't like to let any one know than his, let it be added. V-Us name is Nephi. Here's little Hp maturer mind Oliver was hungry! Roscoe Nephi cm be found off . stood out dearly In the fact That i on second floor (front office) Trlb- muddled turmoil of Ideas which cloud;WTelegrm,L ed his thoughts us particles of mud of a crystal pooL EDITH M. NEILSON of foe Mag-n-a cloud foe fair waters He wanted food! Times and Garfield Leader has re And because Oliver Twist was foe wide publicity under foe hur li? reived who usually get what of ,eapHan of Youngest Woman Pub- -' type wantboyhe Intended to have it they kite In foe United States." Received he So grasped his little porridge offers. of marriage, capital and what bond foe to and, striding boldly up not Don't know much about foe old code, add. In a voice that marriage angle hot any further propo-sitia- genial that age- of capital please forward to rang through foe rafters of b the editor of foil neper. Pleare, Milter, tan me have turn moref the of MacKNIGHT YOUNG TO (To be continued under protest.) Helper Journal. If your ambitions of ' . V'V taking up law are still among your Tea Plaat le a Tree ambitions, would suggest you give special study to foe libel laws, 'cause The tea plant la really a tree and 1 it we continue to publish this papera left to Iteelf will grow to a height need were going to of 20 te 80 feet, but erlentlflc prun-- , 800,1 Uwy"' Injr keep It to an average of three This makea tha young leave A 2 . A OWENS, manager of the feet Provo Herald, wishes to announce and ahnnta mre compact and accea-alblThe plant are perennial and that he has recently added additional a ' '' I' : pages to his paper, in order that he the leave are picked every 10 or 12 V,; v.; can accept more liquor advertising. throughout the year. The The dun stuff sort of petered out day la determined by the part quality Christmas gosh time, before By hit buah that la picked. That tha of white enough Jbn. paper chosen from the buda and now, send it il We're the best liquor which la - If young state!' called floweryla tathe tip conMimlng county leave era Included It la orange peyou decide to hide your Identity.of koe.. 'Then aa auhnrdlnata In value, : the tab of cotae pekoe, loucbonf, congou and EF? mke i.- Association. No duat of again! hew ever you Johnny, had the wind tanken out of his the editor feeling that sails Friday, when his boat capsized, speeding around Black Rock. Johnny is missing, divorces) are of interest but the FLEES are still there. ' FIFTH' This editor also maintains that legal notices of all nature (except to the public as a whole and are news and these notices will be run FREE of any charge. "OLIVER TWIST S. D. PERRY, publisher of the Coalville Bee and the Morgan News, has been run out of more towns iq foe last 72 yean than any other man in foe state. He left Jackson Hide, , Wyoming, Just about the time that thieving was at its height He M appeared in Coalville, Utah, his next appearance was at Pioche, Ne- I .:v. vada then to Morgan now he s back In Coalville again. S. D. ad-K. "3 mits Its touch enough to be accused i',1 of cattle rustling' by Bwd, but when they start to prove it its time to J .. WAYNE ELDREDGE of the Oglike strumpets' tears. . den Standard ii expected to begin n Share of the Wealth Campaign during And I say to my heart "These are foe Abe GUmman'e abience In California. things that matter; Thii rircision followed hard on foe A field of young lettuces, stretching heels of the recent announcement font dean nft cool and wide: Abe's salary is $18,000 year. .We The fed of earth; and the smell of wonder if that's what he gets or If crisp, new thistles; that's what he thinks he's worfol that And foe weary plough-horsdreams by foe fireside.'' HERBERT MAW who admits he Harrison Merrill. Is foe only man In foe state that is both Maw and Pa. We think Pn should be spelled "paw." We don't The Greatest Fiction Story of know any man in foe state that also the Year!! luscious and prominent ... foMate - Sn aa. Thoaaa J. ATTENTION BUII Eatra. Zooal Baapl utaea. I ban the only aad oripiaal aethad ai wiaaiap ike kdkr. Oihrr faken an ad-- T ll' i kaow ike paac. Haa-dn- di at re fr react, ay rtethod la aon. I bar li'a worth aon. Write aa. aon fkaepa I arm (all. A lira dollar hill will harp yoa frre I row tralllr violafkaa. Addteia, Fraak Beckwith. ,.. Delta. Utah. WANTED Aa pond a aaa aa I aa aiooad he piiat akop. Mart he able to edit papal, wnp an - the allica. act aa the llaotype, aeh aetal.- aake ap the papn. hi the adi advertiaiap apace aa ike Opdea 5d all EiealMt. Mart be pood. Addnaa Aha Glaaaaaa. Opdea, Utah. S,,rd FOR SALE Yoa've heard dart old pap a( tofap!! ptaclll Sn aa. doo'l he bald. We have nvered ap aaay tkiapa la aar kara. Art Fleh la an ai aar hex coataoMta. Addnaa Nephi Ckriamara. Triban-Trlrpra- Makaup of Praciotti Stoat . six's king, .the ercrege precious stone Is not worth very much. Tire illnniond, for example. Is nothing more than pure carbon In a certain crystallzed form. Chem lcelly It le no dl.Torcnt from graphite nr inmpliiack. Tlie emctliyat le nothing more then e rryitnl of.coW ' orctl eund. Rublt and esiplitrfs ere virtually lilrntlral with tha eheop artinclal. abrasive known ee eorun-- v dum, owing their colon to tracee of ImpuiiticsL An emerald le noth, Ing more than a beryl of n rtlffseyt go Tribune, . Clipnilcally colorc-Chlca- j s' . . ; s' . V ; '1 .? ?3 |