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Show TRU T H. Kurns Kurners, Aug. 17, 1904. Mister Trooth: We are agane havin trubel at the Kurners. Tuttle en Hodgsun hav agane disruptid wun ov our meetins, en Jo iz in despare. It seems tew be neses-sar- y tew be curtinkooly sertiflyin to ROOSEVELT AND RYDALCH. Colonel Rydalch was, up to a few self. It grew upon him until he ot of so bad that he would often go in fr at years ago a very ardent member of the picture to comb his hair, thi the Democratic party. He was a howlit was his own reflection in the ing, rantankerous, and when he wanted to look rabid Democrat. He believed mirror, Colonel at RpGsevelt, many times was in a tariff for revenue and in the free observed standing in front of the and unlimited coinage of silver and r car- looking glass. 1. 16 He to of ratio at the gold After a time Bishop Wrathall of ried a small vignette of Andrew Jack-so- n Grantsville suggested to Colonel Ryaround with him all of the time dalch that two men so strongly reand read the life of Thomas Jefferson one Truth takes great pleasure this week in reproducing the very excellent portraits of Colonel Theodore Roosevelt, president of the United States of America, and Colonel John Grantsville, president of the senitrtrs good karactur. Jo adresis Rydalch, will Utah. It be noticed that neither us freqwcntly en sals the pepul ov of these portraits are labeled, so that before breakfast. About the time that Utah must be made tew believe that the average reader may have some Colonel Roosevelt was nominated for the sonitur iz a ripe skollar en a poldifficulty in discerning which is Col- the office of vice president, some one ish d gentilman. That it iz our dooty onel Roosevelt and which is Colonel sent a picture of the Rough Rider to tew krcate the impressyun that he iz Rydalch, but that is not our fault. Grantsville, and it was hung in the store, where everybody who a fluent speeker, a powerful man in The two portraits were turned over to Wongress, wun ov the pillars upon wich the grate paladeyum ov our liberties rests. Selah! ( i dont kno wat selah meens, en i kno Tom dont, so selah gose). We wer having wun ov our yoosyul meetins tew reseeve orders in instruk-shunJo had dilatid as above for a konsiderable length ov time en wuz sumwere about lastly wen old Tuttle rose en wantid tew kno if in the circular kollin attenshun tew the seniturs vast knolege menshun wood be made ov hiz grate diskovery ov the lie ov Alaska. Sed he Fer senturies this iland imposd upon us as a kontinent. we bot it az a kontinent, we platid it on our maps az a kontinent, 2 yeers ago, in a mlnin kamp Mister Kurns made the diskovry wich haz made him famus that it wuz not a kontinint, or Co-o- p s. part ov wun, only a meesly ile. Kon-gre- ss en our scientlflk sosieties haz falcd to properly oner our senitur fer makin this grate diskovry. It shood be named Kurns iland, en i move that Jo in hiz yoosyual glib manner koll the to make these pictures, and called was struck with the strong reattenshun. tew (this wen he isshoos hiz whenartist had finished them he could semblance Colonel Roosevelt bore to he next sirkular. not Colonel tell Roosevelt from Col- Colonel Rydalch. Comments were exITodgsun jumpid up be 4 old Ezybot onel Rydalch, nor Colonel Rydalch tensive and emphatic, and Colonel Rycood git his wits togethur en sekondid from When an dalch was the recipient of many comthe moshun. Jos got tew get sumbody artist Colonel Roosevelt. as did ours in this pliments because Colonel Roosevelt gets stuck, besides Ezybot tew preside, eny uther use of an ordinary looked like him. Shortly after the the whats case, man wod hav roold them oil out ov whose some editor, only knowledge of pic- picture was hung in the Co-oordur. tures of is ColSo one sent of a pen pictures, trying? portrait Jo wuz ekwal tew the okashun, sed we the matter leave our for readers. onel to Colonel Roosevelt Rydalch, he: Mister chareman, this meetin iz Either can be called or Roosevelt to which be caused he hung fn his not to take ilands ur kontinints into We we and dont care, preand Rydalch. Mis-tuit was then r sleeping apartment considerashun. It is tew set 4th sume Colonel or Roosevelt Colonel Colonel that Rydalch began to obKurns skolastlc attanements. will not serve the strong resemblance him The wich? Inkwired Tuttle. Old Ezy- Rydalch bot wuz awake this time en bringin his fist down he sed, No you dont darn you, your agin Kurns, sit down, yur out ov ordur, yure aliens wuz out ov ordur. Hodgsun then addid to the rumpus by movin that the address also inklude How often they disagree I Here comes a round faced, fat man with a small the diskovry by the senitur of the state Drbyf hete is a tall, slender man with a hin face, and he is wearing a big Cowof Boston. Be 4 Tuttle cood 2nd it, Jo boy hat. They dont go to the right store to buy Hats. Come here where you razed to a point of ordur, that tew creget the right style and the right prices. XXX New Fall Styles Are In. ate nu states without the konsent ov kongress wuz treeson. Ezybot deklard at wuns that ene point ov ordur rased ROWE & KELLY GO ONE PRICE by Jo wuz rite. PLAIN FIGURES Wot the nu cirkular will kontane i 132 MAIN STREET dont kno, but Jo haz a grate hed on him. He kin pull the wool ovur the ise ov peepul magniflsintly, en he wants tu urn hiz pa. umAAiummmAimmmmmmiiAni liimaamiiiiAiAmmAAmAiAii We are gone tew get rid ov Tuttle and Hodgsun if we hav tu tar en fether p, life-size- d THE MAN AND HIS HATI em. Yours fer cerkulars, JABEZ SPRINKLER. o Odorless Flowers. The majority of flowers have no perfume whatever. A chemist, who has for some time been making researches into the subject, declares that out of 4,110 varieties known and cultivated in Europe, scarcely 400 have any odor, and of these nearly fifty have an odor which is, if anything, disagreeable. o No Newspapers in Morocco. is the most important state that is absolutely without a Morocco newspaper. o I Kranich & Bach Pianos ARE STANDARDS I OF PERFECTION ,k-n- g another ought not tr at variance on political matters, sembling he nd he Colonel Rydalch began thinking matter over. Guided by the inspirations he received from looking at the picture, and in the mirror, Coir el Rydalch gradually brought himself to believe that a tariff for revenue yas wrong, and a tariff for protection was right. Having thus taken a position, Colonel Rydalch decided he could no longer remain with the Democratic party, and so he turned his back on the doctrines of his forefathers and united with the Republicans. Since that time Colonel Rydalch has grown better looking and more like Colonel Roosevelt every day. His worldly d, increased, possessions hav while still a bachelor, it is rumored that he intends getting married and that he has his eye on a ce .n ay lady over Tooele in St. John. Just as t on and another as he makes up his mind that he ;jan be happiest with one were tot her dear charmer out of the way, Colcpel Rydalch will pop the question. If Colonel Roosevelt is elected his fall, Colonel Rydalch will go to Washington to see the president inaugurated. It is hinted by his political enemies that he has a deep laid scheme in this, that he thinks he can mixed up with the president and inaugurated himself. That by . r slipping up alongside Colonel Ro velt, the chief justice will be at a to know which is which, and, n! finally wind up by inaugurating onel Rydalch. We regard this - a Democratic fabrication, because tir .ich Colonel with Ryd acquaintance teaches us to believe that he isnt that kind of a hairpin. good-lookin- g . -- o Judge Zane is by far in the lead for the Republican nomination for justice of the Supreme Court. Of cours ; he has the active hostility of Sen tor Kearns for reasons which are well known, and which are eminetly tr the' credit of Judge Zane. The opposition of Mr. Kearns, however, will rather aid than hinder! Judge Zanes ability, unswerving integrity and qualifications for the place are so well known and appreciated that to enlarge on them would be superfluous. , .. He will be nominated without any doubt. His only competitor is practically Attorney D. N. Straup, who is a lawyer of ability and integrity and were it not for the fact that he has so formidable an opponent as Judge Zane, Truth thinks he would receive the nomination. Mr. Straup is unfortunate in being connected, in a business way, with the Tribune and other .ventures of Senator Kearns, which gives the idea that the senator is pushing Straup in order to get control of a majority of the Supreme court, Which would be a scandalous, lamentable and disastrous thing. Truth does not think for a moment that Mr. be Influenced to swerve the path of rectitude in the sm? degree, but for the welfare of his didacy he is unfortunate in hrying had business relations with the senator. The only ebjection ever mentioned against Judge Zane is his age. The judge, however, is younger,, both mentally and physically, than most men twenty years his junior, counted by the computation of years. He Is a man whom the state should be proud to honor. pre-emine- nt : Daynes & Romney Piano Co. 40 Richards Street. Try the Shepard Co. on collections. glHIWtllHIWVihfTTTVmTHTiiiMTmnnllHlininifWHIHHnniinHHHltmfyHffmfn IM |