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Show TRUTH THE SENATOR AND COG. Truth Bureau, No. 41144 X. Street. (By Special Marconlgraph.) Washington, D. C., March 6. Cog, me bye, said the senator as he helped himself to the cold roast, me broke. Th apostils takseat th in a distingished body what en to th sayins av Clay, ear has given mesilf, Webster, Calhoun an a few others. Hes there, Cog, avick, an tis mesilf as has no hopes av his bein fired. Tis thrue, Cog, dear, that owld mon Burrows, av tinks he wiil be afther doin a few tings to th gorsoon, but as fer mesilf, well, its, all over. Theres only wan I get out slight bit av conso-lashu- n no is Im an that all longer th av it sinator frm th seenyor junyor, but satlittle but theres th state. Yerra, Beall. at at all isfaction in that, all anny-watoime av th cause I was it all an if th dislyal Rawlins did hear-r-r-r- ts Mi-chi-g- an, y, hdwld th title, sure twas an impty WftQi .ji.ji What makes it worse fer me, Cog, continued the .senator, taking some more beef, is that wid all th pains Ive taken to kape. me name before th public at home; what wid th hirin an th feein av. ivery newspaper mon' I cud get me clamps on; what wid a press burro, here wid th Doc at th head av it, this felly comes down here, bringing wid him th little chareman an widout spindin wan sint av money; widout diggin up a dollar av coin, gets his name in all th av th east, all th av th sout; all th1 ay th av th nort an all th wist, some av thim printin it in rid, others in. blue, an, may th .divil fly away wid th idiotors, sometimes twas in letthers' a fut long. Tis too bad, too ar-gani- zin pa-ape- pa-ape- pa-ape- pa-ape- rs rs rs rs . Arramusha, I tought on th day d whin th presinted his to me an I tuk thim an said I wud addriss th old gazabo what presides, in his behalf, th corryspondints here wud do somethin, but bad scran to all av thim, divil a worrud was said ixcipt that th credenshuls av th- distinguished ecclesiastlcus, whativer that handid in by Mr. manes was Kear-r-rn- s. Misther, think av that. Wirra, wirra, but to tink av a mon spinding as much as I did fer to be elicted an thin to be called Misther. Its a quare worruld, Cog, Alanna. Th common people an th rayporthers do be an unappreshiative lot sure. bad. pa-ape- la-a- - rs - JT Jl " Well, continued the senator, as he carved another hunk from the haunch, I hov to tell yez to be makin yer hay whilst th sun is shinin fer whin me time is out ye may hov to go haymak-i-n in airnest. Fer to tell yez th trut Cog- this is th way it luks to me. Whin me time is out an I go home Ill mate some warrum numbers back there, wid axes in their hans an theyll lay fer me. Ill be afther lookin round fer some material fer th repair av me topolitical fences an Ill get enough busy wid some minin deal; Ill hov no time fer to run agin; th' cares av a busy private life will summon me an, although Ill regret to lave th sarvice av th people. Ill be compelled to in arder to attind to me multifarous inthrists an Ill selict somewan fer th place I tink a good mon. Thin Cog theyll all jump on him wid bote feet. Theyll tromp th scaramouch inty th mud av political oblivyon, as th pote Thats phere I gets even. Ill pick out wan av these fellys whats been treadin on me coat tails an lay him out. Begorra its mesilf as is tinkin Ill sthand fer Orange Jay Saulsberry, or some av thim an watch th Marmons knock thim down an drag thim out. sa-ay- s. la-a- ds Jl Jl All is not yet lost, Cog, continued the senator, as he took some more of the cold out of the rare part, fer Im not goin to be a sinator only until th ind av me terrum, yet Ill be a power aftherwards, faith. Fer whiniver I wants to down a mon all 1 has to do is to get out an declare fer him an och hone, how th gang will wipe their fate on him. Ye remimber owld Sampson, him as pulled down th timple whin he was at th fancy driss ball wtih his eyes put out. He was a sthrong mon was this Sampson .an hild th heavy weight champeenship av all Judea; he was th felly what knocked out th boss av th Filisteen crowd an killed two hunerd lines in a single combat wid th jawbone av. a sinator. Well they hired th fellys wife to dope his tea an thin they cut n his hair an tuk him to th polis t out his eyes an worruked him on th chain gang fer siv-ryears. Wan night whin all.th nobs was at a gay gatherin, phere th wimmen was wearin dhrisses what had a Y cut before an behint, they sint for Sampson to do th cake walk fer thim. . He kem. He had to, poor divil, fer they had th come-alonon him an they pulled him in. But Sammy was a dead game sport, Cog, so he was. He found he had got his strengt back an whin they puts him next to th two posts what hild up th roof, which was made av stone, like out at th lake, he lays me own pla-ac- e howld av thim an whin all th half drissed wimmen rubbed up against him an the boozy men spit at him he just pulled down th shanty an, wir. ra, wirra, hie butchered dozens av thim. Av coorse he was kilt himsllf, but phat av that? He avined up, didnt he? Av coorse he did. Now dye knaw I like a man like thot. Wan whin hes carnered an bate to a stan still doesnt stop there, but just pulls down th worruks an lands somewan in th mahogany beside him. Thats phat Ill do. Theyll tink out there before I gets trough wid thim that Im th Sampson av th districk. al-tou- gh sta-shu- an-pu- al as-simb- led gs Jl Jl But avin wid that, Cog, said the senator, as he again assaulted the rump. Dye knaw Im not happy because th apostils seated an will ho doubt be makin speeches in his own th what make befure long. I .tought that behalf gether to just about Thin bars. av as cud kape him out untwas mesilf farmers calls a pair wid Ill get me; til such times as he wud hov to come whin I sees 'tis all aft to me an ax me to put me choulder to th wheel. Fer av theyd kipt him out a phile longer sure tis mesilf as cud . -- l)tlliam Carroll, ARCHITECT OtdtJl Ejlablhhad and Mojl accfijo 238 . Ai the City East Fourth South St. . A t TELEPHONE 1320 x. VWWWWWWWIWt hov arranged matthers wid him an wid th power av me own press behint me, an wid th pull I hov here, I cud hov said to him, Now Reed, me bye. come inty th camp, an he wud hov came. But sure now me chanst is gone. Hell worruk out his own savin. As I towld ye a phile ago ye an th Doc betther kape yer eyes out fer an opinin av some kind. Perhaps twould be well fer yez to take th civil service examinashun, an mebbe I can get yez in th Irrygashun departmint. And finishing the last of the beef, the senator started up to attend the extraordinary session, 7 CHATTER. (Being the personal opinions of the writer, and for which no one else is in any manner responsible.) It is scarcely fair, perhaps, to encroach upon the territory of the very, excellent young man who conducts the dramatic pages of this paper, but perhaps the time of the week and the attendant circumstances will serve as an excuse for an apparent violation of ethics. One week ago tms morning the Herald, under the amusement caption, contained the following: People who have never seen Nat Goodwin in The Cowboy and the Lady should not fail to see S. Miller Kent in the same play. They will find it a very As Teddy satisfactory production. Mr. Kent a North, gives high grade performance. The play is exceptionally well staged and is true to life to the last small detail, etc., etc., etc. Jl Jf Attracted by the notice alluded to, and remembering the fame of Goodwin, acquired from his good work in many other pieces, the writer went to see The Cowboy and the Lady. As a matter of fact, he saw neither. Not even a clever Imitation of either of the characters advertised. Of all the punk, profane, indecent, rotten, Inane affairs an audience ever sat under this lauded abortion takes the cake. The time is today, the place Colorado. It is to be hoped the play goes to Colorado and strikes some place where the fair fame of the Centennial state is dear to the hearts of the people. They may go to shooting, and if so, no jury on earth would ever convict; not even if the entire aggregation, headed by S. Miller Kent, was ruthlessly slaughtered. The first acts opens with the hero, this same Kent, adopting one Midge, . a wild-eye- d, wild-haire- y t .. . ,,W,. wild-voic- ed , - j'1 . d, mountain girl as his sister. Through all the piece there is nothing which would justify a man in any such action, to say nothing of a Harvard man. But let that pass. To make the action more binding, and'to avoid any unpleasant aftermath on the part of the father of the girl, the gang of alleged cowboys (although the scene is located away on top of the snowy range) go down the gulch and lynch the girls father. And through all the little succeeding acts this gentle thing, with one exception, never a regret at the passing of her dad. Having comfortably disposed of the venerable old party alluded to. this gay bunch of mountain mackerel aeree. under penalty of a fine 'Of two bits per cuss, to never swear in the girls presence, although from the post mortem remarks concerning his taking off she has never heard much else save profanity, and from that time on the play resembles Mary McLanes. celebrated work in this, that it reverberates, echoes and resounds with one The writer is succession of damns. indebted to Mr. John T. Larkin, who. as Dave, varied the monotony of this proianity by once or twice exclaiming What- the hell. This college man with the proprietress of & is in love hurdy gurdy house, who has a dissolute husband she is trying to shake. This lady also talks bass. She makes her debut on the stage as a cocktail mixer and builds a mess for the bunch in a lemonade shaker, an act1 which would have her burned at .the stake in any well regulated community, where the cocktail is reverenced for its medicinal qualities. After drinking' the output the madame starts home and in going down the mountain side falls over a cliff some steen hundred feet high. Here is the only thrilling part of the piece. Midge, slight and fraav five lumbering freaks gile, holds at of nature attired as men,1 while the college graduate runs down the trail a mile and fall? over the same cliff, overtaking the woman just in time to ; ex-ures- ses save her life. Actually overcame the laws of gravitation and attraction. She is brought back to camp on the shoulders of the crowd, carried in such a manner as to best show the natty pattern on her hosiery, while he comes In carrying his hat in the hand of an arm, afterward discovered to be broken. It wasnt much of a break, however, for he appeared at the function in the next act and waltzed around with Julia until his feet ached. Jl jl The next scene is laid in a dance hall and was evidently copied from one of those exclusive social functions given nightly by that eminent leader of society, Miss Katherine Hicks. In this act the husband of the dance hall woman is killed and S. Miller Kent is . unjustly accused of the offense, although it would not have been even a misdemeanor to have slaughtered the whole outfit. The last act represents his trial for the murder. The court held by his honor, Gus Kroeger, In its palmiest days, could never have held a candle to it. There is no other adjective to use in this connection, save that employed by a Chicago girl in describing her lunch, 1. e., fierce. Of course S. Miller Kent was acquitted, just at a' time, too, when we were all praying that he would be convicted and the balance of the band would destroy each other in an effort to see which should have the honor of putting him to death. jl jl This play is said to have been written by Clyde Fitch. Just what brand Clyde uses we have no idea, but it must beat any of the common, ordinary sort in use here. Because some of the dope sold even here In Salt Lake fixes a fellow so he thinks pretty thoughts once in a while; fixes him so his mind works occasionally without swearing; fixes him so that he doesnt want to lynch people or go to fandangoes all the time. Nat Goodwin is said to have played The Cowboy and the Lady once upon a time. It is easy to understand why he quit. He didnt want to take chances of being killed. Unless this collection hies back to the east there is no telling what may happen. They might strike time about pay day, and imagine what, the awful consequences might be. But on second thought let us pray that they may. For there isnt a single thought, line or sentiment-in the entire piece calculated to benefit humanity or to impart even the vestige of a useful lesson. It is such blays that degrade and lower the stage; it is such work that the pulpit thunders against, and with the effect that every one in certain circles believes the stage is a hothouse for sin. Who Lead-ville-so- me -- decould blame the claimed attending-performance for the first .time and seeing this one, for going, out and ever afterward hurling invective and anathema against all anti-theat- re a manner of theatricals? ' ' Jl Jl It is an outrage, too, that patrons of a theatre should be deluded into going and paying their good money to see and hear such a mess. The idea of a such stuff upon the critic perpetrating ! public. uuuimuuuuui THEODOSIUS BOTKIN. . ATTORNEY AND Koom 85 MM W. COUNSELOR-AT-LA- Central Blk. . W Halt LSXBUlty E: Seoond So. THMiMfiwfinwwpwnwwwfmwifwiHi M. P. IRAPNT. A. j. wbbbh WEBER ft BRAFFET, ATTOKHKYB AT LAW. , D . 127-8- 38 r. Walker Bldg. . Salt Laki Crrr. UTAH, |