OCR Text |
Show According to the plana of Prof. AlC. Albertson, president of tbe Electro-MagnetiRailway Construction company. New Yorkers are soon to see something In the way of dizzy speed over the rails that will make the Empire State Express and Twentieth Century Flyer look like local freights. The mere matter of eighty miles an hour will be comparatively so slow that the passengers are like-- bert c j i from a wreck. The wheels are to run on the rails, and tbm, to make sure that they cannot June the track, the magnets will run alont the No difference how under the rails. high is the rate of speed attained, Prof. Albertson says this mode of construction will effectually prevent the train from leaving the track. "The principle of the invention u so simple that even a layman siay and Twenty-sixt- h street. He has a miniature railroad there, on which he chases a toy train of one car and the queer-lookinmotor every day, in order to perfect the mechanism. Tbe Inventor says he can burn up the rails with It. and is really afraid to let it reach its maximum. Prof. Albertson says that he himself does not yet know the exact maximum of speed that his invention munity A Gentle Hint. Bargain-Counte- r Habits. Properly Designated. For two hours a fashionable lady Deacon Jones Your wife is of such "1 don't understand it. a happy disposition! "What? , kept the draper cxlilbitlug hla goods She acts as and at the end of that period she wen going to last for"Why. he'a got some trouble with though "Are you sure you his throat or hla tongue and ran ever. She has no thought as to what sweetly asked: the future may have in store for her. have shown me everything you have? hardly speak. Mr. liaekseat I "No. madam. said the draper. "That's not so unusual." she Why should have yet an old aecouut In my ledger No; but he insists that he bux trouble herself about what Is In store for her? I'll gladly show you. writers cramp. If It's at the bargain countHe did r.ot need to show any more. "Thai's ail right, too. He dictates er she'll find it fust enough. New Yorker. his at nr lex. Getting at the Facts. Him Miss Elderleigb looks like a POOR THING. woman a bn lisa suffered. Her Yes, poor girl; she has suffered a great deni because of her mistaken belief. Him Indeed! And what is her beto-da- lief? : Her hoc ly to ask the conductor what's detain- road will be one and eigbt-tentmiles in length and the rolling stock will be one little motor of the. Albert-eo- n patent and, at the most, three cars. There will be no necessity for more than a single train for, at the e lightning speed that the inventor sending it over the right of way, two trains would be cumbersome. Fifteen seconds will be the schedule time from terminal to terminal, if Prof. Albertson realizes his hopes. He aid yesterday that he had figured It all out and made his estimates of the peed with the little models be has in hla workshop at Eleventh avenue understand it," said the "I have given seven yean of my life to lta study and perfection The time is not far distant when ths railroad not only of this country but of every one In the civilized world, will be compelled to adopt the electro magnetic motor. It will revolutionize speed and reduce the cost of operation. "Although a speed of 400 or more mllea an hour sounds extravagant at the present. It is no more fabulous than the rate of speed attained today by fast trains appeared to the invent-ivworld forty or fifty years ago. "The short line is to be constructed chiefly for the purpose of demonstrating that under the proper conditions a phenomenal rate of speed may lie obtained with perfect safety. We expect to have the best engineers In the world here to see the initial testa. New York World. can attain, but is convinced that It can haul a train along a straight track at more than four hundred inilea an hour. The railroad between Midland Beach and South Beach la to be a sort of a toy elevated structure. The rails will rest on a steel framework eight feet above the ground. The object of this la to give tbe train what the inventor regards aa absolute lm- - pur-pose- ', A Leap-Yea- r Proposal. Harry Here is the newest conundrum: When la two an odd and lucky number? Celia You know I never can guess conundrums. Harry When two are made one. Celia Oh, Harry! Thla la eo sudden! Town Topics. One View of IL "So you put up the rent? Yes. Housekeeper Why is the milk so blue? Milkman Its de cow, mum. She'e been feclin blue an sad ever since th' calf died. PERILS FACED BY CREWS OF DESTROYERS "Put a destroyer into a rough ea," say Sir William White and the limit of speed she can make la what ahe can bear what the people on her can bear. speed la goTraveling at a ing at the rate of a little over thirty lour miles an hour. You can travel at .that speed In a railway train with comfort in fact, it la about the speed of the ordinary train. But Imagine a runaway horse dragging your carriage over a rough country road at thirty-fou- r 30-kn-ot mllea an hour and you get an idea of what It means to go thirty knots an hour in a torpedo boat. Good for the digestion, maybe, but rough on the uerrea; and If anything gives way, disaster complete and overwhelming. The average age of the commanders : the battleships in the Unlu-i- l States navy la about 57 years. In selecting officers to command torpedo boat it Is endeavored to get men of about SO lr under. Torpedo boats are the bucking broncho of the sea, and it takes i young man to ride them auccesa- fully. COOKERY IN ANCIENT TIME8. Views of Life. Merely an Inquiry. "Im very sorry, said the dear girl, "Ah, reck'n yo' aiu't got no good-nlx- a Yut your views of life are such that small hams Is yo'? asked Uncle I could never think of accepting them Mose. "How do you know we ain't. as my own. "Oh, that's all right, replied the Unde? queried the fresh grocery yonng man with an open-face- d smile, clerk. Ah, didnt say yo ain't said the "practice makes perfect, you know, and I may be able to satisfy you In old man. "Ah don' axed la yoT Whereupon he focused hie camera fa take. another view. avd proceeded A Hard 8truggle. "I called upon Miss Subbuba the other night and stayed until nqarly midnight." "I suppose you found It hard to tear yourself away? "Yes, but I did It, though. However, the bulldog kept my coattails. Disappointing. "Is he much of a boodlcr? Well, he falls just a little short of the desired result. "What do you consider tbe desired result "Being enough of a boodlcr to get caught and convicted." A View of a Torpedo-Boa- t Destroyer. She Can Dash Over the 8ea With the Speed of an Express Train. Her Engines are Usually 5,000 H. P., And Take Up Nearly the Whole Bulk of the Interior. aetting down put In yolks of egg, well beaten and do away the strain, and let the potage be standing, then arrange It in dishes, and plant therein Wonderful Concoctions Told of In Centuries Old Book. An old volume, the Noble Boke of flowera. Vmkry, ffor a Prynce Honaaolde or The Dreamer's Dream. my other Estatcly Houssolde,' writ-o- n about the year 1407, contains With many a furrowed trace of lifes d deep. many rare and curious recipes In use Here :t common face-- an aged man axl-efor p. not 30 years ago, only ordinary tl'.ioff Just whereon the iluxty way dishes, but those to be eaten on fast breaks. and fish days. It Is curious. In read- Amid i !ie drowse of day, a casual nap ha takes. ing this cookery hook, to find that vhero are the same birds, beasts and Only a poor old man; yet whanca. through all disguise fishes, tbe same courses, and some- Of yrnrx of lull and tan, ateal over hla times the samo names to dishes as in clns.'d ryes soft aa a kiss. which to tha a modern one; but although tho names Thesefai-are often the same the Ingredients A beauty impart anil a bllsa the youthtlme of the heart T and the preparation are very different blanche their mange For Instance, By magic race and bleat tha acars have annealed: was composed of lamprey, or other The been wave are all at rest; an inner contained custards their and fish, peace revealed. trace of lifes fresh pork mlr.ced small. Here is one That lendad each furrowed deep mon "To make book: the from A on childlike tender, this old man recipe grace asleep. amy. take and boll cows cream, and when It Is boiled set it aside and let It German Publications. cool; then take cow curds and press Of the 12,703 newspapers and perimt the whey; then bruise them in a mortar, and cast them In the pot to odicals published In Germany, more Put than 27 per cent are In other lanGie cream and boil together. thereto sugar, honey, and may hutier, guages than German, 9 per cent becolour It up with saffron, and in the ing In English alone. wlml-rretie- sun-gla- re wind-frette- TRAIT OF KING LUNALILO. i Dusky Monarch, When In Liquor, Would Use Only English Tongue. William N. Armstrong, who was atr torney-gencrunder King Kalakaua of Hawaii, has written an amusing monarch. He saye It is a singular trait of the Hawaiiana to avoid the use of English when sober, but when drunk to use It with much volubility. The kings Immediate predecessor on the throne, Lunalllo, when in liquor would often refuse to converse with his native relatives In the native language, but addressed them In English, and directed an interpreter to translate his speech; and, on the other hand, required a translation Into English of their conversation in Hawaiian. The kings remarkable memory furnished him with a considerable vocabulary of uncommon words; alcohol seemed to open that part of his brain where they were stored, especially when, like the moon, he wae at the third quarter and coming to the full. On one occasion the use of the words hlppodramatie performance secured to him the prestige of a learned man. Ideas,1' self-style- And an ocean? "When land doesnt surround water. IN T. CLAY Tggrt a FROM THE FRAMEWORK TO THE FINISHED Biggs What la that? I)lgg You never hear him getting off that old chestnut about the good dying young. DID HE KI88 HER? Misquoted. you said I Muggins I iindor-duuwas a fool the other day. Is tho d report true? Firkins No. I never said yon was a fool the otner day. merely said you had been a fool all the days of your 1 life. Escaped Through a Technicality. "Did your Mr. Rlchum refer to the subject of love and marriage?'' asked her confidential friend. If he "No. said the Vassar girl. had referred to it I should not have let him get away. Ho only allub-- to U." d Hit Anxiety. Is there darter from fire here?" "Oh, no. replied the hole! clerk. "We are well provided with lire escapes. I dont rare a liane about that. How are you five! for man escapes?" rour:-e-. Hcd Heard Them All. Agent Mh'I.iiu. rmild I sHl yon this book of fairy lilies? Xu: I've been marMrs. Miichwcd . habitant the !. STATUE What They Overlooked. Diggs There is at least one thing to be said In favor of the "oldest in- Not So Far Wrong. Experience Teaches. the more chi; Iren a couple have tV larc'r their doctor's bill herr.Hirs. "Not al a.l. Tho mum rl iMi.-have the likely tho ;:irci',t ; are to become alarmed at every I it tl thing. A low-price- What's the difference between a lake and an ocean? Ite a lake when land surrounds the water. Of i7ic.smw high-price- p Usual Way. said the humorist, have all gone up the flue." What are yon going to do about It? asked the snnko editor. "Smoke em out. replied the funny party, ns he proceeded to load his trusty pipe. My Was the result satisfactory? Well, If there la more satisfaction In having a flat vacant d than in having a one occupied, it was entirely satisfactory." Bound to Catch On. Inventor I should like to get you Nerve of Them. Interested in my fly paper. Mrs. Newlyrlcha Well, of all tha - Capitalist WhatImproved 'makes yon think Impudence! it will lie successful? Mr. Newlyrlche What la It. HanInventor Because each sheet is got nah? up to tmijate a bald head. London Mrs. Newlyrlche Them poor first Answers. cousins of yours have gone and got themselves the same identical ancesMatter of Size. tors that youve got! Barkeep See here, Guzzler, I wants you so ter remember one t'lng. Looking Out for Himself. Guzzler Will's dat? "Mister William, w'y dont you run Barkeep When youse ask for a fer president?" "puny" an' I pas over de bottle, youse ou tliiiik I'd make a good one? don't want ter take a "dray horse. "I dunnu 'bout dut. sub; I wnz only See? thlnkin' what I'd charge by de day ter vote fer sich a high office!" Atlanta Knew the Brand. Constitution. Won't you take a chance on this cake, Mr. No wed? asked the pretty Fought for Peace. act in girl who was doing the hold-uDoctor Did that medicine I gave a ehnrch-fal- r booth. you agree with your stomach? Not me. replied Newed, firmly. Patient Yes, finally, but it raised That's tbe cako my wife an awful row before It came to terras! tine. 80-kn- 3 As the Word Is Used Now. He (at art exhibition) And what is that pleture yonder that aeema to attract ao much attention? She That Is the Portrait of a Lady, by DAulier. lie It looks to me that he might have chosen a better subject for a than a cook or painting readily ing them. By July 1 Prof. Albertson plans to have in operation the first magnetic train the world has even aeen. His company la about to begin the construction of a railway between Midland Beach and South Beach. S. I. The That she could wear a Na on a No. 6 foot. He If I should kis you, would you scream? Sl.e Of course, but I'e got such a cold that scream very loud. ! I don't think I could His Impolite Query. Wary. Women r '.mu Mini ilio way to I.ady I l.avo rfiil.ir.g to give you, get on with a my poor man, but sumo cold is t give him plenty sure-of lliceiy looked n(jd." IN Hi," Kiiglit of the Road 'Scure me, answered Mr. Sirius Barmum, lint don't your sign say, Be- ker, Irritably, "why don't some of ware of tbe dog? them try it." Washington Star. Exchange. His Recording Angel. "Who was that stunning blonde you spoke 1o?" That's inv recording angel. and fairy talcs are a ried four t "Come again? Town Topics. chestnut with me. New Yorker. "My typewriter. n.-.t- Same Cld Things. see anything new out West in the of aniomnhllet.?" asked the first rliauffeiir. No," replied the other: 'Me same old chickens, pigs and things." Did you |