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Show Utah's character stimulates poetic debate As everyone knows, Utah has a character all of its own. The state's personality is attractive to some and adverse to others. We came across a poetic debate in the Utah State University student newspaper. The Statesman, on this subject, and we thought we would share the rhymes. The first poem was originally published in the University of Utah Chronicle. UTAH YOU FOUR OH UTAH. LETTER WORD Utah, your waters are blue as the sky Your deserts are boundless, your mountains are high. But Utah, of Utah, you four letter word Your customs and laws are completely absurd. r The church which you spoke of Armed robbers are many, and rapists abound While the cops are out shutting the cinemas down. For skin flicks so hellish, for porno obscene. Your streets are unsafe, but your morals are clean. Your motorists are all completely insane. They drive like the devil, come sleet, snow, or rain. Their eyes are dialated, they foam at the mouth As they charge through the traffic on 21st South. the time that old Brigham Admittedly, Utah's a four letter word. said, "This is the place." And founded the city on this But then, so are love, sexy, and bird desert place. He christened it Zion, the Land The number of letters has of the Saints. nothing to do With the issue which you adit Zion, but They might call dressed yourself to. heaven it ain't. Does not control Utah, ask Dr. Dan Jones. Our birthrate is really not so out of hand; We have the room in which to From Utah, your birth rate is almost four times the norm. Planned parenthood clinics are objects of scorn. You sponsor young marriages, shotgun or planned, Until your divorce rate is highest in the land. Utah, my transfer is coming up From Capitol Hill to the Fashion Place Mall fast. Is a fraction of Utah, most two of exile are over My years at last. definitely not all. In the part of the state which So, good-byUtah, you four call letter word. my home We have forests and lakes, and From faraway Denver, I'll flip is unknown. smog you the bird. You're right, our waters are blue as the sky, Our deserts are boundless, our mountains are high. think that Utah's a nice place to be, And I'm sure Robert Redford would have to agree. Salt Lake City can produce smog, it is true. This poem drew the following But nothing like your beloved response from Sue Batty. Denver can do. A year without seeing the mountains or stars, fate Will In to a "Utah four bring you back crawling, reply While all others are better off for ours. letter word." begging out of the state. you'll remember Utah as a worse - than - death fate, I'm glad that you're leaving our glorious state. When you're in Denver, remember this, too All Utah is flipping the bird back at you! Hill to the Fashion Place Mall Your smoggy skies hang like a funeral pall. Kennecott Copper may take a Capitol bow For if Jesus returned, he would suffocate now. Your liquor commission is going too far. Hard liquor can never be sold in a bar. So private clubs flourish and visitors sigh: Mini - bottles are what they'll remember us by. At I e The church tells the state, "Women ought to stay home," So fight equal rights, which would cause them to roam. The LDS woman rejoice in their in sarcastic tones expand. I If GLIMPSE of the Post lady from Kansas. Carrie has led a clean life. This cannot be said of Mother Jones, an erstwhile of Mottled The Mother Record of the notorious Kate friend fast Jones, Labor Agitator. of the one pioneer scarlet Flint, (From the Deseret News of of Salt Lake. women Saturday, April 30) Her life story as unearthed after investigation and which was Mother Jones, labor agitator by Poly Pry consists of printed from known of and leader, men, the following arraignment: Mary Maine to California, who during the past two weeks has been Harris born in Cork, Ireland, 60 of respectable making history in Carbon county, years ago, has been summoned by President parentage and good antecedents. Brought to New England at an John Mitchell of the United Mine age. People settled in early to to of come Workers America Maine. Educated in common the union headquarters at Ina country school dianapolis as soon as possible. school. Taught for several years. This news, which comes from Married a prosperous farmer, Price, would indicate that she is when widowed immediately and still in close touch with the herself with a labor allied a her $5 organization which pays movement then attracting atday, Sundays included, despite the in tention east, claiming that published reports to the contrary. When she stepped off the train she wanted to elevate the laboring and educationally Jones was classes, at Helper Mother going it alone. Opinions differ socially. as to the real reason of her visit to Mother Jones was know as Mother Harris, in May, 1889, when she leased a house on Market .St. in Denver. She made a specialty of midnight lunches and social card 75 YEARS AGO games, at which unlimited wealthy mining t gambling was indulged in. Caterecj entirely to the gang then in control of the city, county political machines and a few men. Four months after opening the house, hadover $15,000 on deposit in city banks. Had a friend at that time, called black - leg. He deserted her in September and went to New Mexico with an inmate of the house. After that Mother went further to the bad. Took to drink, and was arrested several times on the charge of drunkenness Mother Joqes, from the files of Detective the Pinkerton Agency and disorderly 'Be that as it may, the old adage, actions speak louder than can be applied to words, Mother Jones, possibly equally as well as to any notorious woman in history. Mother Like Carrie Nation, Jones dearly loves a dramatic entry. She is not so particular as to the gracefulness of her exits but above all the orchestra must play and red fire must be burned when she appears upon the stage. To compare Carrie Nation to Jones is somewhat Mother little stub - nosed the rough on I la i Jsl!x The danger of Washington nuclear war in the Middle East is increasing. This is the estimate of she Ir.d spent the $15,000 she had deposit in the bank only a few iiK.-tlore, and borrowed $2,500 from S.II. Engel, a loan broker, giving a chattel mortgage on the furniture in the house. In Dec., 1889 the furniture sold and the house closed. Mother Jones then became an inmate of the Minnie Hall House developments. By Nov. 15 - Began to associate with labor leaders and refromers at the time of the A.R.U. strike of 1894. Since then has kept pretty busy stirring things up. Has a record for never advocating peace, or arbitration but always being for strife and war. -- During the latter strike she placed herself at the head of 100 men, women and children, and started with them on a march to Oyster Bay to interview President Roosevelt and demand his intervention in behalf of the strikers. She held daily meetings along the route, solicited subscription for the maintenance of her party, and finally landed at Oyster Bay with a handful of her followers - but she did not see the president, and the expedition ended there. I intelligence sources who have been following the ominous have seen intelligence reports, for example, which allege that Libyan dictator Muammar Qddafi might test in the Libyan an atomic bon desert this sunv'T. Analysts at un Central InWe telligence (Hi innate its m WITH JOE SPEAR L conduct: Left her house to manage itself, and in a short time it became one of the typical dives of Market Street. r Utah. Those who believe in the woman and who sympathize with the alien element which has cost the states so much throughout the country aver that it was simply love for mankind, heartbroken mothers and hungry children that brought her to succor the downtrodden and comfort the oppressed. Others smile cynically and affirm that it was the love of notoriety and an inborn desire to stir up trouble which made her turn Utahwards when driven out of Colorado. 4ST Agency are ap- prehensive but skeptical. Yet Quaddafi sent an emissary to Peking in 1970 to ask the late premier Chou En- - Lai to sell Libya a nuclear weapon. And intelligence reports claim that Quaddafi has continued his attempts to purchase atomic weapons or the ingredients to produce them. Three years ago, the CIA revealed at a closed - door briefing that Israel already had nuclear weapons available for use. We have seen some of the secret cables that went back and forth between Washington and Tel Aviv over this leak. The Israelis complained bitterly about the leak. The Israeli foreign minister demanded to know why the CIA had put out the information. Then he told the American ambassador the report is not true. Last month, we spent two hours with Qaddafi in Libya. He ac cused the United States of helping Israel develop a nuclear arsenal. We know, he said, that there is no one to help Israel develop nuclear weapons except America. At the same time, he denied that Libya was trying to buy or build nuclear weapons. But our CIA sources claim that both the Israelis and the Arabs are eager to go nuclear. Pilot Poll: For weeks, we have been reporting on the danger of pilot fatigue. The rules regarding fatigue are alarmingly lax and have gone virtually unchanged since 1934. Yet government files are bulging with accident reports that list pilot fatigue as a factor. Some time ago, an alarmed pilot conducted an exhaustive private poll of airline crew members who flew around the world in 12 days. Two hundred thirty - seven crewmen answered the poll. We have seen the disturbing, unpublished findings. More than a third said they had observed unsafe situations in the cockpit. About 30 percent said fatigue affected the quality of their landings. Roughly half felt that tired crews had below normal coordination on approaches and landings. Almost 90 percent said they suffered insomnia because of the constant crossing of time zones. More than half the crew members -- suffered uncontrollable drowsiness in the cockpit sometimes during the trip. Sixty suffered percent auto -- hynopsis. That is, they were mesmerized into a hypnotic - like state from monotony and exhaustion. More than 80 percent of the fliers reported feeling tired and lazy a general fatigue. At least 20 percent experienced body aches, sinking spells and irritability. The airlines no longer operate this particular, around - the -- world flight. But the pilot in charge of the suevey claims the same problems show up on other flights, even domestic short hauls. Meanwhile, exhausted airline pilots continue to doze off in their cockpits. And federal officials snore at their desks. They seem unconvinced that pilot fatigue is a serious threat to air safety. corporation owes an additional $40 million for excess profits made on government contracts in 1969 and 1970. This doesnt even take into account the year 1973. Based on preliminary figures, the board determined, IBM may also owe Uncle Sam a refund for that year as well. The Renegotiation Board never got a chance to finish its IBM investigation. It was abolished last montn alter an intensive lobbying effort on Capitol Hill by defense industry representatives. Headlines and Footnotes: The Civil Aeronautics Board recently determined that the airlines were discriminaiting against friends and lovers with their special spouse fare. So the spouse fare was changed to a companion fare . . Ever wonder where your oil money goes? King Kahlid of Saudi Arabia recently spent $50 million of it when he purchased a custom-fitteBoeing 747 complete with wood paneled interior, a throne, paintings ana a small meaicai clinic wired for satellite communications There are 8,800 free parking spaces provided to . d Excess Profits: The In ternational Business Machines Corporation, better known as IBM, owes the U.S. Treasury at million. Thats the estimate, at least, contained in an internal memorandum of the now defunct Renegotiation Board. Apparently, in 1971 and 1972, IBM earned an extra $75 million in profits from defense contracts. There is also a possibility that the least I. $75 -- .... congressmen and their staff members on Capitol Hill. The taxpayers also pay 22 college students a total of $110,000 a year to move cars around all day so 3,300 automobiles can be assigned to every 2,200 spaces. |
