Show THE A Oemi-Effonth- Paper Devoted to Cents Scents ly Denso and Uonsensc ' VOL SALT LAKE CITY APRIL 15 1870 2 MB CmOltrS I ' : NO 4 I INDIGNATION MB CULLOM WAXES WROTH ON ASCERTAINING THAT AFTER ALL HIS LABORS IN CONGRESS HE DETERMINED AS TO TO SUPPRESS POLYGAMY HIS OWN’ POULTRY YARD IS RIPE WITH IT THE POLYGAMIC ROSTERS TO CULL 'EM OUT- - AND PROCEEDS AT ONCE TO MOST FOWL MURDER HE CAN’T STAND IT TO SEE SO MANY BILLS' PRESENTED IN FAVOR OF POLYGAMY WHEN HE HAS ONLY ONE BILL TO OPPOSE IT AND THAT ONE SO OFTEN FILED AND CUT DOWN THAT IT HE FORBIDS ANY HEN OR SET OF HENS : LAYING ANY EGG’ IN BEGINS TO LOSE ‘ITS POINT HE IS STRONG A REVENUE STAMP PROPERLY CANCELED: FIRST ATTACHING WITHUOT FUTURE LY IN FAVOR OF EXTERNAL INTERNAL AND ETERNAL TAXES AND WILL LAY HIS OWN EGGS' RATHER THAN SEE THE LAWS TRAMPLED UNDER FOOT BY ANY SUCH FO WL’PRO CEEDING S AS THE LOYAL DARKEY" SAID— HE “IS BOUND TO ’STAIN DE LAWS AND ON HAND FOR DE ’SPORT OB DE GUBERMENT” THE STORY OF THE BOY WHODIDN’T GRIEF BAD LITTLE COME TO ' BY MARK TWAIN to the pantry and slipped in there and helped himself to some jam’ and filled up the vessel with tar so that his mother would never know tfhe difference but all at once a terrible feeling didn't come over him and something didn't seem to whisper to him “Is it right to: disobey Isn't it sinful to do this? my mother?” Where lb bad little boys go who gobble up their good kind mother’s jam?’’ And then he didn’t kneeLdown all alone and promise never to be wicked any more and rise up wjtbV light happy heart and go and tell his mother all about it and beg her forgiveness and be blessed by her with tears of pride and thankfulness in her eyesL No this is the way with all 6thep bad boys in the books butithap-peneotherwise with this Jim strangely He eat that jam and said it enough was bully in his sinful vulgar way and he put' in the tar and said that was bully also and laughed and observed that the “old woman would get upland snort" when she found it and when she did find it out he denied knowing anything about it and she whipped him severely and he did the crying himself Everything about - Once there was a bad little boy whose name was Jim— though if you will notice you will find that bad little boys are nearly always called James in your Sunday School books It was very strange but it was true that this one was called Jim He didn't have any sick mother either —ivsick mother who was pious and had the consumption and would be glad to lie down in the grave and be at rest but for-thstrong love she bore her boy and the anxiety she felt that the world would be harsh and cold to him when she was There was n't 'any thing the matter gone with his mother— no consumption or anything of that kind She wasrather stout than otherwise arid she was not pious moreover she was not anxious 'oh Jim’s account She said?ithat :if he were to break his neck it wouldn't be much loss Once this bad little boy stole the key A d this boy was curious— everything turned out differently with him: from the way it does to the bad Jameses in the books i Once he climbed up in Farmer Acorn's apple tree to steal apples and the limb didn’t break and he didn't fall and break his arm and get torn by the farmer's great dog and then languish on a sick bed for weeks and repent and become Oh! no he stole as many apples good as he wanted and came ‘down all right: and he waa all ready for the dog too and knocked him endways with: a rock when-h- e came to tear him It was very strang e like it ever ‘happened in those mild little books with marble backs and with pictures in them of men with swallow-tailed coats and bats and pantaloons that are short in the legs arid women with' the waists of their dresses under their arms and no hoops' on Nothing like it in any of the Sunday Schoolbooks i:: Once he stole his teacher's penknife and when ne was afraid ifc would be found out and he would be whipped" he slipped it into George Wilson's cap— poor Widow Concluded ou lastpage - J |