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Show r THE DIXIE OWL TIIK ASCENT OF Til THIO HILL OF KM ES In going through the Wilderness of High School, Fair Student must pass the residence of English Teacher and receive instructions concern- ing the proper road to his final desthe lofty Plateau of Education. The path laid out by English Teacher is very long and difficult to travel. The steepest and most slippery part of this path lies on the Hill of Themes. Fair Student looked around carefully, but could find no other path; and after pondering awhile, he began to wend his weary way up the steep incline of the Hill of Themes. At the very outset Fair Student was confronted by several huge monsters, called Scattered Thoughts. It was necessary to overcome these in order to reach the next step, named Concentration. After a fierce struggle Fair Student quelled the hugh beasts and reached Concentration. The next obstacle to be passed was d a mass of rocks called the Expression of Ideas. As it was extremely painful to cross this rough piece of road without assistance, Fair Student looked around in the underbrush and found two men who said that they would help him over. These two men were Pronoun and As Fair Student was Antecedent. over carried the sharpest rocks being on the Pole of Clearness, Antecedent became lost from sight behind the large Rock of Obsecure Phraseology. The minute Antecedent became lost from sight, Pronoun became useless. He jumped about and let go of his end of the Pole of Clearness. In trying to locate Antecedent and get him and Pronoun to work harmoniously together again, Fair Students feet became extremely sore; but after much coaxing these two men consented to work, and Fair Student was soon safely across. He had no sooner overcome this difficulty than he was confronted b: another. Fair Student found that the steep climb had proved the Vocabulary Muscles of his legs to be inadequate, and in order to proceed at all, he must reinforce his legs with Webster Splints. This operation consumed much valuable time. During the next part of the journey Fair Student was troubled by four tacks in his shoes. These troub tination, sharp-pointe- lesome tacks were, Sentence Unity, Coherence, Punctuation, and ParaThese with the graph Structure. other misfortunes that had befallen Fair Student, made him very despondent, and when he came to the Cliff of Despair, he gave up and would go no farther. Soon he succumbed to the Sleep of Remorse. When Fair Student awoke the kind Angel of gave him some better equipment so that he could proceed on his journey. This equipment consisted of the Helmet of Ambition, the Breastplate of Appreciation, the Sword of Pluck, and the Sandals of Perseverance and Detei ruination. With his new armor, Fair Student was able to reach a side trail which led around the summit of the Hill of Themes; though from this trail he could not see the beautiful sunset on the Mountain Lake of Perfect Construction, yet he was able to proceed toward his goal over paths that were much less difficult to travel than those he had traveled thus far. When Fair Studnt reached this stage of his journey, his destination was in sight, he was inspired with new hope, everything seemed more promising, more encouraging, more worth while. Fair Student at last reached his Stick-to-it-ive-ne- ss the Plateau of Education and was permitted to mingle with others of his own kind, who also had succeeded. He had reached the culmination of happiness. He could see the lovely sights, hear the pleasant sounds, and take part in the Here, ascharming conversation. sociating with people who were educated, refined, and gentle, seeing the most beautiful sights that man could conceive of, hearing the enchanting music of the angels, and smelling the sweet fragiance of myriads of flowers. Fair Student soon forgot his long, tedious climb up the Hill of Themes and felt that he was amply repaid for his arduous labors. RECIPE FOR SUCCESS IX EXAMS Teachers Point of View cups good lessons sifted throughout the year. 1 cup review. V2 cup exercise in open air. 8 teaspoons good nights sleep. 3 teaspoons clean brain. Flavor to taste with steady nerve. Mix and sift lessons, exercise and Add good review and grind sleep. thoroughly. Flavor and put in bakBake from y2 to 2 hours ing tins. in steady, thoughtful, careful work. 4 Students Point of View cup learning throughout the year. teaspoons of review. 4 cups cramming. 1 evening before exams at the picture show. 1 visit to Pikes for Coco Cola. 1 cup of tears. Flavor with two teaspoons of fear. Mix and sift learning, review, picture show and Pikes. Slowly add mix tears. the Quickly cramming, grind by fits, pour into empty brain pans and BEAT IT. ! 5 CONVALESCENCE destination, - 20 At nine poor Tom was sick in bed, A towel was wrapped about his head. At ten the pain is somewhat less, But still he feels too ill to dress. Eleven, Thomas thinks that he May possibly get up for tea. He takes some nourishment at noon. At one he groans, and says, perhaps, He may be getting a relapse. Its wonderful, he says at two, What good fresh air will sometimes do. At three to see him slide down hill. You wouldnt know hed been so ill. N. B. This illness, Ive heard say, need not be feared on Saturday. It would be most lamentable if the good things of this world were rendMr. Campbell: What are you ered either more valuable or more drawing? lasting; for despicable as they alA locomotive. Wayne: ready are, too many are found eager Mr. Campbell: Why dont you to purchase them, even at the price of draw the cars, too? their souls! Cause the locomotive Wayne: draws the cars. Miss Snow: There is a great deal of difference in the coloring of a Society is now one polished horde, word. You girls are perfectly willformd of ' two mighty tribes, the ing to go to a ball" in an evening bores and bord. gown; but not in a night gown. |
