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Show A queue or not a queue; that Is the question In China. The family cat Is by no means safe In this season of rabbit stews. Girl arrested In Chicago claims she Is an aviator. The police say she Is flighty. The air on the top floor of New York's new 30-story hotel ought to be tolerably good. Any 111 wind carries orders to the manufacturer of storm doors at this season of the year. "Seedless lemons are developed by grafting." So are the kind sometimes handed to officeholders. Chicago Philanthropists are about to start a magazine for poets. It will be read chiefly by poets. Fifty-seven varieties of weather In 84 hours keep the average man guessing guess-ing and the doctors on the nil It should never be forgotten that American names look as funny to the Chines as their names look to us. People love the spectacular. Without With-out a long tail a comet would attract no more attention than the moon. Gum-chewing has been abolished In the navy. Now can the ghosts of Paul Jones, Decatur and Farragut re9t in peace. A doctor operating for appendicitis out a man open on the wrong side. He no doubt thought he was left-handed. left-handed. It may have been noticed that no aviators have been seen skylarking around since the hunting season opened. As It costs 5 cents to send a letter to China the revolution will not receive re-ceive as much advice as It might otherwise. The Harvard professor who claims that he is able to catch fish with noise probably did his experimenting with suckers. They talk of the eye kiss, the soul kiss and other modern Inventions, but what's the matter with the old-fashioned smack? A New York cook has been arrested for stealing a steak. Still his sentence oughtn't to be as severe as though he bad stolen an egg. The New York man who Is looking for a wife that doesn't wear rats, puffs or hobble skirts might not want her If he found her. Mice are being used by a Chicago woman scientist In the study of cancer. can-cer. Does she stand on the table to do her studying? St. Louis doctor's wife wants a divorce di-vorce because her husband never kisses kiss-es her except by mail. Evidently he Is afraid of microbes. So long as they are comfortable, women probably do not care how they look In the sublimated bathrobes they now wear on the street The prevailing manner of dressing women'B hair no longer has an excuse. ex-cuse. The hairdressers and wigmak-rs wigmak-rs declare It antiquated. ' Some of the beaver furs make a nature lover feel sad when he thinks of the poor muskrats that had to be slaughtered to make them. A bachelor who lived sixty-eight years In one New Jersey hotel leaves this message to young men: "Marry!" Some boys leave the farm with the expectation of studying law and going to congress, and others hope to become be-come phenomenal ball players. A London paper says the war In China may last for years. It will certainly cer-tainly take a long time to exhaust the available supply of victims. The higher education Is not a failure fail-ure after all, for the manager of a Kansas employment bureau says college col-lege students make the best farm hands. Aerial propellers are said to be used to move canal boats in France. We presume the propellers are trained train-ed to duck when any one yells "Low bridge!" Some people are natural born pessimists. pes-simists. A Kansan Is said to be deeply deep-ly grieved over the news that one of his relatives has left him a fortune. |