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Show Monday. January 28. 1980 THE HERALD. Prov Women Toda Quick Nubby Vest About Shoplifting By Judy Love Staying homein front ly ROCKY POMERANCE DEAR cur — I'm frantic! Under the shirts and underwear in my 13-year-old son's drawer, I foundalinet cheap costume jewelry, ball point oerstill in their display cards and a bunch of other ais tape thatthe boyis shoplifting How do I hanoSEAR READER — You must havea heart-totalk with your son. Immediately! Make him understand that he muststopstealing First of all, honest brings peace of mind. Seeo young shoplifters often graduate to big-league jeves. rat more and more lifters are getting caught. Merchants are sick tired of shoplifting losses and are pushing ing pprosecutions. DEAR CHIEF — We keep hearing ofthe millions of dollars in merchandise stolen annually by eee How much does this cost me as a conSOEAR READER — The retailing industry es=e that sails cost each family $150 a in “hidden tax. DEAR CHIEF —I get nervous when I drive through the centralcity. Is there anything I can do to protect myself? DEAR READER— Lockyour cardoors. Roll up your windows. Keep your carin gearat traffic signals and stop ayon well-lighted streets or expressways,if As an added precaution, place your purse in the glove artmentor on the floor underthe seat so that it is not a lure for criminals. DEAR CHIEF—I have read news stories about explosives mailed in letters. The prospect of receiving such a letter bomb is frightening — especially since I work for a company that does much ofits business abroad. Is there anything about these letters that should make one suspicious? DEAR READER— Letter bombsare usually airmailed from foreign countries in manila envelopes by membersof terrorist organizations. Look for an uneven distribution of weight in the center of the envelope above the address. The ex- take forever? DEAR READER — The dispatch time depen!s on many factors, including the numberof units in service, their distance from the scene and the emergency priority. Too often people demand an immediate response to the proverbial ‘‘cat in a tree’ situation, thus the numberofpolice cars available for legitimate emergencies. Another explanation is that seconds can seem like hours during an emergency. Single File: The Numbers Game By SUSAN DEITZ Dear Susan: I wastold yesterday that since 1 am now past 30 I should face the factthatI will never remarry and I should adjust my life acco! ly. I have been a single parent for some time and was seriously considering trying to establish a permanentrelationship rather than have casualaffairs. I feel things are a bit hopeless now. — Mrs. S.W., Albuquerque, N.M. Dear Mrs. S.W.: Whoever made that thoughtless — and inaccurate — remark should be crossed off oe list. Forever. Age is ment. And the numbers are squiggles, labels, nonsense. People who go by numbers in life are children. You are entering your most desirable phase: wise, experienced, with a firm idea of where you are going and what you wantfrom your life. That can’t be achieved until you have someyears behind you. At this point you know what you can offer and what you deserve. Settle for ele less. ee your child-care ‘can carve out a chunk oftthe future i weal exclusively: rem e, career, contributo society in some way. This is the developinn iecsta’ and yon ere voll aa our vay. Asa ent you have shown you are a capable, sigepre dof shousebold. ‘That's a greatdeal to offer in one person. As for casual affairs: I know too manycasualties of casual sex. Their scarsrun deep. Statistics: The U.S. Cas Bureau reports that are second marriages; six percent are third unions.‘From age 25 to 4 the number of divorced men who remarry is almost double that of divorced women. From age 45 to 64, mea remarry two and a half times moreoften than women in the samecate; The odds are against fem: T") they grow older. Each decade makes it more difficult to find a mate/companion. ‘That is the beauty of younger men/older women couplings, there are simply more available men. The choice is wider, and the potential for happiness good, providing the people involved are wise enough to handle awkward moments that may develop, or nase Seow. If you fan that a rome will bring insat joy, consider this: Dr. Paul Glick, ealet of the US. Census Bureau, has an thatif things continue as they are going, 40 percent :i second marriages will dissolve. jut you are not a statistic: your life in exceptional because it is yours. Use the opportunities that accumulate and open with added years,in the work you have chosen, in your church, your local groups, your family and your friendships,to bring a low of people and love. Stay open and receptive to all, married or single, for the added pleasure they can bring. Old and young,anyreligion, anyrace,all are people with the same needs emotions as you. By sharing and blending with them your life Ma be enriched, as will theirs. is your goal, set about achieving it. Hew! By not Urecily sees it, but instead grooming yourself wil every ¢oS then going out into the world and exper ing people and life. Lived that way, your snfe can’t possibly be anything less than fulfill A toast to re‘fulfillment. (Susan welcomesletters from readers and will print them whenever possible. For a personal reply, write to her in care of this newspaper and include a stamped,self-addressed envelope.) (c) 1980, Los Angeles Times Syndicate. City Station. New York. NY. l00i9 Ask for leaflet $544 and don't forget to you think. especially when you have a include your name, address and zip Opening theletter usually releases the firing pin to cause the explosion If you suspect the contents ofa letter, do not try to deactivate the bomb. Call the police department for a bombex DEAR CHIEF= lam a young womanattending college. Recently a ee was abducted outside the supermarket whereI shop. Howcan I protect myself so this will not happen to me? DEAR READER— Alwayspark ina well-lighted area where there is a greatdeal of pedesiriantrafic. Be sure to roll up your windows and lock your car, Before getting back into the car, check the front and back seats to make certain no one is hiding in the auto. Several young women have beenraj and killed by assailants who hid on the floor behind the front seat. DEAR READER— If you are certain your neighbor is to blame,tell him that he has been seen in the act. Also tell him that you would gladly have given him some wood if he had asked. But thatstealing is stealing whether it’s a wooden log or a gold box and that there are criminal laws that can be enforced. DEAR CHIEF — Why is it that sometimes a police car responds almost immediately to a call and then when you really needhelpit often seems to Toorder instructions, send 50 cents to Sutchin’ Time, P.O. Box 503, Radio % fun project to do You can break the ere. theReniaoutside my garage. of th sion set can be a lot more exc iting than pone system makes it thicker and more rigid DEAR CHIEF — Myneighbor has beentaking ink Women’s issues, food, fashion and home furnishings Ask The Police: Utan—Pa code mid-winter routine and sull stay tuned into your favorite show with KNIT KNACKS stories The nubbyvest, sized in small. medi even end to join at the shoulder seam um and large, is just right over turt attractive, smooth seam” somefun needleworking For example Dear Judy Love I amjust finishing a a sleeveless cardigan vest 1s a quickie Sweater and now | amready tobindoff you can whip up in an evening of and join the pieces. In the past I have watching medical dramas and police had little luck in making a smooth Any helpful hints on how to make an lenecks when teamed up with your ar KK It is so disappointing to spend hours on a carefully hand-knit item only to be unhappywiththeresult sweater without an additionaljacket A soft. textured, beige-tone weave is achieved with the use of Reynolds Chandail yarn (six to eight balls) and KK Jacksonville Fla favorite jeans or trousers. If it’s warm outside, wear the vest over a heavy because of a bulky seam. The usual method of binding off will leave you with a ridge of knitting regardless of one pair of Susan Bates No. 9 knitting the pattern you have followed on your needles. The cardigan is a fashion winner you can count on for many THIS SLEEVELESS cardiganvestis a quick needleworking project with the new nubby, textured look. piece. I recommenda method that will give you a scarcely noticeable seam seasons, and it will last andlast. It’s without a ridge. When you cometo the easycare is unbeatable — handwash- end of your shoulderpieces,divide the ing doesthetrick. sts. equally on two needles. Choices: Break Off By KarenBlaker, Ph.D. | MAYTAG like a father-daughterrelationship. —Or Jerry will find out. As possessive as you Sayheis, he will throw you out, beat you upor both. Neither of these outcomes seems very healthy. Perhaps you ought to ask yourself DEAR DR. BLAKER — I am a 23year-old woman who has beenliving with a very possessive guy for the past six years. I tried to break off with Jerry a few years ago whileI wasstill working. He why you can’t get out of this relation- ship without asking to get thrown out. It is also likely that by throwing yourself at Stan you would ruin his friendship with Jerry. That is a big responsibility to take on, especially since you are not sure whether your told me he would change anddid for about a week. Then he madethings very bad for me again. Hefinally caused meto lose my job, which I had enjoyed very much. I would like to work again, but he wouldn’t approve. So,I guess I'm stuck feelings for Stan stem from yourreally with nowhereto go. I really don’t want to be his housewife anymore. I hate it when he goes heing attracted to him or merely from his being the only man besides Jerry that you have spenttime with recently. out to havefun and excludes me. Also, I am attracted to his friend First, get a job. Establish your independencewhile youarestill living with Stan, who has been to our apartment several times. We joke together and Jerry. Then move out. If you are afraid to be on your own, have a lot in common. I would like to ask Stan out, but I'm you may want to set up housekeeping MAYTAG WASHERS, DRYERS and DISHWASHERS SALE PRICED (STARTS-ENDS DATES) with another young woman. The pointis that you will be able to afraid he would think poorly of me. He is kind ofshy. How can I attract and date Stan while keepingit from Jerry? DEAR READER — Forgetit. Your think more clearly about a new boy- wrongquestion. friend if you are free from your old one. Once your relationship with Jerry is really over, you can approach anyone who seemsinteresting. Youwill be free Instead of worrying about how to attract another man, concentrate on and dating again. I realize that your situation may be problem is that you are asking the getting out of your current relationship. If you don't leave Jerry now, one of twothingsis likely to happen: —Youwill find yourself living with a man who supports you while you date other men. That would be something more complicated than you described in yourletter. Feel free to send me more details. I want to help you with this problem because I think it may reveal a deeper problem of dependence yn men. (NEWSPAPER ENTERPRISEASSN.) 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