OCR Text |
Show f --asasssasassrrt Acini' t0 PlobTrinUP I thorough V5 fj' 1 be J.a? C3 run ,I?DK section, audqwWj. price in Ji? jHWork Seu4 your IjjjssaaaasassaasHaS. ini a k&. Mai3iwalu3 SPANISH FORK, UTAH, SATURDAY MORNING, DECEMBER r;0L J, CREER, Fllll AXD NoTART Slain Street , Office, i 3iu EPITQ1VIYISIVI5 T Scissored and Sifted Down for Our Readers. Fork, ORIGINALITIES and SURGEON, UySIClAN IN rT"J' ' crisp! Daughter I don't boo how I'm to blame. The fire was too hot, I suppose. Father And why didnt you look out ' that the fire wasnt too hot? man The attended Daughter always to that at the school, and Mrs. Mixter used to do the basting. All we did was to do the tasting after the meat was ' cooked. Boston Transcript. . RtEf. or night. Cojack House. Ijallcalls day Office at Cooking School Cools Father As you have had three terras St the cooking school, Jane, I supposed youd know how to roast a piece of beef better than this. Why, its burned to a ' JIENERA.Y, M. D. Utah, Items of Interf.t Culled, Clipped and Be Must liars Boan Drunk. Cleaned From Varione enre u I . Husband Whats the matter with to the Time of Go Inf W. Kkxward (fiBKIR. to Tress. darling this morning? Wife You know well enough whata 1NER& KEN WARD, the matter, You came home druulc iFork, Iu again last night "Me drunk last night? Neverl Silver, $5c: lead, $3, 70c. "Cut you owned up that you had Ofia Rome, Union Block, Jay Gould's family deny that j;s is been drinking." "I did, eh? Well, you cant believe Utah dangerously il . , . half what a man says when hes full. Army officers fear an Indian uprising S Texas Siftings. in Indian Territory . SHORES!. D., Frsgront Flowers. Senator Gibsoq of New Orleans is d ap of Florist Here, take this cart-loa- d SCBOEOX. Hot at ASD PHWCIAN geruusly ill Springs, Ark. flowers to the Uighstyle opera house, American monetary delegatee believe New Man Yessir, What shall I Rothschild's proposals will be accepted . nil all Calh, Day or Night, "Unload em at the front entrance, ! estimated that the sugar crop and give em to the ushers to present to It Utah this year will be 23 per cent smaller the prima donna after the curtain (alls On the third act, than in 1891. Yessir. of the Treseury Fairchild "Then reload 'em at the stage door IFORNIA BAKERY Is said to have been offered hi, old portand bring em back again. Good folio. News. read, Pics, Cakes, and Bakers ' Robbers lisld up a Great Northern Her Only Hope. Fresh made Daily. rfiKtiuoery train near Malta, Mont., yesterday, and you know, Miss Paleontology, Wedding and Birthday secured (35, said the professor, who had Laura, Cakos a Specialty. lingered till the hands of the clock Dr. 8cntt, President Harrisons father-in-laLawrence Johnson, Propr. to 11:15, "is my specialty. It died at the White House yesterday, pointed Utah . Fork, for one to make a reis necessary only 93 aged years. mark about paleontology to get me Aitobsevs per lr. iet ft; a r Pfff-p?- at-La- 3 d r ms each lent lli i GASH, at Lav National Bank Block. 15, Utah BAILEY, A Land axd Mixing Pen tic. Attornet. promptly Mineral Applications strut and for all Agricultural is. Makes Slaps, Tracings all kinds Articles A Deeds. Draws of agreements. of Incorporation, Searches titles, ctmna for Pensions, etc., etc. 41,1! 1280, Fttik.eiV. me of Frt: at the k d itt'irs i ij otutf t Goods and Notions, iu Dry Latins Underwear, Boots. u'i and Children's Slipper. Dress Goods, Groceries, Tin-.etd m id LOIS CLARK. MRS. i i get. Store. cago a dirt eron li teat Purti' weejtitsk direct from fills first r bus1 ay ot tiicnai hoH Jkiesa m r ing tbc ;li lit hJ ten's so'it of West than I defy competition in d prices. Street, e eiatre bn line Jfull nil, (N"!" Clothing full lino of attachment -- ot "g Medilnes. 83tf) S ;t guld id t talliun, t stat'CA re $10 Gr.o. O. it. ea. a (lire nd-,- 1 "IU, under : iQil O an cut t. Morbi Cashier. 'Jan k-- plsyef s OF- -. Ccacbb Danish roitrc ELL0? TAL of 3, n liins t, nr J00'', tofk anJ .vr ter0.0 EtC t , - - $25,000 U.Bnell, John Jones 8, Thomu, Geo. O l,f1ri' fiAaoklatg tuiiuois. fftiga exchange bought iFQ, - f . UTAH to-da- bi JOHN, JONES, Suporintendsifi mmm wk --M Manufacturers pf 6mall Boy Nom. Doctor Filleo says the best time is in the morning, -Good News. A Modest Legislator. Interviewer I asked Assemblymat Seveneighths this afternoon whom h, thought the greatest paa in this couty try. Editor What did he say? Interviewer That that was a matte! Upon which his constituents were mors fcompetent to speak than himself.- NO. 27. , night MAINE Boots and Shoes, - Brooklyn Life. ..Pm O) jofiastut ijDojjud 8,31(9 )nq ejiAt oavc(d tuq.vv, y.o.f ;ma pjnOAX oaBBjd m quiqj aJ, a, :aaq poxB j pan doo jo3 aqs OS' '01(9 sacs ',oav, .iopjj pue doo ti2 aX in.iV, .nuucq j, aqs sXus ,ifBfj, aoccid ioX nanofi oX ,cn. :iaq paxu pun uib3b aaq tq .qcds j og qnq doo XBAA siq; 0TUBB8 stcax amco bb aqjcm og "aqs iupiJBAX 63B ,1 aaaqt hujuaAa $ Xca tuoq pun j.aoccid B j j bXbb oqa sXug ,aXy, toquBui ,t o; ,ui3nc3 aX oay, uaq paqsu j puB doo aqs bXbb ,aXy, .iapjs aq9 og puB doo 4;3 aX inAV :asa I Pa puoi 4 fiuo(B fiatqjBAx ssb( Xaauo poos I JBuioJ SB AX I SB puB tUOAX tOqUBtU I ssitn009 noXqooAxy,, ,,iaoq ;oom noX ptp aaaq,v 40s axoi ..jAXoaq a;jnb ..iORAX ,UB0p J flujUUda BSPi lOOAV anoX oqM Spopucm X(o;c( aa.noX icq) nqop jcoq i :aqq tq pjos puB puojjj jq Xq jauuc; b )om sqg P(o; bb ooa3 trj Xjoib 3uimohoj aq) y adoo jk o)ti aqt o boubjp oq) uj q-q- iaibi-uj-joi- GROCERIES. qacq ith ox, (DCMID, WJrj qjoj puB jaq )ae y nAvop iiof mi 9U1B9 Hardware, Clothing, Furniture, FancyNotions, Farming Implements, Roller Mill Flour, Grain, Etc. sj -- Blniis toopej p.UVy Set Baek. The misplacing of a single letter seems a trifling thing, but what a revo-tlo- n of meaning it may produce: A sign made of cardboard letters, hung on a wire in a furnishing store, announces to the public of Boston that tho establishment is Blanks Shirt Store. But the of the final word somehow slipped along toward the preceding word, and the passers-b- y were to read: Blank Shirts Tore. surprised Benefit of Bunking. George I say, Jack, change me a five, won't you? Jack I haven't more than enough for lunch and car faro la my pocket Foot la, I don't carry money loose in my pockets any more. I put it In the bank and pay by check. "I don't care to bother with checks. I always carry money In my pockets, and I never miss a cent" "Y a, but you are not married," --N. Y. Weekly. , et 1 tli4a time deposits. . Irt-lj- rn and Pit Guaran teedr ,$10. ibooT) l r1 It gnld i of samples of For Domestic Goods. rder on short notico. unship $25. Ar THOMAS, Tailor, -. " SrANisn Fork. . RENZO the SOLICIT' the East or are sold cheaper grinds Hrted d " las at all d One of tbe l'fi-n-. Advocate (to possible Juror1 Do you entertain any conscientioui about paleontology. Chicago Tribune. scruples against t'iie infliction of enpitai An Erabarreeslog Ml. take. punishment? Jack Chumpley made a curious mis? Possible Juror (confidently) Jobr He asked Ethel to forgive him Smith, sixty-tw- o years old last grass, take. for not calling oftencr, and she said: thank ye. Then he asked her to Certainly. Advocate (wrathfully) I did not ask she said: "Do. and him marry y onr name. Harry By which she meant ditto? Possible Juror (cheerfully) No, slri Jack So Chumpley thought, but It hain't read nuthiu about the case. seems that she had a cold in her head. Advocate (roaring) Are you deaf w N. Y. Herald. a fool? Possiblo Juror Youll haf to speak And That Would Never Da. I'm kinder hard o a litllo louder. MaJ. Murgatroyd My dear boy, pray bearin'. repress your spirits. Remember this Is Advocate Accepted! Puck. a very select ball. You must not wear, laugh boisterously or driuk too Aceommotlutuf. much champagne. Okie an of Irate Guest (to landlord Ponaonby But, major, if I behave homa hotel) You informed me that I myself like a gentleman people will might order whatever I liked for din me for a waiter. Smith, Gray & soup, salmon, take icr. I called for Co.s Monthly. chops, potato salad, a bottlo of wine, A Bad Hlffo. and the like, and the waiter brought me com bread and bacon. I Mrs. Do Flatte We must move away Landlord (cheerfully) Oh, that's nl" from here at once. Tho janitor Is desto perately in love with our daughter. right an regular, stranger. Wc like Mr. De Flatte My stars! How do you be accommodatin' an so wo let newan then know? comers order what they plea-Mrs. De Flatte Ever since she gradgivo 'cm Jest the same us the rest git. It'a no trouble fur the waiters to take uated and came home to livo be has their orders, an It makes the strangers been considerate and respectful. N. Y. feel kinder good while theyre waitin, Weekly, Jury, n Wanted to Be Sure. I beg your pardon," remarked amnn I'ttl r Tiki I'alll. It is a very discreet man who never on his way home at three a. ra.j "are you a policeman?" aays either tio much or too little, "Yes, sir," responded tho officer, conAt a business meeting the chairman fidently. announced: "Excuse me, continued the man, I "Brother Skinner submits his resig. nation as a member of tills society. wasnt sure, seeing . you were awake." Detroit Free Bret-sWhitt action shall bo taken upon UV 1 move you, sir, said one of the par How lie Won llerb llameutariatis present, "that the resigSlubcl Yet, I give you my hand with nation be accepted, und that n vote of my heart in it hunks Iks tendered to Brother Skinner," Jack You cannot do that I a) well Citizen, Mabel Why not? Jock Your ItHiul Is toodainttly small It Will Aitswsr All Purposesto hold such a large heart. Foreman Madame Sara Bernhardt That made the engagement Irrevoca is to be hero noxt week aud I wanted to ble. Harpers Bazar. pio-tuher of cut a could know if you get In I It. Act so that we can givo her a big send-of- f. the new plays dlJ Rllger Which Editor No use of going to so much yon go to see hi't uight tho three-ac- t farce or the Hve-i..rouble. You can use that patent medtragedy? IB ui! Leutiuu think. Was Rooiumut icine cut tho ono that says: "Before I drunk when 1 tvino in? taking." Judge "Yes, you w. iv. An Cnfelr Attack. "It must a boi n the five acter." N. Miss Dalscy Wont you take a chair, Y. Weekly. . Mr. Jones? . .rttk ? Jt Mr. Jones'Thunk you. It makes me 71. iiiima, the cat lira eatI!ov Little and here sit awing my fed young to en th: t seed 1 g..o to the a 'ary till. feet. n.o.1 il.ig. Young Rival I should think youd d nt ent b'rd act'd. M "a: in C: t havo to feci young to awing those feet . You rrj't he i d d liar per' Uatar. iiu'mn. It wns iu Little 1 !iy the bird. 'Good New. la tbe Tartu Widely (referring to rider) I see (i.K.ulil.lr. gw that our young friend Bobbin gtoa n. in.) -- John, have you three Wife (..t till sticks to tho saddle. J n on? uf Miss Bnapp Why, from his way of gotIla 'iiial Ns toy dear: I'm perfectly he riding, I should think you'd say that r. sob. still continued to bounce out of it- !V. if. ( iu i, Why, John, you're Texas Blftlngs. Im not shit. I ho;v U Got Tlmd. A N i ii ..l '."leKt.iHl. f Httdyard 1 the train running o -- .r M-n- d? Ci.i.hiy- - W!,... lime Fit'.'iHTl .(ii'u Ibmertt Jim Thom answeroi Crusty officer (who ha son. e It times that tame question ninety-nintii lay Row much did he at?".!.' 1 he last ten minutes) No, slrj Jula. unnlng on the rails. Light. ox-ta- il 8. Land office. Boom 200 Salt Lake City, Utah. 'it to U. Quoting the Doctors. You havent cleaned youj teeththis morning. Small Boy Doctor Pullem says tht time to clean teeth is at night. Mother But you never clean them a1 Mother 1892. Q, ' A Professional Opinion. Householder I am going to' trove t the suburbs next Monday, and I d Uk TYif. CfiEEB, Pretidenf you to do the job. Mover How many loads? "I dont know, You moved me once you may remember." Yes; I needed three wagons then U get through; but that was some yean ago." Have you moved since? Yes, indeed, half a dozen times." '' "Hum! I gufess one wagon will cony all Jou have left. N. Y. Weekly. The Economy of Politics. "Come off, said a ward politiclar angrily to an opponent, yourcandidati iont know the first principles of politi al economy.! !Dont he? was the hot retort "Well, all the samee, he paid fifty cent! for a vote this morning that your mat had been offering a dollar fojr( fort veek. petroit Free Press. a ax o$ poo3 8.HM u e.oqs pas post started and" And the young lady slowly, distinctly aqs sXbs ,paim t.uuop j, j sus ,ajA m aq o; and with emphasis made a remark "oqs Siva .ituqt Etnent Attorney a 8VN shine fifty-twfor 3.00. It shines readers faces every Saturday morning. Subscribe for it. THE n - n FOB- m UBI0B PA6IFI 6 SYSTEM TIMB CJLim ootxe onto SOUTH. XORTU No. I. No t No. 8. No. I. am. p m itatioxi. p. m. a. m. 4:25 7 :40Lf. Salt Lak.Af. 10:00 0:17 7:03 10:00 At. Bp. Fork, Lf. 7:151:47 9:10 11:69 Lr. Juab. D. E. Borjat, Oral Agvot, Balt ONLY $3.00 PER YEAR. |