OCR Text |
Show SAVED Kind FROM DREAD FATE. mm Woman's Assistance Meant Much to This Tramp. A certain lady, noted for her kind with heart and open hand, was approached AT THE DENTIST'S Her Choice. "Do you like utiort men t the bold or shy men?" She 1npp-i- i her i yen and noftly ald: "I'm Dure I favor Hymen " ShIiI "Do feu j;ivc gas here?" asked a wild looking man who rushed Into a dentist's. "We do" replied the dentist. "BoM it put a fellow to sleep?" "It does." "Sound asleep, so you ran bim up" t not long ago by a man wuo. with tragic air, began: "A man, madam, is often forced by the whip of hunger to many things from which his very soul shrinks and so it Is with me at this time. Unless, madam, in the name of pity, you give me assistance, I will be compelled to do something which I never before have done, which I would greatly dislike to do." Much impressed, the lady made haste to place In his hand a bill. As the man pocketed It with profuse thanks, she inquired: "And what is the dreadful thin? I have kept you from doing, my poor man?" "Work," was the brief and mourn ful reply. Harrier's Weekly. h- -: b-- l'r-f.-- .1 QUEER! wake Yes." "You could break his jaw or black hi.-tjns tad lie wouldn't feel It?" Il would know nothing about it." "How long does he sleep?" "The prophysical insensibility duced j inhaling the gas lasts a minute or probably a little less." "I expect that's long enough. Got It all ready for a fellow to take?" "Yes Take a seat In this chair ml show bm your tooth." five-doll- . WESTERN MEN Was: "What is the vocative of a cat?" cat!" The archbishop would smile then and say. "No. Puss, puss!" Youth's Companion. AN IGNORANT DOG. She I do so admire those officers. I don't He How strangi'! haw and can't understand er what there is haw to admire about them. They're just er men dressed up. Scraps. Philosophical Tip. Willi a how and a cheerful smile The Juggler of cups ami plutes ThiiH spake as he pocketed Ml fee: "All things come to him who waits.' Chicago Dally News. Next in Line. Clancy (with paper) Glory be! wondjier iv miracles'll iver cease? They've wirelessed th' air, weighed th' sowl an' now, bedad, they've th' breath! I wonder what they'll do nixt? Connoliy Faith, it ain't too much to predict that in a month er so they'll be radin' th' unwritten law! Puck. T photy-graphe- Sure Winner. What Is the plot in your new Brown (the other Ride of the fence) drama?" He's only playing. You know a "It has none." barking dog never bites. "But how can it succeed?" Jones Yes. 1 know it, but the "Hush. New idea. We're going to blooniin dog don't, I'll bet. let the audience guess on the plot at 50 cents a throw. They can't win. Can you beat it?" Milwaukee The Sad Side. "Tis for more blessed, so they say. To glv than to receive. 'Tik likewise more expensive, I've reason to believe. J udge. j First Small UNBOUNDED GENEROSITY. Revenge. I'm goln' ter git Square wid pa fer lickin' me Second Small Hoy How vor goln' Hoy ter-da- ter? First Small Hoy When de circus comes atollf I'm goin' ter say I don't care ter go. Judge. No Novice. asked her mother, "do you think Mr Sniggslcy has had experi ence in lovemaking?" "I noticed that he took pains whenever he tried to kisa me to arrange tt so that we could not be seen by anjr. one who might be peeping through the keyhole." Chicago Record TOO BUSY TO TALK. ES3 Handsome Pete Say, leddy, dis nickel you Just give me is lead. Philanthropic Miss Why, is It possible! Well, never mind, my poor man, you may keep it as a reward for your unusual honesty Chicago News Might Drop Dead. Oh, If I could only ttnd In my Inst summer's vest bill-We- ll, A musty old two-doll- you can guess the rem. Chicago Pally News. Now Stop! "What a cut tip he is. Isn't he?" "In what way?" "He woiks in a butcher shop." lwaukee Sentinel. Mi- TOO LATE Mistress How Is It I never hear any talk In the kitchen, Jane, when your young man visits you'' Jane Oh. ma'am, he's that modest that he does nothing but eat when he calls on me. All j An Observation. The man who has the softest snap fit's saying nothing rash) Is he who's almost always sure To have the most hard cash. Judge. Each After His Kind. Greenroome I've played to full houses, every night for a week, and a hand M Oreencloth And I've played hands, every night for a week, and never got a full house. Puck. Saving Hi. Life. Man la -- Hey! I'm drowning, Jump in and poll me out! Th. Man on the Pier I can't swim. Th Man I- n- Well, jump in and let me stand on you. o'i blithering UUotl Ha r We. Th. i'r A Ever since the early days, when D. Mills, J. B, Haggin and James K Keene "emigrated" from California to ew York, the metropolis lias been drawing largely on the west and south tor its supply of "men who do things ." l neodore 1J. hhont.-i- both a southerner and westerner, who has undertaken to solve New York's great transit problem, is the latest importation in response to the call of the east. The promptness with which Thos. F Ryan, of Virginia, turned the Equitable Life Assurance Society over to Uf policyholders, who now elect a majority of its Hoard of Directors, and divested himself of the control of the stock which he bought from Jas. H. Hyde, and the success of the new management of the Society under the direction of President Paul Morton, have created a dVmand for the strong men of the south and west that is greater than ever before. Under the Morton management the Equitable has made a better showing than any other insurance company in the way of improved methods, economies and increased returns to policyholders. E. H. Gary, head of the greatest corporation in the world the U. S. Steel Co. John W. Gates, Henry C. Frick Norman H. Ream, Wrn. H. Moore and Daniel G. Reid are other westerners who are among the biggest men in New York. Humming Birds In England. Considerable interest is excited by the humming birds now on view at the zoological garlens. Fifty-threof these tiny, fragile birds were taken on board from Venezuela; many died on the voyage, but the fittest survived, and 20 reached Regent's park alive. At the time of writing 17 are shown in two large glass cages Tarnished with flowering plants, and placed in the insect-house- , which can be kept at a high temperature. Moths In a cage near look bigger than these small birds. It is to be hoped (hat these dainty feathered gems may take kindly to their new surroundings, and live long to delight the eyes of many dwellers in smoky London. Westminster Gazette. e Manlike. Breathless, they stood at. last upon the towering Adirondack peak. "There," she said angrily, "we have climbed all this distance to admin the beauties of nature, and we left the gjass at home." Tranquilly smiling, he shifted the lunch basket to the other arm. "Never mind, dear," he said. "It won't hurt us. just this once, to drink out of the bottle." ' "Why De- O. How He Caught Them. Arohblsliop Whateley had a true sense o f graininer. says an old English mnti who remembers him. and delight ed to spring catch questions. One "Oh, NEW YORK. Brains of Mountain and Prairie in mand in the Financial Center. "Tooth nothing!" said the excited cnllc: beginning rapidly to remove his coat and vest. "I want you to pull porous piaster off my back." Generally the assured answer was. IN Perhaps He Was the One to Blame. Hicks He first met his wife when he was on a camping trip down in the Maine woods, but their marriage isn't happy. Wicks Ah, I soe. lie mistook ur for a dear. The Needy One say. old chap, me five for a day or could you two The Other One My dear fellow, the five I lend Is out at present, and I've several names dirvi for It when It comes hack Copyright: 1907: by Byron Williams. The End. little while ami all is ended The Ufe we live and Death A are blended' Our hate and love, on cycles waning. But follow on where Kate is reigning. Our striving, straining, laughing, weeping I'omplete, will find a kindred reaping! The gold we won or treasure hidden. Tie- love we gained or love unbidden. Our failure or success are blended And all is naught when Ufe is ended! - li. fore we came the world was throbbing. Was tilled with laughter and with sob- bing; Was warm with hope and love and gladness, With human woes and human sadness! And then we came to test the battle And try Its valor with our rattle And after us still will be ringing The changes that the years are bringing! But always Life and Death are blended-- A little while and all is ended! Couldn't SMALL SECRET. Understand the Taste His Customers, Two men were discussing the various food products now being supplied in such variety and abundance. One, a grocer, said, "I frequently try a package or so of any certain .n icle before offering it to my trade, and in that way sometimes form a different idea than my customers have. "For Instance, I thought I would try some Postum Food Coffee, to gee what reason there was for such a call fur It At breakfast 1 didn't like it and simper proved the same, so 1 naturally concluded that my taste was different from that of the customers who bought It right along. "A day or two after, I waited on a lady who was buying a pa. k age and told her I couldn't understand how one could fancy the taste of Postum. "'1 know Just what Is the matter,' she said, "you put the coffee l)( iier on the stove for just fifteen minutes, and ten minutes of that time It simmered, and perhaps five minutes it l,,iled; now If you will have it left to boll full tlfteen minutes after it commence! to boll, you will find a delicious Java-Ilbeverage, rich in food value of gluten and phosphates, so choice that you will never abandon It, particularly w hen you see the great gnln In health.' I Well. took another trial end sure enough I joined the Pos'um for good, and life seems worth living sine I have gotten rid of my old tlm stomach and kidney troubles." Postum Is no sort of medicine, but pure liquid food, and this. togeUMI with a relief from coffee worked the change. "There's a Reason " Read "The Road to Wollvllle" In pkgt. :',-,- RED PLYMOUTH The Utah mine contributed to the grand total of posted dividends for the past week by posting the usual dividend of 'i cents per share, or (3.000 in all. A company known as the Dietrich Milling company, and composed of Utahns, has a lease upon the old Comstock dumps, at Virginia City, Nevada, and affairs have just ben shaped correctly for an era of prosperity. Jesse Knight of Prove intends to become a coal operator and railroad man. He has acquired coal lands in L'intah county, i'tah, and within a few months will begin the construction of a railroad to the coal measures which he owus. After a period of nearly fifteen years of inactivity, the Detroit mining district, which lies about thirty miles northwest from Oasis, Utah, is again about to take on new life. The formation of the Detroit district is a counterpart of Tintic. Reports are current that F. Augustus Heinze Is connected with the Smelting company, just incorwith Jlu.ooo.OOO porated in Maine, capital. The new company, it is unsmellderstood, will build a 3,000-to- n er in the Salt Lake valley. Great excitement exists at Centennial, Wyoming, a lead of gold ore bear-'bsamples that run as high as J1.000 to the ton having been discovered west tf that place. The lead can be followed for seven miles, and in places the vein is 150 feet wide. A trench fourteen feet deep shows rich ore to the bottom. A New York woman who is prospecting In Nevada has determined to be comfortable, and to do so adopted male attire, wearing overalls, shirt and :i large straw hat. A woman with nerve enough to suffer the privations of a year among the mountains and deserts of Nevada certainly deserves to discover a bonanza. Our monthly The Iron Age says: blast furnace statistics show that the was 2,247,420 in June production 2,201,030 tens in May. tons, ag:-inJuly fltarts with twelve more stacks in blast than were in operation on the first day of June, and the outlook is that the production will be well maintained. Since the first of June the American Smelting & Refining company has cut the price of lead 55 cents per 100 pounds that is, the company has lowered the settling basis with the producer that much. Yet there is nothing to show that the metal is any more plentiful than it was a month or six months ago. Railroads and water are the two things most needed in the Lee, Nevada, district, but these are coming. It is stated that a twelve-incpipe line will be run into the camp by Rhyolite capitalists, and that a spur track from the main line of the Borax Smith railroad track will be run into the town and to the mines. In all probability business will be very quiet in Owyhee county, Idaho, after July 20. The 400 miners at Silver City and De Lamar have made a demand on the Trade Dollar and De Lamar Mining companies for an increase of 25 cents a day after July 20. The owners declare the limit has been reached in wages. Preparations are now being made at the Honerine at Stockton, Utah, shaft befor the sinking of a 200-folow the train tunnel level and ground will probably be broken within a few days. This shaft is to be equipped with hoist, pumps, etc., and every necessary precaution will be taken to see that nothing hinders the work, once it is under way. It is now planned by the Halaklula to begin breaking ore in August, to have a supply for beginning operations of the smelter by September 1, wnen it is expected to be ready to treat both Balaklala and Trinity ore. The tramway will he completed by that time and Manager Brown of the Trinity is said to have his property in shape to immediately begin produc- TWINE TAG Boar !n mint) that on each ball 1 :t K I TA(i with above piotm- We are sole agems of this the bt i ol grain blading twines. Here Is the proof you test it. 800 pound IM.YMOI TH KKU TAQ twlu equals 0 ,500 feet. Ordinary twine, which contains foreign weighing uuhstaDees, measures but UMBO feet. KKU TAQ saves you hviOU foet for every ;i0U pounds, and is free from lumpy and thin phMMM. Agents for Case Threshers. IBnffltM Itatn and Cooper Wagons. McCoi mick Machines etc. Write or call, ifactof y mrmsaud priOW. new-Miner- s skull and and a wreath, Bible, resting underneath And under all the line obtuse That bluntly questions: "WHAT'S THE USE?' A A cross-bone- The Fourth of July. Somehow the Fourth of July of today seems tame and insipid compared to the Fourths of our boyhood days. We suppose it is dyspepsia, or point of view, but, anyhow, we are honest when we casually remark on the utter shortcomings of the celebrations of Now, when we were a boy, there was Rill Sprunt. Hill was an old soldier with several good streaks in him, two of them being early vegetables and patriotism. William was the town cannonader. He made an annual canvass every July 3 to secure funds with which to buy powder for the village cannon, au awesome bit of ordnance that never faiied to lift up its thunderous voice when primed and rammed by William Sprunt! On the morning of July 4, along about the time ma was getting worried over Ettie and her beau in the hammock. Hill would lei er loose for the first time! "Room!" A detonation rent the air for miles, echoing and among the hills we knew and loved. The town folks turned over In bed and tried hard to go to sleep, realizing that Morpheus and Rill Sprunt were started on a battle royal! Then the town bad boys pulled the church bell ropes until the sextons had cataleptic fits, the factory whistle was tied open and the nigger-chase- r fire alarm joined General Sprunt in making a large pandemonium with calliope attachments. And biggest batrachian in all the puddle was William Sprunt. Charge after charge he fired, while early pedestrians gathered about and cheered our hero in his army clothes. All day long he held the fort, a powder-stained- . to-da- able-bodie- d noise-creatin- Hug-lovin- wor- shiped saver of his country. But, alas, as night came on and the noise died little by little of weariness. Bill Sprunt would steal away to where the adder lurked, to seek false patriotism in the stinging cup. Rate at night the veteran of the warring field was taken home, mute and as helpless as the town cannon, but he had done his duty well. Year after year he primed and fired the shot that sent the Fourth of July message around our little world. Others endeavored to steal in upon his honors by being wounded on the July field of battle, but triumphantly he held his own. Despite hfs lapses from sobriety's path, public sentiment accorded him a place of honor at the touch-holof the town cannon. He had his bad streaks, but when St. Peter needs a cannonader up above, we f, el sure that Hill Sprunt will wear a clown above his soldier's blue. Hut. anyhow, we know the Fourths of don't amount to much compared to those we celebrated when a e to-da- y A tc I liNCLEBY MINES AND MINING hoy. Rights of a Country Editor. According to the terms and conditions of the pass now In use we are privileged to walk on the right of way of the railroad, either in the center of the track or on tin ties outside the rails. We are further privileged tc take with us our wife, the devil and the office cat, if we wish. Frequent stopovers are also allowed and the amount of baggage allowed is only limited by our enduring qualities and our physical possibilities. During the first year of this arrangement the ties will be left as they are, the next year let us hope, they will be planked or put a little further apart, as they are a little close together to accommodate the stride of average newspaper met when in a hurry to go somewhere. P. D. Swlck. Weather Report. Flowers and bees ami sunny weathir. Blooms and breeze all mixed together This was the spring that made Its bowl Northers and snow and chilly air. Bluster and blow beyond compare This is the lemoa they hand us nowl Effects Boone lady grocer the other become so dear very much for (la) Newspaper. A the Weight. complained to her day that butter had that she didn't get two jiounds. Roone Vacation Time. After several weeks of strenuous life, the street sprinkler is taking a off this week - Dallas (Ohloi Her !.i aid. Consolidated Wagon & Machine g Gompany 1 Implement Dealers Utah and Idaho Georje T. Odell, General Manajer eallnj Hotuej at Salt LaK?, Ogdtn. Logan. Idaho Faltj and Piontpelier. Is Just as good as Diamonds the balance of our stock. We absolutely guarantee everything we sell or repair. It's your own fault if you are not satisfied. st h tion. North and east of North Platte river east central Wyoming is a broad, low. domal mountain mass, with ,i maximum height of about H.OOO feet above sea level, which is known as the Hartvllle uplift and which is sint ilar in many respects to the Rlnck Hills of South Dakota. Throughout this entire area copper is so widely distributed that, although no large deposit has yet been discovered, valuable beds of ore may at any time be found. From all indications and according to the statements of some of the most reliable mine owners and residents oi Julian and the hack country mining districts, an assay er and chemist named Howard has invented a new tTocess for extracting gold from gold hearing rock or quartz which seems destined to absolutely revolutionize uuartz mining, making mines which have heretofore been considered worthless and played out, of immense value, and Increasing the value of all ore by 'ahulous percentages, says the San Diego Union. The Secoma Mines company of Salt Rake filed articles of incorporation with the county clerk last week. The capital stock Is $'.oo.ooo. with shares at a par value of $ each. The com-nanowns a number of claims In the Lucln mining district. Box BHta county. Considerable excitement was caused at American Pork last week over the reported strike in the flolden Cup mining claim, at he head of Fort canyon, above Alpine It Is claimed H hitTge body of ore has been encountered that nssays $57 14 In lead silver and gold I,, 170 ST. SALT LAKE CITY. UTAH KNEW BETTER THAN City Youth Could There Was THAT. Believe Much a Limit. but The younger son of a politician of Chicago has spent pretty much all of his life in the big city by the lake, and, consequently, knows litof tle country ways and things. Not long ago he visited a man he had met in Chicago, and who maintains a big farm near Cairo, whither he had insisted the youngster come for a lengthy stay. One day the Chicago youth was wandering about the farm, closely examining the top, ends and sides of a certain trim, object fenced round in the paddock. "What are you searching for. Jimmy?" asked the owner of the place, with a quizzical smile "Where are the doors and windows?" asked Jimmy. "Doors and windows! WThy, Jimmy, that's a haystack. "Look here, old man," exclaimed Jimmy; "I may he only a green person from the city, but you can't bluff me that way. Hay doesn't grow in lumps like that! "Harper's well-know- well-mad- e Weekly. Toad as Assistant Gardener. inspection of a big, fat toad's stomach it was found to contain not less than 50 large grape vine worms, 55 potato bugs. 60 sowbugs, 40 angleworms, with, by way of seasoning, numerous flies and mosquitoes. Now multiply this, and I think you will appreciate the value of an army of toads on your premises, or any number required, according to the services that may reasonably be expected from one toad. Suburban By actual Life. Great Land Owner. The Duke of Northumberland Is the largest, land owner in England. His estates stretch almost from sea to sea. and he can ride 100 miles and not once leave his own domain. In appearance he is tall and thin, with reddish hair and flowing whiskers. He is in manner, and shows many of the attributes of a grand And he has all the pride seigneur. of the Percys and keeps up to the full their Olympian traditions. He was once heard to say: "You will have to go a long way back In our record to find a Percy who was either Idle or a In religion he is an spendthrift." like his father, and he has converted the duchess to his own e, Fishing Time. piscatorial equivocafor has the audacity to send me a sheepskin postcard made In the shape of a im11 fish, with a one cent stamp on its tall. I rinted on one side was this: "When telling about it don't let vour litttn fish turn into a whale." Of- course, an appeal to tne post office department will be made. This Is Uhrtmn matter. N. Y. Press. Some Tantalizing Metal rare metal which has attracted universal attention during the last two years, while before it was scarcely known outside of ome scientific laboratories, is tantalum, so named by Its discoverer . V.keiho-- ,.' .. ft. no account of the tantalizing difficulties experienced In extracting the metal from Its ores. Tantal (Jin id tnA hardest substances known, use for scientific lnatn,m...and its doubtless he developed in a very remarkable degree -E- ngineering Mana- A - aik. |