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Show r-- v- THE HELPER JOURNAL, HELPER. UTAH Our Pet Peere Will of Wheel. Freddie was giving his lady friend Along the Concrete a long discourse on his family bis m of Aufne IT and hard-workin- Humo tJShi u- ?- xO tory. "My Grandfather," he said, "was London Just a poor, clockmaker. When be died, a few years ago, he left all his estate, which consisted of 200 clocks, to my father." The girl smiled. "How interesting 1" she said. "It must have been real fun winding up his estate." Philadelphia Inquirer. Her Complaint A Fowl Reply Tm going straight down to the Hayes looked thoughtful to make a complaint," said "Tell me," he said, "is a chicken post office Freda pertly. two Is to It when eat big enough "Oh. darling," said her young man, weeks old?" "HI do It for yon. What Is it you Ills friend laughed. "Don't be absurd," he replied. "Of want?" "1 want to find out why they course it isn't" delivered that box of choco haven't Hayes gave him a friendly push. you promised you were going to "Then how does It live?" he asked. lates send me," she replied. Answers MagTell me that." azine. A Fait Worker Plutocrat (to young man asking for his daughter's hand) And have you said anything about this to my daughter? Would be Suitor Not yet, sir. Too see, It was only last night that I heard you had a daughter. London THE BOOB Opinion. e.Jr THE FEATHERHEADS i j I ?s f I ii I L. conb! 61AS THATS I fi) ii k SOKE THS GAKVEH I'M OK-O- M- J FROM MAKING I ' TM' TOP" MARNiM' To YeZ, MfZ. COLD BONDS jSKB KNOWS I PUT TAVS AND PAYS IN OtS . -thAY ves6TABL6 patch ;i kND I 'THiUk I'LL Go OUT AUD MSP6cT TUB FRUITS OF MY LABORS 1 how Come that WheaJ Vod tfitr FOR WOSS.MS To Votl Go FISMM(j-THA-T V J" Tr"J 5sJ. ISoU'T 6BT ALL LAMED BUT WHEN YOU LIP i.'.-A'- -- ll-- tc. S'i& OFFICERA II 111 wu. Jji. t rul- - ? f BONDS -- s is- FARM 'l VX J1' ' TVtr- GAKAGB TO Ot tlON'-- f MtV GOLD & WAWTS ME To HER. TO PRAVFER.S NSTBAC PRIve visit SOME RELATIVE S i Jh tDS i - , I jl'M AFRAID THEY JB THeM ARe I SwowiNff- - ANY 1 1 fW sisws of . Life A Woman's Driving License 11 UNNERSTAM' VJHV VeR wiFB HAVIN' VeZ PRtve TH' CAR, OP HIR.IH" A SHOWFBIS. IN? i '"' 7 . COMikKf-ALOU- i AJ?e Vou - 1, ALL. 3t " - - ten-acr- e Planted " i. - I i'i ww-..-. i Pi$mfa& Wii'A'&'St. 'i r ? e: 2?"? 1 -- IN TH' MARNIN - i r- k ) ifdj'j S ll?Jz?n FINNEY OF THE FORCE I - They're Buried-- Not i 'i r 7tojeix mowv Tub SHP COULPNT ENTOT Real Effort Farmer Thought you said you had field? plowed the Plowman No, I only said I was thinking about it The Stout One Yes, 1 spent the Farmer Oh, I see; you've merely entire evening telling hlra that he turned It over In your mind. bad a terrible reputation for kissing Wlier I Got It girls against their will. The Thin one And what did he Actor When 1 play "Othello' the do? Whole pit is bathed In tears. The Stout One He sat there like Explorer That's nothing. My last wireless speech on my North pole a boob and denied It trip was so realistic that most of the "steners are still In bed with colds. Big Thing. Doing Maid The furniture man Is here, ' ACCOMPLISHMENT ma'am. Mistress I'll see him Id a minute. Tell him to take a chajr. Maid 1 did, but hei started with the piano. Montreal '.Gazette. Alibi! t. "Why Is there never any cream on top of your milk?" "Well, we fill the bottles so full there ain't any room for cream." Passing Show (London), I i HACK SEAT PRJVIN(5- - VJiTH A CHALIFFPJR AT Ft I Explained Antique Dealer A rare piece. A revolver dating from Roman times. "Oh, no, 1 never talk scandal." "The Romans had no revolvers," "Tea, my dear, but you are a good "That Is why It is so rare." Stock, listener." holm Vart Hem. The Right Place "I've come from the employment Comeback r bureau, ma'am," said the girL "They (firmOvrner of New said you wanted a servant." ly) I wouldn't lend It to my own "But I do all the work myself," re- father. Would-BBorrower You're wise, plied the lady of the house. "Then the place will Just suit me." I know the old chap. Humorist Magazine. Over the Radio "Pardon rae, but doesn't madam WEAK LINK, TOO need the piano tuned?" not ours "I'm afraid that's you hear. You'd better call at the Broadcasting company 1" Humorist Magazine. Lawn-Mowe- ' S'MATTER POP e By C. M. PAYNE Some Things Excepted "Have Dickie?" Difficult u'll'r V yw T taw e kn uti( Iww-- y V V VVNj Mtxt No Hope you said your prayers "Yes, Mummie. I prayed for you and Daddle, but not for Uncle Reg, because I heard Daddle say he was past praying for!" And Then Some I "Think o' poor old 'Arry beln sent "Jack has pretty big ears. to jail I One o' the fastest working "Yes, they are so big that his head seems merely a connecting link beburglars in the game." "Ah, well, he's takln' his time tween them." now." Tit-B- it Magazine. THREE AT A TIME Face. Red? "'Ave you eaten the sandwiches, mum?" quit t, (hey! AMO COME PROM TOWH, COHSTABLE, WILES ? AND KERES A UOOU f. PLACE AS AWV TO TURN, THEM COOO OLD DOGS .i LOOS B WVZH IT turn niwe vrmr - By GEORGE STORM Far Away... The Hills And BOBBY THATCHER-O- ver were About 7 a jv" i GIVE 'EM A SHOWER op 'EM TO FusM keep rocks n OUTA THERE'-- ( "Yes." "Then I'll 'ave to clean the shoes with cream cheese." Everybody's. 1 BACK TO TOWl- - j A Wi.e Move "I thought you always frequented good clubs? How Is it I find yon In this doubtful place?" "My wife said that If I went to such places I could go alone." Z, y P'&A'- - . I'r" h. fc?. Defending Him "Why did you have to tel' your hear the stork lias been mother I kissed you?" making a trip to your house. "She's always saying you haven't Dadmoor A trip I Triplets. the nerve." Louisville Courier-Journa- PI i Unwed I l. C I J A , I ffTytfK H", r T- - I II I a f, On the Go Mother Helen is getting prettier, Control Curiosity don't you think so? Those who don't mind being Father Keally, my dear, 1 can.'t say. I must get up early some morn- rapped over the fingers, ask many questions. ing and meet her as she comes In. t. lie Eddie' Ear Is Out Of Step "KEEPING UP WITH THE JONESES' y ft VE GODS !! tDPiE Vmilu DRIVE HE fOUTS!! LlSTEM TD HIM MAUL1N3 THAT PIANO'.! ' 'Vn X . Tr. V" ,L II f fi BELIEVE MB, Eddie that's th' NO TIMS !i! way you're playino IT y rr- - T k T Ci') t: ) A - Hi V r KM y i I 9 yI . ' 'it' r i "fa - 4 J THERE'S KJCrTWlM& TO IT, AL, MY BO- Y- Better Gift If He I. Genuine orator can go on long "Bobby, I gave your teddy bear to through, and Is wel- a poor little boy who had no father." come to. "Why didn't you give him father?" A genuine after he Is MM .. ' 4 'Li |