Show I t to J KEMETT r J 11 i u I a MS MELISSA ABHORS A VOCAL VOL- VOL CANO Almost immediately after the street door closed Mrs tottered Into the room where her maternal maiden aunt Jane was sitting ng at a little little lit lit- tle tea table There she collapsed In Ina ina a a. gradual movement at atthe atthe the tho foot of a an easy chair allowing her head to droop weakly against its cushion cush ion Get up Melissa and dont don't make a fool Cool of yourself said Aunt Jane Tea give me tea murmured Mrs l faintly You might have had hadit it before it got gat cold If you had been a little more hospitable Aunt Jane remarked as she poured He didn't give me a chance to Invite invite in In- vite vito him said Mrs scrambling scrambling scrambling scram scram- bling to a more conventional posture He Ae was vas so much occupied with our pleasant little chat that I couldn't have interjected an invitation to partake partake partake par par- take of a glass of water Hes He's a great little monologue artist Mr licks Is Ill I'll bet you could use his for an elevator elevator cable cable and get past the inspector He certainly has a command 0 of language Aunt Jane agreed He hasn't any control of it said Mrs It runs away with him every time and the great trouble Is it never never gets any ny pl place ce in particular par par- Talk about speaking volumes That man mail will speak a congressional library during a morning call and never bat an eye If I had a dear little lap dog whose hind leg I had any regard fork for Id I'd certainly tie him up in the basement when call call- called ed My Iy own understanding understanding- Melissa said Aunt Jane reprovIngly Pardon me dearie derle said Mrs Mer Mer- plucking down her skirt It was careless of me I mean to say It passes my comprehension how any creature that hasn't a red beak and green feathers can make such a con a con conversational 1 n nuisance of ot himself Im I'm s j IIII I fib Ill ic If if li IA 1 1 l a I 1 Ule 1 4 Good Gracious Is It really as Late as That a 3 pretty fretty good single handed talker me when I get an intelligent and appreciative appreciative ap ap- appreciative I listener listener like like you dearie learie- earle- earle but Mr 1 could fill his mouth with nith hot mush and make me seem tongue If hed he'd only whistle once In hi a while hed he'd be so much better Well Veil observed Aunt Jane there ire are sonic some men who never have a hance fiance to say for themselves I doubt It replied Mrs T l When it comes conies to themselves they ire tre all more or orless less loquacious its it's when you try to switch to less in- in a subject that mat they ran rail back on 0 h grunts Women have wider con- con jernS ernS' They'll the discussion o 0 their husbands and the servant problem and infant cult culture re and ons at least Mr doesn't himself to anything how- how lye vel If Ir anybody started the of ichthyosaurs as a topic hed he'd tutt in and hold the floor indefinitely how bow it iuie c that he had jever devoted any time t to that branch If f information What did he lie talk about this after after- loon asked Aunt Jane I Mrs l cast her eyes up up- ward vard Let me see she began The weather leather first I think then other pre pre- and fortune telling and clair clair- and esoteric Buddhism and lir Isaacs From Isaacs to Oppen- Oppen lelm teim was a natural transition and stories carried him to i which embraced wireless ss and aeroplanes Then he to earth and automobiles n wide and fluent spirals and by way if country roads he arrived at bunga- bunga own owe and from bungalows to cottages end md from cottages to love Oh OIT ho fro said Aunt Jane rubbing ler ter sapient nose with her forefinger ix tad IDd d smiling I Ah ha Mrs 1 mimicked Yes he ho said that aft after r all aU It was love that made the world go round 1 I suggested that at times tImea It t was an Injudicious inJudicious In in- Injudicious judicious indulgence in cocktails and such but hut he didn't hear me because he was busy explaining his theory at length It seems that he had imagined several times Umes that he had been in I only to discover that it was wass a passing fancy and he thought it not improbable that marriages had been made on equally bas baseless less Foxy Drolly It was there he paused for the first time and gave memy mo me momy momy my opportunity I I love a good game of bridge whist I said and I love loye to to fish where you have to be very quiet and I lovo love the reading rooms in the public lIbraries libraries libraries li li- lI- lI and desert solitudes and dumb animals and watch cases and clams II Why clams says he Because they're happy l' l No No says I sweetly For another reason altogether He seemed a little bewildered and mechanically pulled out his watch Good gracious I I said Is it really as late as that o oNell Well Nell he be thought h he would have to tobe tobe tobe be going He didn't even ask about the watch case What was there about it inquired Inquired Aunt Jane Oh nothing but they're generally easy to shut up replied Mrs Mrs- Irs Irs' Merri Merri- wid Copyright 1913 by W. W G G. Chapman |