Show hi e l CU CUaba aba t War Debt Hangovers ANA MONICA CALIF S' S SANA SANTA In In summarizing governmental governmental govern govern- mental finance for the fis fiscal l year Secretary doesn't even list the thc thirteen thousand millions of dollars dollars owed to us by hY defaulting for for- nations But Americans at large wont won't If U you doubt t. t a this tills wait till o one e of these debtor coup coup- j coun-j V tI N- N I tries gets in a fresh I jam and turns toUncle toUncle to to- Uncle Sam for suc succor sc I r and tor-and and nd brother cor cor- cor r i 55 tIt v Y you ou can spell that 5 y last word the other other w r ry d y Sr way and md still be d A rIg right ht s We didn't know A J what we were get get- Irvin S. S Cobb tin ting into when we stuck V around too long after the the fighting ended In I 1918 Makes me think of a colored colored colored col col- col- col ored labor who went on on the loose at Brest on Armistice day A hard-boiled hard top sergeant rounded round round- ed them up Get to work on dem freight piles he commanded But de mess all done over declared de de- Glared a spokesman And us boys only enlisted fur de duration of de' de dewar dewar war Lissen I barked the sergeant de war may be over lak you specifies j but fur sich ez you de duration dura 1 tion aint hardly started i Woes of French Hotels IF F OVER the the woes of of the French resort hotels anybody c catches me sh shedding a tear it'll come out of an an eyedropper and not from the heart Im I'm thinking parti particularly particular ular- ular ly of the romantic and soulful Riviera Riviera Riviera Riv Riv- iera which under the surface is just as romantic as an adding machine machine ma ma- chine and soulful as a cash regis regis- ma-J ma ter There where E. E Phillips Oppen- Oppen hem once delighted to op and the Yankee suckers rushed in ready for their skinning skinning and and never disappointed is is the original home of the deft short change and the c overcharge There Ive I've seen many a mistake made in the bill and never yet one in in favor o of the customer Influenza Complications INCE the last bedside bulletin S SINCE so o many souls have inquired that I am offering a supplemental report on the work of the wrecking crew First I cracked an ear drum Cries of Whose Whose Then tl this s clinging California influenza moved slig slightly south by west within your correspondents correspondent's area So now Ive I've fallen into the hands of a throat specialist A fine f fellow but fellow but easily satisfied in the matter of entertainment His idea of a sprightly c conversation is isto isto isto to hold down my tongue with a spoon and have me say ah What I el claim im is when youve you've heard beard one Ah Ali youve you've heard em all But Buthe Buthe he be fairly hangs on my words Theres There's a a gleam in his eye I dont don't like Hes He's beginning to crave my tonsils Taking P Political al Sides Side DA DAY Y some entirely minded fair-minded patriot who is snuggled up close to the throne or hopes soon to be be proclaims Landon is as synthetic ic as a rubber duck Roosevelt is the only hope of an imperiled peo peo- What price a a constitution when we can have frank frankfurters Tomorrow another gentleman who likewise is as unbiased as a spite-fence spite bursts forth with s something some ome- thing like this Re elect Roosevelt and your country forever is wrecked Landon Landon Landon Lan Lan- don alone can an save our threatened institutions A real statesman He eats in the kitchen and hates to wear neckties Meanwhile Mr Roosevelt remains remains remains re re- re- re mains calm and seemingly dent Governor Landon remains calm and seemingly hopeful The Two Opposing Camps CampsON CimpsON N THE Republican side there O ON temporarily is a lulL Incredible ble though it sounds Col Theodore Roosevelt Jr is not getting ready to run for anything Later reports may change this Organizing the speaking bureau for the Democrats Chairman Rayburn Rayburn Rayburn Ray- Ray burn does not list among the chos dios- chosen en orators the name of his most distinguished fellow Texan I In Iii vaudeville it breeds a lau laugh h when the second half hall of the sketch makes the wrong answers but politics cs is I something else again Can it be that Uncle Jack Garner has become the Gracie Grade Allen of ot his sex Only they do GO let Gracie talk A writer who isn't taking sides wonders wonders' at len length th whether the homespun wearing suspender qualities qualities ties of ot Gov Landon can overbalance the melodious and limpid lines of President I t Roosevelt For this problem problem lem the appropriate musical accompaniment accompaniment accompaniment ac ac- ac- ac would seem to be Poat and arid Peasant IRVIN S. S COBB cap Cok Copyright I t. U Service j 1 ff if r |