Show I Iter he 11 W Wa a ter Wine Wi I n c BROADWAY I GOSSIP James Lanehart veteran ship news news reporter is guest contributor I tor today for Mr W WInchell now on vacation B By JAMES LANEHART A ship is like a robber Who Vho steals away at night night- His pockets filled with treasure His heels alive with fright I. I A ship is like a baggage I With banners bold and gay I Who Vho ho seeks with tales and promises promises prom prom- To carry you away New Yorks York's Miles 1 of Waterfront Front door of the world All Air the treasures of commerce come and go in the big ships and small which slide through ugh the narrows Little tramps from Sweden carrying carrying carrying carry carry- carry carry- ing reindeer meat and lumber Great liners from England and France with tons of oC gold beneath their ribs Everything happens on on the waterfront People who have lived and died without Phooey to Broadway The greatest greatest greatest great great- est port in in inthe the world can cast a fatal spell Definitions of a Ships News Reporter A man who rises with the lark on a drear and chilly morning the lark is still pounding his ear when some of us get up hurries to the battery and boards the U. U S. S c customs cutter to meet an incoming liner A celebrity hound A breakfast snapper of weighty statements statements statements state state- ments by great men The fellow fellow leI fel fel- fel low who listens while outgoing actresses unburden their souls about the skyline and American I men Disrupter of oC honey honey- moons Nuisance Cynic A Ship Com Conies Comes In InThe The Theold old cutter pounds down the bay breasting a heavy swell and driving mist inist Its It's cold and the seats are aro taken by influential guests who are meeting friends Some citizens will go down the theay bay ay to meet anybody just anybody justs to prove that they can do it We pull pun up along the side of ot a sea queen and a hatch is opened If It were we're lucky a gangplank gangplank gangplank gang gang- plank is let down I If were we're not a ladder is laid from ship to tr cutter and we lurch along it across a aspan aspan aspan span of hungry green waves that reach up for our pant legs With a ao passenger list in our hands we we scurry from cabin to cabin jn in search of our victims Actors Actors' are easiest although they like to play tag first If It we dont don't find them within a reasonable length of time they usually come came out of hiding Play producers arc are even easier asi r than that In all all' my years of ships news reporting I have never been able to overlook one Nor has any of ot them held out the name of his forthcoming production Cameramen get busy Pretty girls are lured on deck and coaxed coated to pose against a life preserver or ora ora ora a gangway with a hand raised in greeting We reporters usually syndicate syndicate syndicate syndi cate That means that while Iam I Iam Iam am chasing a visiting prince the theother theother theother other fellows are taking care of ot the lord mayor of ot London Mary McCormic the chairman of a senate investigating committee and his wife the captain he saw two whales on the crossing and Eugene Grace who though h he heard some war var talk in Europe believes that conditions show a a. steady upward tren trend Salle Salio de dc Mai 1 If its it's a French liner we meet below in the Salle de do Mal Mai or press cabin And there with the aid of line Une officials and strong drinks we pool our stories A ships ship's news story as given by reporter to re reporter reporter re- re porter sounds like this Now about this Count Jean de do Pretty well known in Paris Yeah parlor snake Says its it's a pleasure trip and has nothing nothing nothing noth noth- ing to do with his matrimonial plans but he ho neither affirms nor denies that he Is engaged to one of ot the Any Anyone one one- take your choice Expects to visit sit Southampton for lor the tennis matches and If he gets a bid hell he'll go to Newport 4 But when you see It in the newspapers newspapers newspapers news news- papers Among the passengers was dashing Count Jean de International in international In- In playboy who has been reported engaged to one of the Vanderbilt heiresses The count wearing English tweeds with a lavender shirt mauve tie and green spats answered answered answered an an- all questions concerning his matrimonial plans with a laughing denial he pleaded Non non please non please as reporters stormed his cabin It Itis Itis Itis is not for lor me to say this say this is it Non it is for the Iad lady Decidedly Decided Decided- ly She is most charming but II I cannot comment Now to the dining room for Cor a abig abig abig big breakfast and and some yarn swapping Fashion Ships It all depends on speed The fastest b boats ats get the first class crowds The Tho Rex Normandie Europa Bremen and Conte dl di Savoia Savola which make the crossing in less than five days carry the cream of trippers When a liner c can n make malte it in four Jour days shell she'll be bethe bethe bethe the queen of the seas for travelers travel travel- ers will wUl pay any price for passage on a fast last b boat at If It You Plan to Go Abroad Pay your fare Care It is no longer possible for young men to work their way across by tending cattle on fr freighters Too many of them jumped s snip ship i in Europe You Youcan Youcan Youcan can contribute a dime to the seamen's seamen's seamen's sea sea- mens men's fund go aboard and stow away But that may end In a a. British or French prison The simplest plan is to consult consulta a steamship agent buy your ticket and let him worry about pass passports passports ports visas Isas etc The ticket will cost no more maro than l If you bought it from the line Une r Waterfront Portrait An ancient man the last of ot the theold li old time stevedores crouched among crates on a Brooklyn pier in the moonlight and spitting Into I the black water gave vent to his feelings k Bali Bah These young fellers are aro all out of ot colleges an wear coonskin coon coon- co coonskin n- n skin coats coal an come rollin up to the docks in automobiles Soft Soft Soft- the lot of oC em Why theres there's signs up all over sayIn honesty is the best policy an drink sh shouldn't be a mans man's master An what lights fights Now its it's sos so's a Do woman kin walk walle through here alone lone an anbe anbe anbe be sales safes though she was as in Sunday Sun Sun- day school Bah Copyright 1935 Daily 1 Mirror inc ine of |