Show OF F INTEREST TO WOMEN b t E III Gi GIR I Ir 1 r AlIE r on Rear End of Car Cyr CarI Gets Line ine on ova Men lien That at Enables n Her HerTo I To 70 Know Right O One Ong e When She Sees mm Him 35 I Combating Grouches 7 aria and a Souses Easy but Women F Fare arc Beats Stump Her Hert t MO MOST MOST d T OF THEM CARRY CHIP CHIPa a ON SHOULDER i The Copyright 1919 by the Evening Telegram Telegram Tele Tele- gram New York Herald Company i- i r By Jane Dixon It Its It's s a pool war that doesn't shoot someone someone f one some good I took the Job of nursing nickels to replace a perfectly good American with a brogue so thick you could see seethe seethe seethe the s shamrocks ham roc k s sprouting all over It I t P Patrick a t rl ri c k me melad melad melad lad went to be a doughboy I x A I was so sorry to see him go but I Idid Idid It t did need the job At that I would w Willingly 1111 n g I y have traded places with him Being a soldier and marching away to strange countries to the tune of The Star- Star Spangled Banner played by a a. big brais brass band seems a a. lot more exciting than bumping back and forth over the sar same e old lines In a a. trolley car Soldiering Soldiering for me was out of ot the question ques ques- tion tion Uncle Sam does not approve of or orth th for tor his women The Tho next best thing I could do was to don the khaki Join the land army and do my at at home P Et be It known was my broth- broth er erSs Glory me he is still my brother he wears two wound stripes on his arm the did not finish tb thedr r fiendish work Patrick was fair handy with the gas mask As for tor the thebaud hat baud hafid d brother o 0 mine learned to play lay ball near the gas house The boys bos who watched him over there said he sure the champion hurler of ot otan an anyS trench he hit When Patrick went to war it was wal up to sis to see the old folks got the theIr r corned beef and cabbage at least leaston on onge p a week The army dont don't pay its men as much as the streetcar companies companies companies com com- and besides Patrick didn't know how regularly the paymaster was to pass him the sad news HER FIRST CAR TRIP The he ocean is fair wide he told me ne and from what Ive I've seen of it goin down to Coney on an Iron steamboat It ij 61 doggone wet I wont won't have much chance to slip back between battles to tohaid hand haid hand you any spare change Ill I'll be savIn savin sav sav- in r om the chocolate an the cigarettes cigar cigar- ettes so I guess its it's up to you sis sis to l hop op into the old overalls and do your b bl or the good of the country an the theAll All oro Rapid Transit company company I ut on knickerbockers and topcoat thay th day before Patrick went to camp I He e turned me round and round ana I laughed fit to kill You aou look a fiddle he saidI saidI said I know a lot o 0 be spend spendin in nickels riding in streetcars an leavin ther th lr automobiles checked in the garag garage gar- gar ag age If It you wasn't my sister Id I'd Quan- Quan t der a dime a block any day to ride in your bus I w went nt down to see Patrick off otto He w was s a as proud as a peacock of ot me in my khaki Never will I forget how foolish I felt the first day I crawled onto the back platform and gave the go ahead signa sig sig- na nal I was one of the first of ot the women conductors You ought to have seen peoples people's eyes pop out when they me They thought thou ht It was a big JOKe laughed and nudged each other and made funny remarks A few smart Alecks tried to get et fresh T j I IW ORDER ME r- r l AROUND I vo YOU OWN awe THE LINE MANY WOMEN J CARRY CHIPS OH THEIR SHOULDERS AM z PO I v SHE tIE tIEI n I PAID TOOK TOOH THE HE I MY FARE IRISH LAPS LADS JOB WHEN He Hc WENT SO SOME Ii W WITH OVER To I FURS ACID AUt FIGHT l DIAMONDS 1 FORGET fORGET I THEIR FANS fA bows A I IA y io EN I I od E. E THOUGHT OF CF 1 I WAS I COURSE ti S SOME ME KIND Kim 1 TH THERE TE OF A AFRESH I WAS THE rHE fR FRESH H r but I turned my ply shoulder should r and let on 1 I didn't hear them It didn't take very long for the i to get used to us The side snow part of our Jobs wore off In a hurry Aftel a few weeks we ve were ordinary conductors conductors conductors tors to be bawled out and heated cheated justas Just Justas as if it We we were men BOUNCING OF MR SOUSE SOUSE Ill I'll never forget the first drunk l I had to handle He lIe got aboard in a pretty tough part of ot the line He was one of those mean souses had been drinking fighting liquor and was itching for trouble He stumbled on the car and began weaving back and forth His breath would have wilted a It cactus plant Three whiffs of it equalled one lar large glass of bad whisky Fare please I said as he started for the inside of ot the carFare carFare car Fare nothing he mumbled Pay it yourself Drop a nickel in that box or getoff get getoff et off ott I ordered blocking his way with my arm The h h- h you ou say he came back bark I could tell the fighting stuff was as boiling boiling boil boil- ing up in his system getting ready to flow over Youre such a smart dame suppose you put me off Holding down downa a mans man's Job eh Well VeU then be a regular regular regu regu- regular lar guy g Let me see how strong you are I gave the stop signal The Irish Trish in me began to tingle to my finger tips Ups At times Umes like this a girl is mighty glad her grandparents were born near TIp- TIp I felt like I could sail into a I cageful of lions and make them lick my shoes before I half finished I Wasn't Mr Souse surprised when 1 I grabbed his arm and gave him a shove toward the door Even then he must have thought I was bluffing By the time he knew I was In earnest and was ready Teady to shove back or swing a burly young oung fellow near the door had Jumped out and lifted Mr 1 Souse on the toe ofa of ofa ofa a well wen planted shoe plumb into the middle of the street What do you suppose I did once it was all aU over and I was the winner byan by byan byan an Irish mile I began to cry Isn't that Just like a woman You see when f t agreed to take Pathrick's place pl-ce I never neter thought of ot the strong arm part of the Job You can bet your last penny Patrick didn't elthe The idea of men insulting women who were in uniform and doing their best to help out their country never hit a boy like Patrick TROUBLE WITH WOMEN TOO Since that first souse Ive I've had plenty of ot arguments with fresh and grouches and fare beats beata I haven't lost one yet jet because Ive I've found whenever it gets to the place where action is needed for me to win there is always three or four regular two-fisted two men for every welcher who tries to down a woman never believe it it but I have I more trouble with women than with men Glory but arent aren't they obstinate I And sassy Most of them carry a chip on each shoulder and It dont don't take the I bat of an eye to knock them off I Move up in the car please madam Ill I'll say to a fat woman blocking the aisle Not a budge I I Madam 1 will you please move up in inthe inthe I the aisle so the passengers can get in I plead Dont Don't you OU order me around Miss 1 puffs the fat one I want you to understand I paid my fare on this car carand carand 81 and Ill I'll stand any place I like Do you own the line What's the use of reasoning with a woman like that It is her kind who I cause working girls to give up their I jobs and take to the easiest way I Heres Here's another fact The women who I wear the best clothes and look the wealthiest are the ones most liable to forget torget the fare box The They have a habit of walking by with their noses Up I P Pin in the air all acting as If they they had had forgotten forgot forgot- ten all about such a trifle as as' a nickel Now and then one of them will give you an argument gay day say she paid when 1 I she knows and you know she didn't A pretty ticklish situation this be because because because be- be cause being dolled up like a a million i dollars the rest of the passengers side with her and think you are trying t to doher do doher doher her out of ot an extra nickel They never believe a lady who wears diamonds and a hat that yells Fifth avenue Is mean enough to cheat on her carfare MEETING THE ONLY MANDates MANDates MAN Dates Dates Dates' Say if it I J made p date with every fellow fel fellow fellow fel- fel low who asked me since I began ringing ringing ringing ring ring- ing up nickels Id I'd have to give up work worl and take up a good time for a living Some men will never get over the fact that you are a girl They cant can't figure figure- you as as' as a wage earner They think you are standing on the back platform of a trolley car for fun when as a matter of fact you are there In order to be able to eat Only once have I agreed to meet a passenger outside of car hours lIe He is a sailor I liked him the minute minute min minute min min- ute he asked me to change a dime I guess he liked me too because he kept riding in my car until I went oft off duty I had seen enough men in my six months' months 1 tj to know one when I saw him My sailor was a man What am I going to do about giving up my Job to the men who come back I understand theres there's quite a lot of 01 talk about whether it Is a womans woman's duty to step back now the war Is ts over and make way for a soldier Maybe she should Im I'm in no position position II tion to judge because Patrick will be home now any day Im I'm only substituting s lo log ing for forr him Besides my sailor-passenger sailor will be beback beback beback back in port about the same time and I have signed maybe ma a little later his home homo up to to act as in for life Ufe Fare Faie please |