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Show TIPS ON "HOW TO GET SICK" GET RESULTS Try running for a train when you are below par physically. Then- listen to the beat of your heart; you may be able to hear the flapping of angel's wings. Pull hairs- out of your nose and you open one of the best avenues for infection and bacteria to enter. en-ter. It is really exciting. You may get an abscess, a boil, erysipelas, or, best of all, septic poisoning. Forget about your eyes. If you do not see well, go get a pair of cheap glasses. If they don't fit, get another pair. You may go blind but don't worry about that. If you get a foreign body in your eye, try to remove it with a match, toothpick, or soiled handkerchief hand-kerchief Are you putting on weight? You enjoy your food, don't you? That's right, you live only once. You may get high blood .pressure, apoplexy, and diabetes, but don't worry about that. Think what fun you are having. Do your ears hurt? Use hot oil, turpentines, just anything so it is hot. Of course, you may permanently perman-ently injure your hearing, but why worry about that? These suggestions on "How to Get Sick" should help you shorten your stay here. Your wife can collect col-lect your insurance and with it find a smart man. |