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Show A LEWIS was a soldier As brave as brave could be, e Else he would not have tackled The drug-store brand, of " 'skce." If Lv.is hadn't tackled Tho drug-store whisky, he Would not have been convicted And paid a fine of three. "You tell a lie!" shouted Alice Spriggs, bringing her clenched fist down on her palm with a resounding smack. "I never tieted any profane language In my life. I won't stand It tho way you people peo-ple punish me!" The statement that called forth Ihka outburst In the courtroom wan the testimony testi-mony of Officer Mllner tlfnt Alice, a notorious no-torious colored woman had uncri shockingly shock-ingly profane and abusive language when she was ai rested for drunkenness. Court and spectators looked with astonishment as-tonishment at the Infuriated colored woman. wom-an. She was dragged back Into her seat by nn officer and the case went on, MIhs Spriggs was asked If she desired to cross-examine. cross-examine. "Ye?, sir." she cried; "It's almost time for mo and you to settle this quarrel. quar-rel. You have arretted me enough:" Mr. Mllner was excused and the court gave Alice thirty days, telling her that she would be pardoned If she could get a ticket out of the city. "Thank you kindly, sir." she said. Tho woman, who is completely demented when drunk, had finished a ninety-day sentence Junt four and a halt days before be-fore her last arrest. "I want to be a soldier And with tho soldiers stand." George Wilson told his Honor With manner mild and bland. "Though now 1 am a agrnnt. As meek as uny lamb. If pardoned I am willing To fight for Uncle Sum." "This fellow," said the lawyer, ' Tho public to deceive. Was begging through the city And showed an empty sleeve." "That's why the soldier business For me has many charms. When t had been enlisted I'd learn to carry arms." In npltn of Wilson's offer To don the army blue. He went Into the cell-house With sixty days to do. , In spite of the fervent promise he made a few days ago to quit drinking and take caro of his dying wife. William Counsel was In court again charged with being drunk and disturbing tho peace of his family and neighbors. "Didn't you promise to do better?" asked tho court. "Ycvs." said Counsel; "I told you thai I would go to work the next morning, and I did. I worked a day and a half, and then the rain forced us to null." "Dul why did you go home and.abuso your family?" ,'.'I,do.n't know'. except that 1 got to drlnkln . Ho got fifteen days. ' John Barnes became full And swore at a "bull" As only hack-drivers can swear. "You may go." said tho court. When ho .heard tlio report, "But you'll pay us a ten for your fare." There was a man there namod McQuade Who took sticks in his lemonade. He needed about Five bucks to get out; He didn't have them, so ho stayed |