| Show IP i P r PRIVATE PURKEY ON TOMATO TO HARVESTING News Item Soldiers Item Soldiers in eastern training camps are assisting farm farm- farmers farmers ers with the tomato harvest Dear Harriet Harriet- Lest you get the wrong Idea about a new detail I Just got harvesting and canning tomatoes I am just writing this note I know how at first thought it seems funny to to think of a jeep who joined up for a global war being in hi the tomato business but it is Important work Harriet When I and a lot of others got orders to help pick tomatoes I did not like the Idea Ide of being a Tomato Zouave I told Sergeant Mooney there was nothing about tomatoes in my draft papers and that my number was drawn from a fishbowl not from no tomato can Sergeant Mooney says Shut up dogface and do what you is told You are lucky to get tomatoes It could be watermelons I 1 says to him LIssen sarge I joined up to tobe tobe tobe be a hero and I never seen no hero with tomato sauce on him He tells me You arc are going to see one now my boy Well I am very firm with him and andI a d dI I tells him I was drafted to do a alot alot alot lot of things but that none of them had anything to do with ketchup I tells him I took a oath to fight for Cor four freedoms none of or which has go goto got gotto gotto to be picked off ofT of or a vine or pressed into a tin can Also I explains to him that the Atlantic Charter was not drawn up In no tomato patch Even when I am arguing that tha thamy my contract makes no men shun of any work among vegetables outside of a clause where I am to get a couple of heads cabbage-heads named Hitler an Tojo he just slips sUps me mc a sunbonnet and a pair of over over- overalls overalls overalls alls and tells me that while it wood woo d dk be bad for a jeep to be too took k up on charges of mutiny in the face of the enemy it wood be worker to tobe tobe t o be charged with mutiny in the face of a tomato I am kind of proud on account of o oI f I am one of the fastest tomato pick pick- pickers pickers pickens ers ens in my outfit I get a average of or 97 which is very high All the thebo's th e boys bos say I must most of had experience experienc e ee eI and they dont don't believe me when I Isay Isay say I never picked one before in my life liCe an In an always ahva's had a idea they grew on trees The sarge has out a claim that I am a pro I r o Well anyhow in a war like this we should all do what we get told to todo todo do and wherever I can help is okay so long as the sarge dont don't put me meon meon m mon e on no detail to pick prickly pears I send you all my love my darlin darling g Harriet Oscar l ILER MAN OF CHARM Hitler assured the German peo pee people pie that Heinrich Himmler newly named for important duties at home is a kindly sympathetic man News item Do not worry fellow Germans Germans- Dont Don't feel frightened sad or blue As I name that gentle fellow Heinrich Himmler over you Do not credit silly rumors That he is a 1 man of hate Oh I really cant can't imagine How such tales originate Hes He's the kindliest of persons persons- Ah that gentle placid face facet Hes He's a tribute to the virtues Of the race Treat all talk of ruthless tactics As just simple liverwurst Himmler wouldn't harm a house housefly housefly- y- y If the housefly saw him first Just the chief of the Gestapo Gestapo- This he is and nothing more He Hc plays softly Hearts and flowers To drive out the trials of war Hes He's my Good Will Delegation- Delegation Hes He's my little Fairy Prince Prince- Hes He's Sir Galahad in German German- Hes He's my Chief of Gentle Hints Hes He's the Boy who's Kind to Birdies- Birdies He feeds pigeons in the parks Hes He's our own Big Brother Movement And writes verses on the larks He helps ladies over oYer crossings He gives kiddies kiddies' kid dies dies' heads a pat When he rides in elevators He will always lift his hat Heinrich Himmler How you'll love him himl himlIn In his presence each heart melts Bring your troubles to him freely And do what do-what what he says OR ELSE Rally round this knight so shining Never doubt his gentle touch And remember fellow Germans Himmler will not you hurt hurt yOU MUCH A Gallup poll shows that a ma- ma majority majority majority of women favor a draft of the theair fair air sex for noncombatant war work with men opposing the idea The opposition of the men Is easily un Wl- They dont don't want to listen to all alJ those arguments over why the draft board chairman accepted that homely Smith woman and deferred deterred the eyeful known as Miss Jones One thing is certain if we wc have havea a draft of women the day when the tha draft boards have the last word will be lie over |
