OCR Text |
Show THE FREE LANCE. - ! Politics absorbed the interest of Salt Lake oity yesterday, and it was curious to nolo how people, having satisfied themselves as to the local result, inquired in-quired for the returns from their respective re-spective states. A careful census wouid have elicited the fact that the citizenship of Zion is composed of men from every portion of the union, from Maine to California. We believe if the Free Lance were police magistrate it would go hard with the majority of offenders that come before be-fore the court, comprising as they do the dregs and wrecks of humanity; but Judge Laney, an Ann Arbor boy by the way, has considerable of the milk of human kindness in him, and his bland smile boams gently upon tho vilest sin-nor. sin-nor. It speaks well for the manhood of a Judge who, though thrown into daily contact with tho outcasts of society, still maintains his sympathetic nature unimpaired, and administers the law with fairness yet without vindictivo-ness, vindictivo-ness, , - ; Who dost mankind below with pity see. A combination, of Dennis and Eich-nor Eich-nor is rather incongruous, but tho police po-lice court attorney bears it with charming charm-ing imperturbability. And it proves a very convenient combination, too. . He cau discourse at will in German and Gaelic, not to mention United Slates, and his linguistic accomplishments (it him signally for the satisfactory discharge dis-charge of his really arduous duties. Wo saw a bum onco tried in the police court who while drunk had resisted arrest ar-rest by an officer. Win. Condon, Esq., dofnndod him. There was not much of a defense to make as none of the witnesses wit-nesses materialized', but not in the least abashed Condon started in to make an argument iu which he quoted ancient and modern law, Roman and English customs, in proof that the officer had no right to arrest a free born American cltizeu simply because he chose to contract con-tract a jag and spread himself over an alley. Tho offence according to the attorney at-torney consisted in carrying the jag and its consequences out upon the highway. The oourt sustained the lawyer and the accused is careful hereafter, to recon-noitor recon-noitor his stamping ground before he starts on another jollilication. The city directory contains the names of several men bearing the patronymio Ellis aud the prefix Charles, but they are all honest workingmen; the Charles Ellis who toils with his tongue is not among thorn. Lecturer Ellis evideutly does not belong to Salt Lake City and that is the reason perhaps why he has so much to say here. Periodically he bobs up to defy God or some other moral cause for the admission fee that is in it. He borrows his ideas from Bob Ingersoll or Brother Carleton and decorates dec-orates them with his own platitudes He looks very sleek and well fed. doe Charles Ellis. The business must pay. A lady writes to the Free Lance asking, ask-ing, "Does flirting payr" That depends. de-pends. Once in the dim and distant past a girl flirted with us and when at the end of the chapter we made an inventory in-ventory we were out in ice cream, oyster oys-ter lunches, theater tickets and sundry other tokens of affection, just $125. Flirting did not pay us. |