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Show the painted red devils from Nebraska rush forth from their hostile camps with naked scalping knives and sausage saus-age indigestion to meet the picturesque cow punchers from Kansas with their trusty Winchesters and Pumpernickel dyspepsia in deadly battta array. Ugh! It is too bad Col. Ellis' mouth did not impart to the panting world the information infor-mation a little sooner, for we should then have found the key to tho bearish movement in American securities on the London exchange. We fear there is just one thing that can avert the sanguinary san-guinary meeting of tho American hosts on German soil. The remedy is drastic, but in an emergency so dire as that described de-scribed by Col. Ellis' mouth, and involving in-volving an international upheaval, it should be applied regardless of the tender feelings of the two combative principals. They should be restricted in their consumption of whisky to reasonable allowance. I GUI The awful news comes from Hamburg, Ham-burg, Germany, by way of Wichita, Kansas, and Col. Ellis' mouth, that a war between Buffalo Bill and Dr. Carver Car-ver is imminent. Dr. Carver is camping camp-ing on Buffalo Bill's trail, and In the ethics of the wild and wooly west, that means gore. Col. Ellis, considerate fellow that he is, notified the German police of the danger, and as soon as the conflict between the Indians and cowboys begins, the Teuton sleuths propose to take a hand in it. We shudder shud-der to think of the -consequences when |