Show FUN IN A NEW HEW YORK FLAT bab tells of ila dir search for ono one to live in ill THE JOY OF ENGAGING SERVANTS A woman must mo he be a genius who decides decide to live lire in a riot Type of help aich uhlon many ahny housewives will iza W here blind was vaa stronger than matter WS by the hie doll ste pre arr nett nt york I 1 NEW YORK sept 6 1892 there are re times in life when all that can bo be talked about Is 13 absolutely personal consequently IL a lonn long suffering public hii has got to bear my experience with a flat bat getting gelling ilia hie flat u as a 0 varied and somewhat tiresome time A would announce madly exactly what rent I 1 viah hilling to lo pay then I 1 would bo be taken to see a flit flat gor geons in mirrors mirror bors rich in cabinets tor for bric a brac living having bathtubs big enough tor for iollah Goll iol lih iii filch I 1 announced my approval I 1 found would cost coal me exactly double the price I 1 could pay visions ot of irato landlords rose ros before mo me and I 1 would tako take the elevator and go away a wiser it if a sadder women woman flUeS I 1 would think I 1 had just jim what suited TOO me thou kindly friends would inform me THE PLACE WAST but bat a at t Is lait the r flat a I 1 was gotten it Is tru truo a thil that the baah bathtub tub needed to be enameled and that the spare room was perfectly dark but as my ginesta never do stay slay in their rooms except when hen they sleep and dress that made no dil forence fe ronce alo landlord to enamel the baLla tub however I 1 know knew a man a mara man who has had pictures in tile iho paris salon and whose work everywhere commands an onor enormous price so I 1 suggested to him that instead of petal ing me a picture as ho he had bad prom hand ho be would enamel the lie ile d did ld andal and it isso Is so beautiful thai I 1 am a abrald to turn the hot hoi water on it end and having baying heard dreadful stories of the effect white while load has on ilia I 1 a am a afraid to lo sol got lu in it so perhaps I 1 hall bad bettor better have taken the iho picture and haild somebody fomo boily for palming ting the iho bathtub Ho conover nover ll it has bas his bis autograph on and 1 li I 1 iret got very hard up I 1 can call have it so loail tub and all as A study in blell life llo ile Is laa A realistic palo ler abid it strikes WO mo that this Is very close to realism PRESENTS FOR FOB TUB THE FLAT the next contribution to the iho nat flat ap feared bearrd in the iho shape of a picture also aljo it Is largo large ll it Is 15 in olli ills it has a liuo hugo gold frame mins and although altho uRh not a study to in still life fire because it shows running m star hater ll it took look up tip one ona entire side of aho lh parlor arid and made the chairs scoto so small that people were afraid to sit in them and when alley come in siy BAY they bad rather stand up and look at the picture A third present Is much more maLorIa I it came from an n old housekeeper and Is a chopping block it Is the size of a an ordinary round table able and nearly early ill fills a the 5 aho kitchen As our moat metal Is chopped tor us by the butcher 0 o cannot use it ir II 11 Js Is too hard to cut up for kindling w wood 00 d and another thing I 1 dont want to hurt the givers feelings tile the best u use e I 1 ha havo eon it put to yet was when t tha h a baby sat on it and baid h hammered a at as it with a potato masher tami this was not a study in still life rN GAGINO A SERVANT apropos of scrubwomen scrub women I 1 saw quite number of 0 kitchen ladles before I 1 ena ella engaged the ilia ono who bo eventually became my very onn on tile the first applicant tor for I 1 tile position of mistress in my any flat flak was tall lall slender willowy and coffee colored ues aes guell was a polo pale blue with larzo largo figures on oil it ft and her beat was adorned with a leghorn bighorn lint hat that had bad arbors that were she ab took a seat without an invitation I 1 then asked her if obo mo could cook she said yes with a III that was meant to show how little I 1 knew I 1 said tao ran you yon try fry oy oysters no the women I 1 have lived with always sent to the iho when they wanted thorn them then I 1 politely inquired con can you make waffles or hot tolls rolls no ko I 1 cant do no fancy cooking after abas this I 1 said how about t the he w washing ash in g bald sho h 1 I dont do no washing talked on lor for a bit and I 1 said by tho choby by what afternoons would 1 I have out WILU will solemnity she ib answered well I 1 dunno whenever you told me you anted to go id stay in and it if you wanted to go to tho the th ealter once in a while I 1 could arrango to be in this was kind of her but I 1 found that she was hardly the person I 1 cared to servo on under der AS AN ODOR or OF AND WHISKY the boxt applicant for tho the position we wat gushing bho bhe announced at the first eight of me that she bo felt the she could live with me forever but it at the first af her a ono one of patchouli ull and whisky I 1 decided shed never hao the pleasure of beginning but go she would not she gave me a full history of her bar family told me of the position they would occupy la lu ireland it they had bad their rights asked me what I 1 thought of gladstone indeed paid mo me quite a visit that was only interrupt by tile arrival of a gorman girl T this his incensed hor her that ike the lovely ni maiden aldon she aha turned and null fled and id seemed al to have lost loll all 11 desire to I 1 alvo y w walh ith mo me forever DER TWO tho the german was wholesome wh olom to look at jai in hor her manner but AS my know knowledge lodge or of gorman german to Is limited to three words and hor her of english as a limited to smile our discussion was short and monotonous we smiled at each other mid and then I 1 rubbed tny my lands hand together to Imi imitate Latis washing and she smiled again and nodded yos after that I 1 did a act that meant broiling a steak making roeln rok ln broad and dusting a room she gave a deep sigh IKU smiled sailly sadly and shook her bar head in 10 a way that meant no As I 1 do toot oot possess a sufficient number of clothes to keep a woman all the week I 1 waved my hand in farewell she back and aro 0 o separ separated atod we may bay never meet again but bita if my young gorman german friend concludes to marry it will bo be well tor for her to learn the arts of which I 1 well yon cant say I 1 spoke but which I 1 acted for or hor ever since tul that performance I 1 havo have felt feit that I 1 ought to go on the ibo stis but my maternal parent hiring having some discretion dH crellon disagrees with an 0 aimino A LADY amar I 1 thought I 1 would like to also a lady help she ibo camo came bho was severely ovo roly dressed in black cashmere caalim oro anti nd berman ners wore very good much botter better than an mine inc she had bad been to a school she ha know the th theory of 0 hut but she did not consider hot bread healthy she supposal al I 1 object to her having baying her french botcher lez che ono one even ing and her bor gorman professor tho the cical buo had bid nearly hired me I 1 wai wa so frightened but what a mothers are ny my maternal ma tornal camo til in put pub ilia oft in tho the coraor nod and without any regard of tho the young knowledge of tho the theory of broad asked her it if the she was going to try on me it that was raa hor her intention but shi she was collad my bly parent do hoostal regard me in the light ot of a ado doz to 0 o use a little theatrical and stia site proposed that no lady help work a theory with me the victim the tha lady jady hoid help however wont away very politely and although she say it I 1 know knoor that she trusted v ve 0 would see the ilia error of our ways moile THAN anas MATT LATTER Til the last lady n ho appeared masslon was slender had bad s a sharp noo and an inclination to down everybody id back her to cajohn L 1 sullivan and win every day I 1 simply agui ply asked hor her one question can you cook s boiled dinner la Is it a boiled dinner you want a ilir work ingmans dinner and what sort oralada of a lady aro are aou ou that has that it strikes me that its mighty poor outings you re going to give me that I 1 can rat got at ai mo me brothers house any time then she went ou on in a straight string A woman I 1 know who had come coma to la to help boll me III hit tho the books boia to cry tile the little dog ba ked the birds sang in the top lop or of their voices and for once ray my maternal parent was frightened but I 1 rose to tho the oc camon sion I 1 lid nt been lanzet taul arlit to la play poker for nothing so 80 after disappearing from the room for a mon nt I 1 camo came back and announced the call for u m policeman he will to hero here in loss less than livo five minutes nod and if youre not out by that lint tito ilmo I 1 ill have him take you to tho station house bouso she departed but lor for enily five minutes afterwards wo we could hoar boar hor her cursing as she went down tho the street and expressing her opinion of anito anotoly ly who had boiled dinners tho the woman I 1 know said to mo me illow how bravo you yon arol are and my parent knitted her bar brows and asked aben when thoro there Is no call how conail you ring lor for a policeman and I 1 said that thal comes from going t til u the theater I 1 havo have soon seen it dons done there and I 1 bluick like the stage here bore TILE THE jastrob JANITOR AND AD TUB THE SCRUB WOMAN now wo we are ara in I 1 a the hands of 0 the scrub w woman oman she Is ana amiable lable placid land and has baj a largo large and interesting finally family hillka we take in and do for I 1 think though that the scrubwoman scrub woman has missed missad her vocation sho she would have been it prize in a dime museum for although all she 0 looks look LILby I 1 am sure she eats eat soap sh iho will start out to mako make puro pure arid and sweet a small closet and bafaro it la 13 one third done she wants her bar second bar of soap blell this is il a small falling failing so far sho she and tho the janitor have got along amiably and that means a great deal in a fl flat a t he Is a rather dign ined gentleman and when wheat my any things were coming lo in ho be sug that a abai bo be put around a anali statue of venus for fear it might some of the children in tho the neighborhood since thou ven venus has ua worn my norm cost coal and a sailor hat and looks exactly as it if she worn were starting out to paint the town red llo ile has crit my any fur alturo and I 1 heard beard him say aay in a senti mannor you might know sho she cania camu from the south people from down there always expect to havo have plenty ol of roomy bids and roomy gr graves avoli thin was true but not altogether cheerful lie ie has dined with us once or twice and when I 1 say us I 1 near moan the scrubwoman scrub woman arid and hor her progeny and has bas oaten a salad dressed by in ratio mo saying that it wain t as zid bd as it II might be though for his part ho he liked more seasoning lie iio approve of my size and although I 1 am willing to oblige him in ill many things I 1 dont think I 1 can c an possibly grow lie he says the wy lady who lived thoro there before was a ono looking woman that impress od and ho he has made mo me quite conscious that thai I 1 would not imparl 0 even tho the cot cat still I 1 think wo we will bo be lendry fr that Is my intentions are good what his bis are ro will probably depeal Us his approbation of our oar cooking IT ALL an 80 fusan rassy to mo me I 1 hear percale grieving over trouble rf of getting places of their tin the but bul there Is certain to bo be a funny own old W and if one will only look as tho the I 1 fount qa h side the iho rest real dont miller matter you kno kne my friend I 1 am a believer la in be homes mes of ef courso course they their bo be gan cai mide made la fit r tat ny place e bill bat one that 1 li your very own whore wh wheat eather her you are big or little nl whether you impress or dont you art in your own way mistress of elf all you yon aurl vey Is most delightful doli gih tul anti and it li loright 8 right so r do YOU yon know why I 1 asked that woolen oui about the iho boiled dinner its be bacalla calla I 1 know some wrol wrote had bachelors ba be bills to live at their clubs and a at smart restaurants rottau who hyo have asked me m it II they the como come and dine with us UL aad an when villen I 1 hive sald said yes s and you bavo just wit alil s t you want wan bate have invert can ably asked for a boiled dinner year youri ago a nian dart taught too MO watt bat i a boiled all dig nor was into the big pot must mull go run in or two plenty of good potato poti toai a load of the thai arly bourly cabbage some cir cal rots rois groon corn corb indeed try every beget life blo that can bo be boiled and to flavor fattor it 11 all must bo be 0 a floco of bacon wheat everything Is taken out and each pal pel into lis its own dlly the chicken will be as white as milk and m lender leader as possible the will bo be sweet tail nod fairly molt melt to lu your mouth arid and the piece ot of bacon may bo be presented to the scrub woman then than lor for dessert with this dinner you have boiled applet dalip lings it that Is a work ingmans dinner it is a very good ono but I 1 can tell you thero there are very lew few cooks ha arh know how to lu cook it and are very fow few men who dont like it it taste a heap better when it Is 1 as it should be than the hie various fancy dillies of which they tiro tire st SG no cook reigns in the dab bab who cannot compels compau a boiled dinner As wang nays mays she shell not reign hell ahall not even sprit sprinkle ikle TIIE THE FUNNY SIDE BIDE or 1171 As A I 1 said before orio Is helped abod 1 a good bit in most everything it if ono one 11 only look tor for the iho tunny funny side of it IL the tina tho the lauh laugh will knock out the tear or the fro frown W n and you are a deal better woman for the laugh that thai Is a wise woman who can sall imalle at a compliment be pleased and lorfel forge it that Is a wise woman who call caa at an insult and never see it IL that thai Is a wise woman who can smile when the little worries are coming abbat and make of them little blaset too fun that la Is a wise woman who call ca smile wheat she up and who can call go to sleep with a smile for I 1 in n this way ahe he greets the coming day and at the said eod ot of it she abo has bas blotted blot teil out all chadha the alt agre agree eables tables that ti Is a wise women woman who has a smile for her friends and hr her oo ralo it will keep the first and it Is the best against the last that Is a wise woman who ein can smile no matter how lie ho feels she Is 13 abe ib woman who has learned to rule rate not only odly herself barsel f but will kilo gain dominion over the he cook and that moans moan that she governs comfort you misconstrue filmy it friend whether you aro are man or woman hot but I 1 do you an invitation lacoar and have bavo a smile salla with EAL BAB I 1 |