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Show FOR TJ IK KADir.S. I ; AVhcn women come to sit in the jury box, poibly infants may sret to Lie criorii in court. An Iowa woman ai Ivertics i'ur a husband, "Ionoy no object, must be healtby and willing to work." The man who is very urbane to his wile before strangers, is generally Iter haiie behind their backs. ' ' An exchange says : "Philailelnhiu has female undertakers." What do they undertake '.' To fret married ? " A you.ij; mau named Turn married a cousin of the same name, on t lie plea that "One good turn rlesprrrs another." an-other." The euiiMis-tiiker in this city asked a woman the aire of her oldest child, and the reply was: '-'Xou have come round a month too sonn."-"-.V. ' A Michigan census-taker came across an intelligent man who had been married Jive years, bat had never in- I iiuired his wile's Christian name. ; Four youne ladies of Indiana horsewhipped horse-whipped an impertinent youth who had added their names to an auction list of their father's property. A' thirty-two months girl thus accosted ac-costed her paternal relative the other day : "Papa, will you buy me some hole in put in my ears, so I can hare some rar-rings : A rather careless cook in Memphis, recently steeped a choice selection of lucil'er matches in the tea, and now a whole family of seTen slumber in the yalley. That old lady, lUU years old, who knits all the stockings for the neighborhood, neigh-borhood, and brings in all the family wood, is just now in Xevr Hampshire. She is an orphan ! "There is a new song called "Father will settle the bill." Miss Jones considers con-siders it a fine composition, but her papa can't see it, and she says it is because he is so dreadful deaf." "I ain't ' a going lo lire long, mother," said a wo-begone looking youngster, one day, to his maternal parent. "Why not, pray?" "Beoau.-e my pantaloons is all tored out behind," was the conclusive answer. Lady "Four of those chairv which I so lately purchased of you arc broken." " Upholsterer " Indeed, madam ! The- only way in which 1 can account for that is, that some one must have been sitting on them." A rictim of unrequited affection, concludes as follows : "I sat uic downaud thought profound: This maxim wise I drew; Its easier far to like a girl Than make a girl like you. ' A Detroit lady complains that her husband has fancy to "gaze lovingly upon her while holding her out at arm's length by the hair, caressing her checks in a way that lilts her clear across the parlnr witho tt a come djwu until she stopped for good. |