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Show Forum Editorials . April 1,1994 Dear Editor: Dear Editor. i Being an avid follower of Rush tiresome Limbaugh, it becomes a little n , Being an avid follower ofthe Peanuts comic strip, it becomes a little tiresbme when the only time my personal favorite. Peppermint Patty, merits any ink in the pages of the Forum is in the way of some columnists childish carping about headlights on vacuums and shopping for toothbrushes. Saying that she did poorly in school is the last straw. Im reasonably sure that Mr. Pilling intended to elicit a few chuckles with his column of twp weeks ago. However, after a morning spent watching poor Charlie Brown miss the football again (that Lucy is such a bitch), I was not in a humorous mood upon encountering his witticisms at lunch break. I do not think I am being in taking serious umbrage at d such smugness and puerile whining, even in jest I love Peppermint Patty and often enjoy reading the Peanuts comic strip by the light of my vacuum cleaner or glow in the dark toothbrush. And I own all of Kathie Lees compact disks. So there!! Welcome to the real world. when the only time he merits any ink in Wit da' deep the pages of the Forum is in the wayof childish carping about thoughts is jes laak me. Ah have some columnists oh vacuums and shopping for ma own deep throughts. Here is headlights toothbrushes. Saying that he was a pig on one a dem. Old MacDonalds farm is the last straw. . so life on back far, eatin when Ahm Sometimes my Looking Im reasonably sure that Mr. Pilling 1 realize that I have spent too much fried Spam n eggs, Ah wish it intended to elicit a few chuckles with his after time extolling the virtues of corwas chicken insted. Then when Ah column of two weeks ago. However, and ' sexist rect grammar, punctuation and git me some chicken, it don taste a morning spent unsated by Rush was degrading remarks (because strong verbs." I think there comes a too good fer breakfast. preempted because Tonya Harding time for every 20th century woman Ahd like ta be one a her coJohn Bobbit while Geraldo and when she must no longer extol the lectin a small, incompatible Sally Jessie slugged it out for production virtues of those hypothetical, in- aminals. She culd keep me in a rights), I was not in a humorous mood his witticisms at lunch tangible rules, but the virtues of cage n takemeoutondemspeshal upon encountering break. I do not think I am being thin-- , , that icon of womanhood: Barbie. acasions when she wants ta see skinned in taking serious umbrage at such Granted, Barbie has not always terror an suspicion. She kin show d smugness and puerile whinbeen the role model she is now. me he othe ferry creatures n watch ing, even in jest I love Rush, and I often watch him There was a time when Barbies ma eyes git big n roun. while eating Mentos and Stork Chocolate image was little more than a buxom so dont Resin. And I own a flo-b- e June Cleaver. Now, however, with Sincerely, knock it So there!! Welcome to the real Sincerely, such marketing strategies as Barbie Derrell Felts world. Charles Schultz Mom and Barbie Y uppie, I feel she Rush!! . ,, Long Live freshman, art is a role model all girls in the world Reagan Rightwing MBA student Lord should strive to emulate. Martha Vasqucz Guest Editor Dear Editor, That there girl 5 1 : ed thin-skinn- ed short-sighte- short-sighte- 4 knows Ive tried to fashion my life after the upstanding guidelines that were established for Barbie by the Mattel Corporation in the 1950s. For example, I know that physical appearance is really how a woman gains respect in the world. There should be no exception to waistline. I have made the circumference my No. 1 a one-fogoal for 1994. Also, even though there are some proven side effects to breast implants, I know that at any risk, large perky breasts are vital to a womans self esteem. I have my hair lightened every other week (with a pollutant peroxide, mind you), then Finish it off at home with Final Net and a blow dryer. My look is polished by the most flattering of face colors for women of any nationality: frosted robin egg blue. Dont forget to curl those lashes! When I give myselif the final once over in the mirror from the points of my stiletto heels to the tips of my freshly feathered hair I know that by following in Barbies footsteps I am giving the world my all. Lets go get em, girls! 12-in- ch ot non-environme- What Are Sonny's And Cher's Top Rules To Live By? I dont know. Ive never experienced it.. I sit in a pumpkin patch and wait for the Great Pumpkin to arrive. 55 Warm beer, greasy food and loose women. top-to-bot-t- . The pill. The day to celebrate St. Patrick religious saint. The Forum is published every Tuesday. The ' editorial staff encourages letters from students (include major), faculty and all other readers. Address all publications to Forum, Converse Hall Room 205, 1840 South 1300 East, Salt Lake Gty, UT 84105. Submissions must be received ore week before publication. Due to limited space, the Forum editors reserve the right to edit all submissions. Opinions expressed on the editorial or commentary pages are' those of the writers and are not to be construed as those of the Forum, Associated Students of Westminster College, the College administration, faculty or staff. Mail subscriptions arc $20 per year. the |