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Show when Larry Downing heard that I was going to reveal his missing classes to the public he came to me on his knees: Please dont print what I said. Itll ruin me. I really N By Dean Petrulas havent been to classes for a week. The trouble with the world now. . (I dont know for sure whether So many people in college or comso is is that Ken are Fred and everything adays going to Alaska, university condemn the athlete beplicated. Even Readers Digest jokes but Im quite sure Larry is. I heard cause he receives financial aid for are getting that way. You think Im that Dean Ballenger signed up . . . athletics. Yet the majority of these kidding? Well, Im not! Nonsiree . . . A one-wa- y individuals dont realize the headtrip at that . . . I remember a short time ago when CAMPUS BITS . . . According to a aches and trouble involved for the I was reading a few. Things got so recent report, the girls in Ferry athlete. involved that I had to pick up a Hall arent really that way . . . To defend an athlete because he . . . Whos needs defending I can start on the physics book in order to relax. been fooling around with my notes) aspect of his Grant-in-AiThe STUDIOUS STUDENTS . . . Over. . One typical hard - studying, thing is, if a person would stop to heard at their daily bull session in slave-driviWestminster .student figure out the hours the athlete the student lounge recently, were understand couldnt why he had practices, the time hes away from Ken Ruecket, Fred Perry, and Larry ben rejected by the blood donation school, plus the classes he misses, Downing. These boys are gripers committee. The reason why he he is involved with financial em. . . You name it, theyll gripe found he out later too had little barrassments and behind in his about it This time it happened to blood in his alcohol stream . . . class work. be popular songs. But this time Did you know that the WestminAt the rate of $250 a semester, they had a reason to gripe. For ster Commuan of athlete makes approximately, for College equivalent the arrangement nist example, take is . . . the hours he practices and the Brainwashing Chapel Hit Parade has of Tom Dooley . (Hold it Larry, Im hours hes away, 32 cents per hour. . . . Why, Tom boy doesnt hang too ) shows This that if a person involvany more, Hit Parade just tears Bob Seri seen was at the in ed Junior sports would get a part-tim- e him limb from limb. Oh well, one Prom smeer-prothree hours a day, he lipwearing working anjob way is just about as bad as stick. He it was off than if he parbe would better says strawberry other flavor . . . (Who do I know that ticipated in sports. As the session progressed, one has strawbery lipstick) . . . Before you, as an individual, . these guys from Wyoming -- . . of the new students came in and to criticize the athlete, restart . . . And speaking of worth. He was added his Wyoming, is playing for the school member full of gripes, too (thats the lets not forget Wayne Mac Mc- and his hereward is an education. thing I like about Westminster . . . Laughlin. Weve got some awful is tedious, and The involved time He men- nice fellas on campus, and Mac everyone sees I am the not athlete does is on the top of the list. If you saying tioned something about his English I am simply not but it, appreciate need to him teacher actually expecting something done and want not the for students, you, saying can you imagine someone dependable, learn English Mac (or that I always thought there was Wayne) is your boy . . . But dont to criticize it. The athlete is doing edsomething different about English let this guys outward appearance his best for the school both in athletics. and ucation fool you too much, hes full of the tPirfiprc JUST TALK . . . Ken, Fred, and devil . . . and I use the word with A strong bench strength for Larry are planning a trip to Al- full meaning. When he and his Nethe Westminster basketball team aska. Last year they planned one vada friend get going, just watch to Panama but it never panned out . . . Theyre a couple of walk-an- g is beginning to take shape .' and out (Ken was afraid of the HeadAtomic Reactors . . . And if show up in Parson games. Men hunters. He doesnt have to worry you think Im kidding you, just ask like Dave Petersen, Eric Joffs, Duthough. Panama headhunters are anyone on the third floor of Foster ane Greene, Tom Grondel, and smart. They wont take just any Hall. Why, Ive seen nights when Dean Petrulas team together to make a strong second team for I couldnt even get to my room beol head its got to have somecause of flying chairs . . . And, of the Parsops. thing in it worth taking) if some course, leave us not forget the Freds got the idea that In past years this is what Coach guys can sell sunlamps to the na- shaving cream fights Oh boy, Richardson has been lacking. tives, he should be able to sell those were dillers . . . Once I even to the Eskimos. Hes thought the plaster on the ceiling It was bench srength that nearly even got a song written for the was going to break loose And beat a strong Weber College crew. cold nights up there Squaws then I remembered they took care Two foul shots by Dave Petersen Along the Yukon. (Im wondering of that last year (someone once and a long shot by Duane Green if his girl is going to let him get told me that Wayne and Bobs sparked the Parson drive that tied outta her sights) . . . But then theme-son- g was Dont fence me the game, only Weber dumped in again, Im wondering if he would in . . . and it fits em to a T) . . . two points in the last 20 seconds. have much of a .chance with the THE MOSLEM RELIGION HAS women anyway. The way WanderNINETY - NINE NAMES FOR ing Romeo Dan Valentine talked GOD? BUT OF ALL OF THEM in his column a few weeks back, THERE IS NOT OUR FATHER. SCHOOL SUPPLIES he had quite a spree in his younger Im also beginning to wonder if . . . days were not in for another industrial - and And SPEAKING OF revolution. General Electric is putPLACES?. BYU HAS AN EXTRAting out a new Electric Car . . . GROCERIES CURRICULAR NAME . . . Purity It sells for $5,000 Five hundred Playhouse. for the car, and $4500 for the cord. IN TACOMA, Wash., a newspa- Whats this world coming to . . . per monthly report compares the Farewell . . . number of baby boys bom in their A TIP O THE HAT: To the Open to 11 p.m. many fair city during the month with the enthusiastic Juniors and all others number of girls. One month the pa- who in making last Decemhelped 2053 So. 13th East per came out with this headline bers Junior Prom an evening . over the usual story: BOYS AND GIRLS NECK AND NECK. (Our Not too many people, except learning system is sure progressing those who have done it before, rapidly) . . . A COLD, CRUEL WORLD: Larry know what goes on Behind the Visit Downing isnt flunking any more Scenes when it comes to making classes He just isnt going any- a successful dance. Theres obtain more. Another ambitious fella, ing an orchestra (and that doesn Laurie Winterer, had a fever and mean just any orchestra), buying missed classes for a whole week and fixing decorations, selling tick . . . Could it be rabbit fever? Then ets to reluctant students, securing theres poor Ken Ruecket again. entertainment, and a million anc Heres a guy that the world owes a one other things that the average living to. Kens really got life person never dreams about. It was OPEN AT NIGHT rough . . . Why, hes been studying a lot of hard work, but Im sure al FOR COFFEE so hard he says hes getting cal- those who participated will surely 8:00 to 10:00 luses on the brain. (There he goes agree that it was h the flattering himself again). , And time and energy involved. Zee pehMoue,6 THERE HERE Monday, February PARSON THE Page 4 f2Ctt Cherts hu-m-- d. n, Burgess Evans Eligible Burges Evans, 65 sophomore center, became eligible January 29 and played the three home game stand the following Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Evans was declared eligible after being absent from the hardwoods because of scholastic difficulties. In the three games played last week, Evans was a factor in helping big Al Barnett control the backboards. Although only a sophomore, Evans is 25 years old and has many years of basketball to his credit Burgs biggest attribute is his unbelievable reach, an arm span of 87 inches, biggest known for any man his size. Coach Richardson is very happy, for the addition of Evans which will make the Parsons a strong contender for the NAIA basketball tournament held in Kansas City every year. ... of ... hu-m-- m two-cen- ts eye-to-eye- ). Barnett of Parsons Ranking Rebounder Al Barnett 66 sophomore pivot man, is leading the Parson rebounding attack with 156 rebounds for 10 games. Barnetts rebounds, plus the combination of Max Waddoups and Eric Goffs, have pulled down 608 rebounds for a team effort. 16, 1959 The Parsons as a team are ranked 29th in the nation in total team defense allowing only 60.8 points per game to be scored against them. This strong rebounding and defensive surge by the Parsons has come through the talented defensive work of Reid, Healy and Waddoups Waddoups leading the two because of being assigned to tougher opponents and doing a good job. Parson Footballers Beat Girls in Exhibition On Friday, February 6 the Westminster girls basketball, team took on a rough and tough gang of Lasses from the Parson football team. The game was played under girls rules, which are a bit different from the boys. Actually, this game starts a fund raising campaign to send the girls team on a basketball trip to Laramie, Wyo. The girls from the football team were led by Smooth Legs Rooks, Bustie Thomas, Hippy Kirkes, Bustless Murray, Skinny Cheim and What a Body Anderson. The price for this evening of fun was only 25 cents and was worth it By the way, the boys were lucky and won by the tune of 37-34. ... ... deep-freeze- rs FAR-AWA- INVITES YOU To enjoy the finest in ITALIAN FOODS PLUS A VARIETY OF 20 Y KINDS OF PIZZA HARWOOD'S well-spent- ... THE STUDENT LOUNGE (Do-Flo- 1320 East 2nd South p) Open til 1 a.m. Weekdays Open til 3 a.m. Saturdays well-wort- STUDENTS.... .V? , V- - ..'it'-;,.- . v:T V For Quick And Comer 21st South and 13th East Courteous Service Bring Your Car To WESTMINSTER SJUTOCO |