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Show 2 THE SIGNPOST THURSDAY, OCTOBER 23, TW1 Published Seml-Monthly During The College Year Official Student Paper of WEBER JUNIOR COLLEGE Ogden, Utah Editorial Offices 02, 403 Moench Building Editor: Edward Anderson -:- Business Mgr.: Marjorie Vowles Editorial Assistant Dewey Hudson Associate Editor Keith Jaques News Editor Maurice Richards Society Editors Mildred Taggart, Sophie Reed Sports Editor Oren Jacobs Editorials Lesbeth Lucas Music Editor Emmett L. Wiggins Cartoonist Billy Johnson Photographer Jay Heslop Collector Joyce Lufz Staff Stenographers Doris Owens, Dorothy Cardon Circulation: Robert Blakeley -:- Faculty: C. M. Nilsson Reporters: Adrienne Russell, Beth Ellis, Charlotte Johnson, Wallace Pingree, Evelyn Stromberg, Margaret Olsen, Lois Rosenbaum, June Rose, Dorothy Cardon, Margaret Peterson, Wanda Snow, Chloe Yates, Robert Farris, Bert Strand, Jack Standing, Anna Prothero, Paul Blood, Jeanne Anne Waterstradt, Scott Cartwright. Member Rocky Mountain Intercollegiate Press Member Associated Collegiate Press Money, Money . . . Inflation and deflation, these are terms newly come into public consciousness. Anything that cuts purse strings and empties money bags in a hurry is sensational and even vital, especially when the purse strings are yours and yours. Inflation means that a student spending $100.00 a month last year in Ogden will spend something like $120.00 a month this year, or else pull in his belt considerably. Now don't worry because you have never spent even so much as $50.00 a month. The ratio still holds and the hundreds of little devils with sharp knives that make up inflation are still sawing away at your penny bank and making headway too. Inflation means profits to a far-sighted, moneyed business man; for knowing that price rises are pending, he will stock heavily in his commodity and otherwise hedge to make profits and reduce his cost of living. Similarly it is possible for any householder to stock up while prices are still low, provided he has the money. For students actual school costs are fixed. In that, students are fortunate, but of course they are subject to other price rises the same as any one else. Fortunately wages likewise rise as a part of inflation. In fact the too free spending that comes from an abundance of money is regarded as a chief cause of inflation. Therefore we now have experts advising us to curtail spending, and government regulations curbing time buying, and still other regulations being formulated to limit price rises as much as possible. So advice to students during an inflationary time such as this, when the temptation is to spend lavishly, is to practice every economy. There is a period coming when a little cash on hand will go even twice as far as a lot of cash goes now. And when that time comes, we shall have deflation. Then it will not be optional whether or not students and others pull in their belts. They will pull in their belts. Jobs will be scarce, wages low. Odd-Shaped Designs . . . Sitting passively in a rag of sunshine in that ever so cold storage room, the college library, we find our mind is not on study but wandering. Over near the window in the lefthand corner, is a freshman courageously conquering a mouthful of gum. His jaw action is superb. His rhythm perfect. Yet he has forgotten completely his purpose for being in the library. Our gaze shifts to a high and mighty mighty high sophomore. He too is staring blankly out of the window, but his gaze is not the same as that of the freshman. He seems to be attempting to ascertain what the dim future holds for him. She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me . . . Then there is unbraided from the silence a low groan. That extreme sound has escaped from the lips of a beautiful coed ordinarily possessed of a smile that is as easy as two plus two. Now what is this about? Three guesses, and two do not count. Yes . . . outside the dead leaves turn handsprings on the lawn, but inside there is peace and quiet. Hamburger . . . Even an editorial writer hesitates to call the assembly committee vandals. But yet a ruthlessly thumbtacked notice of theirs still defaces the bulletin panelling in the Moench building. Perhaps as good a point of difference as any between junior colleges and senior colleges is that in junior colleges you can still find the "writing on the wall." Pranksters . . . "We are beggars of the street, Give us something good to eat." Many a time recently you have answered the front door bell to hear just that. And you have found standing there a group of small boys and girls, faces masked, hands outstretched. And you have gone into the kitchen to return with a handful of some kind of candy or cookies. Halloween! That night of all in the year persons look upon with tolerance if not actual enjoyment upon doorbell ringing, yelling, and other forms of revelry. In our school the Frenisti club has turned prankster for the occasion, but the club comes with a gift instead of asking gifts. It is Frenisti's Mardi Gras. For details see the society page, but this costume dance is one of the things that make a school that school and not some other school. It fits an occasion. It is romantic. Too, it is a challenge to excellence, not only for Frenisti but also for other social clubs. And so on Halloween with Frenisti and other wizards and witches, skeletons and cadavers we will celebrate the Mardi Gras of 1941. On Other Campuses . . . University of New Mexico biology department announces its resignation from the position of state animal burial company. It seems that everything from a road hog to a petrified log has been presented to its laboratory for research purposes. SaMoJac, newspaper of Santa Monica junior college, is on the lookout for persons guilty of hiding talents. According to the Criterion of Mesa college, going around with girls keeps one young. It quotes: "I started running around with them when I was a freshman and I'm still a freshman." John Light, news analyst for the New Mexico Lobo, comments: "This school is very near to lacking the characteristic that distinguishes a university from a trade school and most other institutions ; namely, the emphasis on thinking. This absence of an intellectual attitude is noticeable in the various phases of campus activity, both curricular and extra-curricular." Pretty Ginny Simms took out a bachelor's degree in education, but like Ann Sheridan deserted pedagogy for entertainment. After singing with Kay Kyser's orchestra she now has her own program over CBS. Headlines used by the Snowdrift of Snow college, Ephraim, assure the reporter that at least the first line of his article will be read. The head is merely the first few words of the story set in larger type. The University Daily Kansan publishes an interview with an average man, meaning an average campus man, of course. His answers run like this. Q. How does it feel to be the average man? A. It just feels average. Q. How many hours a day do you spend at your daily labor . . . going to school? ' A. Let us merely say that in my day I have studied. Q. What do you plan to do after you are graduated from this university? A. Join the army and see Europe. Q. What is your favorite book? A. The Bible, because it's all new to me. Q. What is your favorite color? A. Red, because that is the color of a woman's lips. We are not offering any apologies for our ball team, yet. He Wore a Mask UNMASK SIR AND I'LL MAKE THE AWARD Football Problems Are Puzzle to Coed Fan Biographer Libels Lifelong Friend In Villainous Skit (Ed. Note: This commentary is the first in a series of articles between Dan Basil Ransid Bailey and Pete Quite Queer Petrie. The opinions are those of the writer and are sanctioned by the recipient. Signpost is not responsible we hope). By DAN BAILEY Peter Q. Petrie started life at a very young age as a small, male, boy. When Pete was born (of course there has always been some controversy as to whether Pete was born or was the result of an unsuccessful WPA project) anyhow, when he came to this earth the administering physician was very, very pessimistic about the entire thing. The doctor went out into the hall and spoke solemnly to Petrie's father, who paced anxiously there. "Mr. Petrie." "Oh, Doc, has it come? Is it here yet?" "Yes, it's here. It just came." Oh thank heaven. Tell me, Doc, Is it a boy or is it a girl?" "I don't know," said the doctor. "All I can say is that it's a good argument in favor of birth control." These were the strange words which ushered Pete Petrie onto our planet. (There are also rumors that when the stork was bringing Pete it circled around the zoo three times and Pete had to talk damn hard before the bird would deliver him at the hospital). Little Cherub The next time we see any important signs of our little cherub was at the tender age of three days when he looked coyly up into the face of his father and said, "Well, pop, what am I, a he or a she?" His father was delighted that the child could speak so young and to reward the child gave him a cloth ostrich to play with. (That mig"nt be taken as a premonition for that ostrich was not the last bird that Petrie was to get). The child was delighted with the cloth toy and spent his time playing with it in his own sweet, loving manner. (This consisted of kicking the stuffing out of it and wringing its neck trying to make it lay an egg. Of course Pete was too young then to know that in years to come he was going to lay eggs much more regularly than any poor ostrich). Proper Handle It was at the age of six weeks that the family decided upon Peter Q. Petrie as the proper handle for their little son. (What the "Q" stands for nobody quite knows. Some say "Queer," some "Quaint." His nephew said it means "greu-some" but his nephew is crazy and nobody pays any attention tojiim. The best bet is that it means "Quantity" because instead of being born with a silver spoon in his mouth, Pete was discovered to have three golf balls, a can of sliced ven ison, a six-volume encyclopedia and the pendulum from a grandfather's clock). When the child was named it was thought by all concerned that now there would be nothing to do but watch him grow. Little did his poor unsuspecting parents suspect (which is perfectly normal if they were unsuspecting parents). At the tender age of three years Pete was lying in his crib when he heard two boys outside his window discussing girls. One of the boys didn't have a date and he was saying, "The trouble with me is I don't know too many girls." Instantly Pete stood up and shouted "There is no such thing as too Of All Things-Radio Show Is To Be Book First the worst, second the same, last the best of all the game may not prove true tonight. The Radio Guild is presenting its first program at nine-thirty p. m. over KLO. The series will follow the pattern of a book. Each program is in the form of a chapter. Naturally the opener is to be the table of contents.Those in charge suggest that tuning in might turn out "not half bad." many girls." Such has been his policy up to date. Full Capacity At the age of six years (or in other words when Pete reached his full mental capacity) he was sent to school for the first time. This was a great moment in his young life. He had heard that the best way to attract girls was to whistle at them. When the first day of school let out Pete's lips were swollen to three times the normal size. The second day Pete's class was taken down into a room where they were each given a pint of milk to drink according to the school's health policy. Pete felt an inborn desire to spike his, but all he could find to put in it was his can of cigaret lighter fluid, so in it went. For the rest of the day every time he coughed the end of his nose lit up. (People who like Pete say that this mishap is the reason his nose is red every Saturday night; of course those to whom he owes money, all five thousand of them, say it is from the pink elephants that he sees stepping on his nose). Pete Learned More about his grade school would be useful repetition so let's take a quick gander at his junior high days. Most of his time at this age was spent playing harmless, childish pranks such as poisoning his fellow students and throwing bullets 'into the bonfires at pep rallies and betting on who they'd hit when they went off. There was also a new game Pete learned. It happened one day when he got down on one knee to tie his Shoe. At the same time some other boys got down on one knee to see what he was doing then Lady Ivory stepped in. On that occasion our hero lost his entire bankroll (17 cents and two telephone slugs) but he learned something. He learned that "snake eyes" and "box cars" come up more times than "seven or eleven" and also that lead, melted and poured into a hole at just the right spot on a pair of dice, will remedy that unfair situation. (The following day Pete's mother missed one pair of her best bone dice, the same day Pete's little brother missed one of his little lead toy trucks, and that same day Pete paid his candy bill at the local grocery store.) Bad Habits Now don't think Pete didn't get over these bad habits of his, because he didn't. Today he is still the same sweet, kind boy he was, and his mind is still the plague spot it was then. Today he still has the same respect for the feminine sex that he cultivated as a child. Why, when a girl goes down the street, does Pete whistle at her? Does he ever follow her and get acquainted? YES: inevitably. And so you have heard the story of the great Peter Q. Petrie. You have heard of his hardships, his passes completed or uncompleted and so in closing let me say that the truest thing ever to be said of Pete were his own words, quote: "I've never been arrested for going too fast in a car, but I've had my face slapped." FOR THE A. M. S. DANCE Let the LUV-LEE BEAUTY STUDIO 480 24th Street Add Loveliness to Your Coiffure Dial 6962 Dear Editor: The pep, which I'm sure Weber has, certainly wasn't shown at the last football game, I became aware that the grandstand was almost empty. Here and there were scattered a few freezing, but loyal Webe rites. Then I thought of how our boys would feel when the last gun went off and they were faced not with cheering boosters, but with instead, empty bleachers. Don't you think it is the duty of every Weberite to make our boys feel appreciated in the next game? Yours truly, Chloe Dear Chloe: Every loyal Weberite should make it his personal duty to see that the football team knows that it is appre ciated. We are sure that every student does feel loyal to our team, but at times that feel ing is likely to be carelessly overlooked. Perhaps warmer weather in the next few weeks will help bring out that hidden feeling. After all, a cold grandstand is a very un pleasant place to spend an evening. Yours truly, Ed. Dear Editor: At the Weber - Fullerton game I was getting very excited, when all of a sudden, the band started playing and the Whip girls started lead ing the crowd in a school song. I sang and I missed the play that the football boys did and I wondered what happened. Perhaps you could get the information on what hap pened, or better, tell the band to keep quiet until the excit ing part has passed on. I surely would appreciate it very much. Sincerely, Dot. Dear Dot: We missed the play too. We agre"e with you. Bands and songs should be used to build pep, but at the right time. What good does it do to yell for the boys when you can't even see what they are doing? Yours truly, Ed. Dear Editor: Did you notice the charming bootblacks who infested the campus the other day? Their shines were really tops, but their knees were red as beets and their hands were even worse. Do you think they will ever be able to get their hands white again? I'm so sorry for them that I feel it is my duty to find a way to get their hands and knees back to normal. I do wish you could help me. Yours for a cleaner, May. Dear May: I did notice the bootblacks the other day and I also saw that their equipment included black, brown, and white polish. Why don't they polish their hands with white polish to get that snowy effect? The knees problem could be solved by longer skirts until that condition passed away. If this is not the advice you desire, consult some of the bootblacks of last year. Yours, Ed. Dear Editor: I am a lonely freshman. For the last week I have been ignored by the sophomore girl. Could it be possible that I have B. O., or do I have pink toothbrush? My sophomore friends simply keep away from me ever since the W. A. A. outing. Could I have contracted a serious dis ease up in South Fork? I didn't meet a skunk, so that couldn't be it, or could it? I am so miserable that I think I shall commit suicide. What can I do? Yours truly, Pansy. Dear Pansy: Don't feel too bad. The sophomore girls are probably missing out on a lot of the gossip and feel sad too. Just remember that you will be a sophomore yourself some time. Wait until then and see the other side of the story. Yours truly, Ed. Dear Editor: Is there a phantom in our midst? Or am I dreaming? I personally don't think I am, for other people have noticed this thing too. I have reference to the little messages which are printed above the drink fountains. They all say the same thing and are signed the "Blue Beetle." I, as well as many other persons about the campus, would like to know who this "Blue Beetle" is. Can you give me any clues ? Lois. Dear Lois: Perhaps the "Blue Beetle" is a melancholy bug. You have heard the old saying "Last Ditch" Fight Facing Freshmen (Continued Irom page On) in spirit, but sincerely wishes thai neither class is as strong physically as were both classes last year. Th reason he hopes for weaker classes this year is that during the last tug of war a 250 dollar rope belonging to the Utah Construction company was broken completely In two. If the class presidents are able to borrow another rope from the construction company and if they are able to borrow a fire hose and some water and if they are able to get the use of Lester park, then a six weeks' conflict will be settled in favor of the superior class. W. C. Profs. Get U.E. A. Offices At the forty-sixth annual convention of the Utah educational association, held October 9, 10, 11 in Salt Lake City, two Weber faculty members were elected to serve as officers in their respective departments.Miss Ida Stewart, director of women's physical education, was elected to the office of director at large of Utah teachers of physical education. Mr. Lorenzo Peterson, who is head of the carpentry department, was elected president of the trades, industry and defense division. "Fools' names like fools' faces are always seen in public places." Other than these two suggestions all we can do is to refer you to the "Red Fly," the "Green Hornet" or the "Yellow Moth." Ed. Dear Editor: I was born, like most people, approximately 18 years, five months, and 17 days ago. When I was a few months old, my first problem arose. My parents were going to pick a name for me. I didn't want just any old name, so I submitted a request that my name be: (1) modern, (2) short, and (3) easy to spell. Those persons complied with my request very well, but since then, I have had difficulty in getting other people to recognize the true spelling of it. It is simply the tenth letter of the alphabet, and isn't accompanied by "ay". I am asking you to please spell it that way in the future and if anyone else should happen to read this, it goes for them too. Thanks, J. M. Heslop And the Flowers Are Furnished by KLENKE FLORAL 2955 Washington Blvd. OGDEN, UTAH Fountain Pen Headquarters Steve's Office Supply 2414 Washington Blvd. Weber Will Beat B.A.C THE COLLEGE BOOK STORE |