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Show THE WEBER HERALD WEDNESDAY, MAY 3, 1922. WEBER HERALD Published every other Wednesday during the- sehool yojir by the Htudents of the WelxT Normal College. Official paper of the Weber Normal College. AHdrem nil ooinmiinlentlons to Weber lertild, OriIimi, ruth. THU WKIIKIl HIRAIO KTAl'T"1 Loallo J. Chrl.-.leiiML-n . . Kditor-ln-Chlnf Alice TlppetJ) AsHOelate Eill(or-lr.-f.'hlf Alton I'Je-harrtH News Kdltor Josephine Itheea . Associate N'ewft Editor Grant LofRrnen Sports Editor l::iv Soevllle Associate Sports Editor Nan Emmetl Feature Editor Carl Gi tinn Associate Feature Editor Glndys lirown .... Ex chouse Editor Jo.sei.li Jeppson .. Business Manager l.Eiw rence Uui-nelt , Assistant. Business Ms naffer Thomas Sml r h . . 'trcuht t Ion Manager KF.PoKTERS Marlon Taylor, Gladys Green. Lou .lean McKay. Iluby Hadfield, Bonlta Scowcroft, Katherine Fisher and Glorus Mortensen. APPRECIATION ! Willi llio end. of the vei-y successful school year of 1D22 we, as a staff feel that we should like to thank all those who have assisted us so materially in makintr your school paper one of the best publications of the state. Professor Aaron Tracy, at the head of Weber's English department, has done a greRt portion of the real work of organization In the affairs of publications this year. He Is a man with h wise head for the traditions of a school and he carries his ideas where Ihey fit Into the benefit of the future of the Institution. His has been the helping hand extended from the instructors to help us in our inexperience and has given to us much constructive criticism by which we have striven" to profit. The student association as a whole has also given to us the needed support for a successful publication. As we say farewell to the school we feel that we have been greatly benefited for having been given the opportunity of assisting in this activity of Weber. oo ACORN OUT ON TIME. The souvenir year book3 of Weber was given to the student association Friday, April 28. It was very satisfactory in every reahpect and will stand out as one of the best publications of its kind which has ever been given to the students. Mr. Bush has indeed proved himself a capable man In the light of his splendid efforts in the editorship of ;thls book. He, in conjunction with Professor Tracy, prepared a system of semi-montlily- payments' for the convenience of the subscribers. He arranged for the pictures to be taken and has done a truly successful work by getting the book out one month before the end of school. Much credit is due the Acorn staff for the splendid contents of the book. The arrangement, the art work and the snap shots show the true spirit of Weber. We feel to compliment the staff upon its efforts to give us this splendid book on time. oo MORE GYM JAMS. ' We now collect a dirty sock, A collar and a cuff And hit the union station walk Because we've had enough. But we won't quite forget about The gym we've been awaiting. Though what we sometimes feel about This gym is not worth stating. We're coming back to this old school And when it once begins We want to hang around the pool And in it soak our shins. We want to break a rib or two Upon the rings and bars, Or on the carpet gently strew To count the so-called stars. Oh, there is much we'll do when we Come back into this school But in the meantime some must be Behind the frisky mule. And some of us must push a cart. And some must run a flivver, And some must hang around the mart To peddle cheese and liver. Howe'er and be that as it may When we return next autumn We hope our hopes are hopeful hopes And we have surely got 'em. GRADUATION FOOTWEAR Stunning models in white kid or linen, sport, baby Louis or French heels. The season's newest styles. Prices typical of Hirschman's $3.85 to $10.00. HIRSCHMAN'S 2473 Washington. DANGEnOlfi BUSINESS. What a dull, gray, November afternoon It was! The sky wai dark and lowering the wind came from the north in fitful gusts. waylr2 fan luafless branches of the trees to and fro and causing the brown leaves to scurry here and there, as if they were seeking some quiet nook to lie In before the long threatened snowstorm .erne and covered them up. Hob Oordon strolled slowly through the dreary, windy streets, complacency written all over his round, ruddy face. He seemed to rare very little for the romlnjr snow. The loud prals of laughter, the ceaseless chat-tor of many voices, even the wai'.s of tired babies, that had been dragged through the crowded streets with thi-ir busy "sale searching" mothers, seemed to have little effect on this seemingly young dreamer as he walked outs .' e the busy crowd. As a matter of fact, Bob was really in a curious mood, dreamy lazy mild. The previous night to him had been comparable to heavenly bliss. He had experienced his first love! He had never dreamed or wished to see such a perfectly wonderful girl! Every moment of ecstatic joy spent with her was never to be forgotten by this blissful, exultant, triumphant young lover. He awoke, at last, from his musin? to a realization of his surroundings to find the sun low In the west, a tang of rain in the air, and the large stone home, a few stops away, to which ilob's employer had sent him, staring coldly at the paesersby, laoktng ardor or sympathy for the outside world. Bob. in a normal condition (of rourse his character could not be Judged after having seen his lady love but one night previous) was a veiy prosperous young business man. His clever, quick-witted, dexterous, capable mind had gained for him his now envied position. Because of the manager's trust in Bob, he had sent him to consult with the great oil king. This was a difficult task and Bob realized it as such; but even this had not prevented this active mind from roaming over the night's pleasure with THE girl. However, Bob now came to the realization that here was the home of the multi-millionaire ana he must now represent his firm in the best of style. Walking bravely up the grey stone steps. Bob rang the door-bell before he noticed the name of the owner of this mansion which was engraved below the knocker. To his amazement It was "George J. Van Koln," instead of the desired man's name whom he was seeking. Before Bob could get away the door was opened by a tall, haughty butler, who directly asked the Intruder's wishes. Not wishing to appear absurd or foolish. Bob asked whether Mr. Brown was in the first name that had en-terod his head at that critical moment. But to his great astonishment, the butler answered in the affirmative and asked the blushing, confused boy to enter the hall. What had he done? How did he know that a Brown lived there when Van Kolen had been engraved on the outside. Well, here he was blankly following this beastly fellow into the reception hall. Because of his stupidity he must now await the honorable Mr. , what was the name he gave? Oh, yes Brown. "Oh," he thought, "here's hoping the old man, if old he is, is good natured." "Right this way, Mr. Grimm," said the Butler. What business nad this servant calling him Grimm? Who did he think he was? He was a lank, lean man, this butler, with sometnlng subtle about him: and If. Bob had been watching more closely he might have seen a glance come into the eye when he said, "Right this way. Mr. Grimm," with special emphasis on the name, "Grimm." Bob was left but a few moments to puzzle over his new surroundings when the butler the cause of all Bob's trouble started a startling conversation. "Ah. sir," Hawkes (the disturbing gentleman's name), began in a confidential tone, "I hope you do not consider this act of mine Improper " "I certainly do," interrupted the boy. "What right have you to order " "But. sir," rejoined the butler, "you did not let me finish. Allow me to explain.' "No explanation can get you or me out of this mess or whatever you want to call It. but I shall bear what sort of raw explanation you can give. Proceed!" "I nm very sorry to have disturbed you, sir. But, you see it Is this way. I sent word to our chief Sly Jim as you know, and asked for a very clever youn? man to cpme here, and then I could complete this job neatly. "But I know nothing of this,", hotly exclaimed Bob. "I shall explain all. if you will bui. permit me." said the tall man impatiently. "Mr. Van Kolen it is fortunate I have a position of answering doors for you slightly confused the name is expecting his nephew whom he has not seen for fifteen years. The young man. who is expected this evening, is coming here to get some valuable paper, that Mr. Van Kolen wishes taken out to his mining establishment. The nephew 19 going to conduct the work out there, thus will get all information from hi3 uncle. Tou are to be the nephew and are to get those papers today, and be away from here before the right boy appears." "But 1 refuse to do " "Weren't you sent here by the chief? Do you not know by now. that you are to obey orders?" replied this commander with a sparkle of scorn in his black eyes. "Besides, you are the kind of fellow that ahem I should judge would agree with ladies, i And Miss Betty Jefferson Van Ko- len'a beloved nlere. will play an important role in this pkiy into which you are about to plu nge. When the name Betty Jefferson was mentioned, Bob started. "What was this idiot saving about hia sweetheart? l!ob was about to fire out an insulting1 sentence at this creature when his better judgment made him I think. Perhaps, he thought, his Betty ; was being used in this fraudulen; , j acherne and he could be of some use j to hor, so Instead of an insulting j phrase, he 'said, "Thank you. sir. You i have restored my right senses. I was, for a moment, carried away by the immensity of the job. I shall now do my duty, however. I am at your service, sir, to do as you advise and bid. "Fine, that is the way to talk. Now, first I shall proceed to dress you as a nephew of Mr. Van Kolen would be dressed. Hurry, follow me, for the inhabitants will soon be returning. An hour later showed a very precise difference in our hero. Hawkes had succeeded well in Imitating the English nephew. Out of the bath tub rubicund and rotund, stepped Mr. Bob (Jordon. He anointed his hair with sweet spirits of lilac and dusted his anatomy with crushed rosebud talcum. He donned a virgin union suit; ;a pair of socks, silk where it showed, -ultra low shoes; white flannel trousers, warm from the tailor's goose ; a creamy silk shirt; an implacable blue coat; a gala tie perfect after five ty-ings. All seemed well for Bob as he started off on his new adventure. That evening, Mr. Percy Van Kolen awaited patiently the arrival of his uncle and cousin Betty. It was an interesting Colonial library in which he stood. An interior decorator might have called it faultless, making a virtue of its time warped silks. There were handsome pilasters tinted in yellowing ivory, and in such spaces as showed between books and picture? glimpses of Georgian wall paper, quaintly true to period. Above the bookshelves were lngravings of fighting frigates and a deeptoned, rather crackly oil portrait of the first John Van Kolen worth mentioning, showing that worthy at the dramatic moment when his signatory quill plunged down upon the Declaration of Independence. .While thus examining his surroundings Bob or Percy as he was now called, was startled to hear, "Well, Percy my boy, you have grown very much since I last saw you." A stately gentleman of five feet six inches was George Van Kolen toned in nicely wtih his ancestral setting. He was a wisp of of a man with abundant silvery hair, and as he stood straight as a post in his travelling coat the statesmanlike face which he turned 'toward the ceiling gave, superficially, the appearance of a statue falling to pieces;! and this was due to his false teeth, which were slipping down, and his spectacles which were slipping up. "Yes, my deah uncle," said Bob, vainly trying to imitate Percy's pronunciation, "I suppose I have stepped up a trifle. It's so boring, ye now, to always have to be measuring oneself, when he wishes to have a new suit of clothes. By Gad, sir, but you are looking quite well. And a how is my deah cousin ah Oh yes, Betty?""Very well," said that young lady, entering the room, ''and hbw are " She could get no farther. Astonishment, and bewilderment overpowered her. Why, was this not Bob Gordon? Her face must have betrayed her astonishment for her uncle said, "You have been surprised to see the complete change in our cousin, too, I see. Here, Betty, come and shake hands with him," "H-h-ou do you do," stammered Betty. "Ah, my deah cousin, what a chawming young lady you have blossomed out to be. Quite chawming, quite chawming." Well might any one have called Miss Jefferson charming. Some there are who call a girl's hair golden when lt'fl auburn, some when it's Titian, some when its corn-silk yellow. But have you ever seen a nugget of virgin gold gleaming out freshly from the newly broken pieces of snowy quarts, that has hidden it from the world a hundred thousand years? Eyes, black as the burial chamber of Cheops, half-veiled by golden lashes went with that hair. A face, long oval. A skin light oline, whose even color was the despair of every hand colored beauty whose eye encountered it. Small wonder that at sight of her, Percy called her "chawming." While Betty was silently wondering whether she was seeing correctly or not, the old gentleman was saying to Percy that they must both settle down to business for he Percy must bo off on the morning train for the west. "All right. Uncle Georgie, I'm ready." So the two men, after excusing themselves, loft Miss Betty to puzzle over this new enigma. "I wor.-der whether I should call Bob up," said she to herself. "Oh, you little goose. What opinion would Bob have of you if you could not distinguish him from this poor little sisslfied Eng lishman? But, oh, what a strong re-, semblance! Oh, hum, I must go and dress for dinner." j That was all the thought Betty gave! to this new arrival until after the,, theatre that night, she heard some men conversing in the dining room. 'Surely." she thought, "Uncle has re- j tired. Who can it be?" She peered through the draperies and saw Bob ; end the butler talking very quietly j and earnestly to each other. i "Good work, Mr. Grimm," she heard the butler say. "I really didn't think you capable of such clever work. Now , that you have the papers will you j please hand them over?" l Bob looked the butler fearlessly in : I the eye and said. "I propose to keep! them myself for the night." . ! A wave of anger spread over i Hawkes face for a moment but soon' he answered quietly but firmly, "Very I wll But rpmpmhflr T am instnmt- ing the work." Betty slipped noiselessly up the stairs into her room. Now she was positive of Bob's deceit, for proof she called Bob's apartment. She was told he had left early that morning and had not returned. Ah. the pang that pierced her heart! But, that was only for a moment. Bitter, hatred soon possessed her soul and she was in less than fifteen minutes working out her plan for the night. Those papers must be obtained immediately. Oh, why was she not clever enough to figure out a plan of detective work! On" hour later Hawkes and Sly Jim. the chiof of th Rung, and five other seenungiy clever colleagues of these workers, were talking furiously and seriously on a seemingly important question. "How did I know that he was not j the boy you were supposed to send j me?" hotly exclaimed Hawkes. "How did I know your plans were ehang-ed? Huh? I hope the papers are lost. Uj would be a good punishment for your negligence. You " I "Look here now, Hawkes," inter-! rpted Jim. "We've heard you storm around here enough. Now can the I gabber, and get to work. 1 know you j feel rathor humiliated because of your j doings but standing there, and fuming i around won't help you. Get your brains to working, get those papers, and you once again be the honored, wise Mr. Hawkes. Also I promise you half, instead of one-third, of the money we get after we get this scheme going." With this incentive, Hawkes returned to the Van Kolen mansion and started on his plan. He had one way of getting those papers springing suddenly upon Bob, take him by complete astonishment, demand the papers and make his get-away. In the meantime Betty had her plan as well. Instead of calling the police she would get the money herself. S- her plan was similar to that of Hawkes. That night Hawke.s was stealing stealthily into Bob's room. He touched a cold hand and then a terrifying scream of a woman broke the ghostly stillness. Before he could g-et his breath back again Bob had quickly turned on the light and was pointing his pistol at the intruders. There, before his eyes, stood the butler, angered and blushing red, and at the bottom of his feet sat Miss Betty crouched into a little heap staring wild-eyed into Bob's surprised countenance. Bob looked at his visitors and then burst into a fit of laughter that made Hawkes more furious and made him try to work a trick on Bob, but that personage was well aware of his position and foroed Hawkes to sit down on the floor. There he feasted his eyes on the funny pair until his amusement ceased and then said: "Well, by deah cousin, really I didn't expect to see so fine a cultured young lady sneaking across my bedroom floor at night. And you, Hawkes, what are you doing here? Trying to follow Miss Betty? Well, deah me, continue your little game orhide-and-seek if you wish but please do not disturb me again. Heah, I am pointing my pistol at you, and I might do something really desperate the next time you enter my room." By this time Hawkes was well aware of the predicament in -whicn ne was entangled and vainly tried to escape. "Ah, Miss Jefferson, perhaps you think some ill thoughts of your servant. To try to explain I shall tell you I have some very valuable information on hand about your would-be cousin that " "That is sufficient, Hawkes." said the humiliated young lady after completely mastering herself. Hawkes may know a good deal but she would not have her cousin who was her cousin, to the rest of the household humiliated by a mere servant. "You may leave the room.' "Ah, not so fast, my deah young-lady," said Bob. "Hawkes may stay here at present until " "How dare you be so foolish? - I commanded him to leave the room. He shall ffo. Leave the room, Hawkes," she cried in an angry voice. "Stay where you are!" thundered Bob, "or I may do something a little disagreeable." By this time Mr. Van Kolen had been awakened by the noise and had appeared upon the scene. Complete anger and bewilderment and astonishment swept over his face, when he saw his niece and butler standing in his nephew's room and being held up by that person. "What is the meaning of this?" he asked in a husky manner of voice, looking at one to another. "That is exactly what I wanted to know when I first found these peo ple in my room. "Betty, explain. demanded the old man. "I SHALL CERTAINLY explain, uncle," she said, looking contemptuously at Bob. Thav Doy is NOT your nephew, but is a thief!" "Betty, what are you Biding?" said the uncle. "She is right," broke in Hawkes. "He is not " "That will do, Hawkes. Betty is telling the story." "I beg your pardon, tr." humbly yet furiously answered trie Butler. "Yes, Uncle, that boy is a thief and this man whom you call your butler Is his colleague". I was trying to come and restore the papers when I met Hawkes and we were both at the mercy of this HEATHEN when you entered here." x Tg the can this be true?" exclaimed the bewildered old gentleman. "Hand me my papers this instant!" "Ah. just one moment, please," answered Bob. "I hold a handy little object in my hand. Ha-Vkes," said he, turning quietly on the furious man. "You call up 43-J, that is the number I heard you call this afternoon, and say what I dictate." Hawkes went reluctantly to the phone; called the number, and under Bob's direction told Sly Jim and the gang to come immediately to the Van Kolen mansion. "Fine?" said Bob when Hawkes slammed the receiver down. "Now. Mr. Van Kolen, may I trouble you to call the police here Now Hawes. my boy. no setting away and say they are wanted at your home immediately, and you. Miss Bet- t. I am rather. Inclined To think you j know my real name. Please tell it to the company." "B-o-b-o-b Gordon," stammered Betty. "Good, now tell them you are my I fiancee!" Ttiis was too much for the old gentleman Van Kolen, and he burst out; saying. "Sir, this is outrageous, how i dare you " But Bob reminded Tiim once again j of the little instrument in his hand i and commanded him to say it. After i she had done what he wished her to I do. to his great delight he command- I ed Hawkes to tell (arm the story of , the day. Just as Hawkes at the point ; of the gun had finished his story, j when in came the officers and the j gang. "I met them down the road." i said the chief of the officers; they were little expecting such delightful . companions as we have proved to be." ; "Fine, officer, now you may add this man Hawkes to your list and head i them oft to their new abode." Bob 1 said triumpha ntly. ! After t lie officers with their new company had leff , Bob politely .s;iid. , "I am rn ther fat iguei and wish to return home; Sir I'erc-jr Van Kl'n i will be arriving soon anyway and I ' do not wish to intrude." Ah, Mr. Gordon." said Mr. Van Kolen meekly, "I feel obligated er, I mean It will be a pleasure for me to give a little reward for your pains of this day." "Do not bother." said Bob. imitating the old man's haugrniy distant manner. "I really couldm bo detained so long." He politely said, "Good-evening.' and left the room. "Why, Uncle, yon horrid Stop him quick," cried lie try, thing! hurry - ing out of the room. In the avenue nfar the mansion Bob was met by a trembling, tearful little object who shyly said. "Oh. Bob, and to think I mistrusted you!" Bob melted. "It was dangerous business, but It worked all right eh, my dear?" LOU JEAN" McK AY. -oo- FAMOUS REMARKS. "Double the assignment." Miss Maughn. "I lost my book." Van Tanner. "To flunk or not to flunk, that is the question." "Winks" McKay. "Prepared." Cyril Kkins. "I was detained at the office." "Chick" Crawshaw. "We'll populate North Ogden." "Pete." "I give advice to the lovelorn." Professor "Ernie." "Ah, Heck." "Mighty" Porter. " 'Bone-Ry' is my ideal for a mate." Betty Noble. "I think marcelled hair becomes Ken." Lois. "The Acorn Payments will be due, etc., etc., etc." Leon Bush. "Who took the gum from under my desk?" Lillian Norseth. "Breathe from your diagram." Elliott Wright. "Fellow students." President Ricks. -oo- In the last Sunday morning Priesthood meeting in the Fourth ward, $1100 was collected for the gym. OK Are Scientifically Made of white lead, zinc and silica, so proportioned as to get the good qualities and overcome the faults of each pigment. The result is a paint so perfectly balanced that it resists to an ex ceptional degree the weather stresses of all climates. No hap-hazzard paddling together of white lead and oil can possibly givci the same result. Analysis given on every can. Call for a color card and further information. d GRIFFIN PAINT CO. 2310 Washington Ave. ORPHEUM CANDY . CO. For the Best Confections Dainty Lunches, Chili and Hot Chocolate For Ice Cream try our Fancy Special Dishes (Next to Orpheum Theatre) L. B. Richardson FOOT SPECIALIST Quick and Lasting Relief Walk-Over Boot Shop Old shoes are best for comfort. Let us rebuild them. BOSTON SHOE STORE 2352 Washington Ave. ALEXANDER'S CAFE Best Ever Day and Night Service Twenty-fifth and Hudson DON'T WALK Ride a NATIONAL BICYCLE for economical and lasting performance THE H. C. HANSEN CO. 2468 Hudson Ave. Bicycle Repairing Vitalic Tires flTKllfliTiI 'TTV-jm-vc-af ORPHEUM Next Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday THE r BEST of All Dog Dramas Real Soell 5 'V. In' ,Y' L' 1 Distributed exclusively by Associated First National Pictures, Inc. See the Wonder Dog of Strongheart, the For Fit For Style i For Wear THE FAMILY If 353 Twenty-fourth Street s1 'Slit I mm 1 ' GOING HIKING OR CAMPING? If so, 37ou will find the Army and Navy Department Store adequately supplied to fill your requirements. EVERYTHING IN OUTING APPAREL FOR MEN, WOMEN AND CHILDREN At the ARMY & NAVY DEPT. STORE 2303 Washington Avenue WE SERVE HOT LUNCHES ' THE SWEET SHOP Twenty-fourth and Jefferson Headquarters for Candies and School Supplies YET there's Dandy Romance The drama of one woman and many men in the hills of thrills and of a giant wolf-dog pulling between the blood-call of the wolf-pack and dog-devotion to the girl. It's from H. Q. Evarts' Saturday Evening Post story, "The Cross Pull." All Dramas Killer more than human n f r7 From wholesome Pork and Beans the student or athlete can draw health to meet the drain on his nerveus system and his muscle. Pierce's Pork and Beans are rich in food for muscle and brain, satisfying and appetizing for students, and economical and easy to prepare. For that good homemade taste get Pierce's. Sanaforllti PjcWEverlajlinlijBaAt 4Jfeh Canning Co. YOUR IDEAL FOOTWEAR M at REASONABLE PRICES SHOE STORE Ogden, Utah |