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Show Lovesick And Lonely By Elvira Droftarts Dear Elvira: I am a medium height, average looking sophomore at Weber College. I like a young lady approximately my age. The problem is that I don't know whether she is playing "hard to get" or giving me the "brush-off." Please help me, Wondering : Boy. Your case will involve a desperate move on your part, Wondering Boy. Date the girl up and then see if she will smooch promiscuously with you. If she does, your worries' are for naught. If she doesn't, buy a Bible and try the "I'm soon going on a mission" approach. We women love short affairs. E.D. Dear Elvira: I am madly in love with a fellow a few years older than myself. I have never gone out with him, in fact, he doesn't even know I exist. How can I get him to notice me? One who needs help, Patient Sufferer Discard all thoughts of a conventional approach, Patient Sufferer. Your help lies in the unusual and bizarre. First, fashion a small doll, copying the features of your beloved. Smear the doll with your favorite lipstick and scent it well with "Tabu." Sew the horse hair wig fastidiously to your lower lip, men like neatness. This treatment should be accompanied by lurid clothing combinations, purple and fluorecent Interclub Says Shafts Must Go By Marvin Protzman The adage of the ages "Turn about means fair play" almost met with disaster in a recent meeting of the Interclub Council. After one social club on the campus has already held their dance, a resolution was introduced by Sigma President Dick Nickolas to ban the activity commonly known as shafting from the Weber College Campus. Any club violating this rule would be brought before the Interclub Judiciary Council and dealt with severely. This bombshell disrupted the meeting for several minutes and immediately a lively debate ensued. The council split right down the middle with 3 of the 5 men's clubs and 2 of the women's supporting the measure. pink, for example, and Moslem-istic supplications at his feet repeating the mysterious chant found in Oriental love-lore, "1 likey you, you likey me." The best place for supplications is the group library, an attentive audience is a prerequisite.If this doesn't work there is only one thing to do. Pick the stitches out of your lower lip. E.D. Self, Fame A iiorn resiey ez Who? By Bill Murdock The world is full of outstanding people. Some grew powerful because of ambition. Chance and luck carved the fate of a great many. But the majority enjoyed success in direct proportion to the sum total of their efforts and talents.Suppose your favoritefairy-godmother tapped you on the shoulder ell ! Clubs oe k S Plan naps Asse Shut; uhlie; Marie Brown Girls look like girls again and boys are back to normal. Last week, this was not so. Thus the popular name, "Hell Week." The wierd appearance of some students readily marked them as club pledges. The final rites were conducted on Thursday night. And in some cases it almost reached that point final. The clubs have all been practicing like mad for the songfest tonight. From all appearances, this should be very enlightening to music lovers. Excelsior recently produced their bid for the assembly trophy. The diversified talent truly put the assembly into the realm of excellence. The points for the reformers included the fact that it is the duty of every club to help the rival club on events that cost money, that shafting was "childish," and that it was giving the college a bad name. The "old gaurd" defended themselves by pointing out how the hazing has kept up the spirit of competition between rival clubs. It was also brought out that while the shafts in the past had been amusing they had yet to be damaging to anything but the rival club's ego. When the tally was taken the vote was 13-10 for the measure. This fell far short of the required 45 margin and so as Interclub President Ralph Mac Entire puts it "Hold on to your hat the war is still on." SEE US! for the perfect flowers for those Special Occasions! We can helo you at a Drice YOU CAN AFFORD! r Utah Floral's Coed-Corner Presents j Suzanne Parker ! Coed of the Week i We congratulate Suzanne Parker for her j outstanding work and achievements at AVe-ber. We would like her to stop in our shop ! to pick up her beauti ful corsage. i Corsages $1.50 and Up ORCHID ROSES GARDENIA CAMELLIA IRIS UT CO 237 - 24h Phone 9106 Free Delivery Open Sundays . . . Special Student Discounts . . . The other clubs will have to go some to beat Excels. Sharmea and Alpha Rho pooled their resources for a swimming party Monday night. The Blue Knights recently announced some new officers. Bill Murdock is not president; Kent Malan, veep; LaValle Day, still secretary; and Doug Morrow, treasurer.Otyokwa and Sigma are already planning their assemblies. Corky Jones, Chairman of the production, promises a good result. The Squaws are also working with Excels on the coming Sweetheart Ball. The "Sweetheart" candidates are: Sherol Thorstensen, Shirley Jennings, Deanna Parker, Linda Shaw, and Joan Magdiel; Roger Cox, Dick Baker, Walt Hig-gens, Brent Heap, and BruceJackson. and said, "Son, I see that you have great admiration (and maybe some envy) for your fellow creatures! Now their success shall be yours because I am going to give you the power to change places with any one of them." Staggered by the impact of this power you ponder over the important question of "IF I COULD CHANGE PLACES WITH ANYONE IN THE WORLD WHO WOULD IT BE AND WHY? Dan D'Hulst I don't know, Bill. I suppose I'd want to be a person who could understand the world best, not solely to just understand the world, but that the under standing would serve as a basis for doing your share of your part in the world. I don't know of any such person that really understands the entire world, although there are many people who seem to understand part of it. I don't want to trade my place with anyone just for the sake of material wealth or for just the sake of knowing more than I know now. I guess I'm content to just be myself. Larry Atkinson This doesn't sound like me but I think I would like to be one of the twelve apostles in the Church, because I think they have a lot of authority and have a hand in guiding all the people- in tlifi Church. Keith Knighton I'd like to be my brother because he has achieved a large degree of success. He uses his imagination to bring forth his desires in life, and through this imagination and his persistence in following his dream he has attained his success. t ' Diane Rampton I'd like to trade places with Jane Wyman because she's such a great actress and she's rich, beautiful, and famous. Darlene Burroughs I would like to be Elvis Presley so I could have five Cadillacs, and I have trouble standing still so that would be some excuse. Barbara Behling If I had the chance to change places with anyone in the world, I think I would only stay in my own place because I have no more problems o r difficulties than flnvnne VJA. 1 else- n f ?ct probably far less. I couldn't better myself by putting myself in someone else's shoes because they probably would not fit once I got there. I think I would be far better off if I could just improve myself and do my small bit in the world well. FREE GAME or BOWLING WITH THIS AD! Bowl 3 Games And This Ad Will Pay for Next Game Good Mondav Thru Friday Until 5 P.M. Only This Ad Good to February 1 One Ad Per Bowler AT THE FREE GAME OF BOWLING WITH THIS AD! Bowl 3 Games And This Ad Will Pay for Next Game Good Monday Thru Friday Until 5 P.M. Only This Ad Good to February 1 One Ad Per Bow ler BOWL WITH OUR NEW. 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