Show Q 5 AN EYE TO BUSINESS A dressmaker had sent tier her ser servant arit to post a letter an I 1 m waa as anxiously anxo ial walting waiting hir her ri return turn did you post my letter all right maryt mary sho she asked as aa the maid of all work entered oh yes maam replied mary holding a penny out to her mistress what Is this for again ask asked edthe ahe fair employer 1 I 1 gave gava it to you for the stamp 1 I dian alda it have to use usa it maam I 1 put pue the letter in the box when nobody was looking explained the innocent mary his part do you have to buy many dresses for your wife haven it bought a dies for her since we have been married great scottt tell me how you jo 30 she insists on buying era em herself iva I 1 ve paid for a carload though TWO REASONS it 0 why ts is an ordinary man like ilka a ball player players 9 batea to be put out well yes and ho he likes to deac reach h home without being touched reformed flo ll 11 used to live on breakfast food but that was waa long ions ago lie he gondera now howe howa er he could mistreat his hl stomach so BO then they should move on client before ws we should decide on the house bouse my husband asked me tp in quire if the district is at au all un beal thyl house agent er cr what abat to Is your husband a profession madam client tie he Is a physician louse house agent hum er well I 1 im m afraid truth compels me to admit that the district to la not too heal thyl lon don opinion effect of the war A woman at a chandler chandless chand lers a shop chop buy a halt halfpenny penny candle was told the price wit was a raised to three farthings far things what a that for she asked on account of the war good worn wom an was the reply confound them I 1 she exclaimed do they fight by candle light punch A gallant cabman an old lady getting into a cab in grafton street in dublin was waa heard beard to say bay to the driver help me to get in my good man for m very old maam sale be IN Is matter what age you are you dont took look it glasgow herald glad it wis final for the last time I 1 tell you I 1 will never marry you im glad its the last time im betting tired of hearing it anyhow out but she ot of ill inappropriate names I 1 ever heard our landlady takes the bun said the fat boarder you mean her first name asked the thin boarder surel sure its PhYl phyllisl lial yonkers statesman A pending divorce who gets the custody of the automobile M 7 1 I told my wife she might have it I 1 cant keep up ft a machine aud aad pay alimony too their condition there was a lot of firing of pistols in the noisy crowd which collected before the policemen came was anybody hurt no although I 1 understand ault a number numb ar were mere halt shot tho the right kind of ring father 1 I rather like tho the young youna man inan who has been calling here he be has baa the right kind of a ring about him daughter oh father did you see ae it was waa it a smart set A brightening PROSPECT of woodland ways waya the poet tins ing bahen hen lancy l ancy tunes the lie its in the bursting bud the bilay breeze the birds that warble in alie trees the song bong of brooks brooka the flashing sua ura the spiders spider B web but newly spun tile the mossy bank that lures to dreams dream and all the lie rustic life that teems eema with arnal stir delight the soul Illo however wever many years may inay roll the tha hollow gatei of at life anith fth fell mischance and sorrows borrows rife when spring the arld jirld her blazing standard fast the saddest heart yield to the ilia spell apell and llope hope affirm all will be wall unexpected meeting charles Ili arles Di dichene chens taking one of hla big accustomed strolls in shadow land suddenly met mr mir face to face my dear lie he said with a beaming smile this Is indeed but mr impatiently waved him aside and passed on well reflected dickens momen harily chagrined that hurts a little but hes living up to the reputation I 1 gave cave him anyhow mixed metaphor bishop lawrence of massachusetts thinks that as a mixed metaphor from the pulpit the following can hard ly bo be surpassed one of tho the count rys clergy who wha was rebuking his flock for their apa thy declared that but a spark of grace remained to show that they were at all alive then in a parenthesis he add ed lord water that spark liftman life A distinct help do you believe in a college education 13 believe elleve in it what do you meant do you think it la Is likely to help belt a man certainly if my son bill had nev er gone to college it likely that thal he would ever have been noticed by b any of the managers of the big league clubs cluba MUTTON I 1 mra ll ashley my little girl known know mary had a litle lamb skinner bones not here perhaps at some come other boarding house bouse sarcasm I 1 rn waiting for or some chump to ask MB ate if KI I 1 think atis ala hot and then I 1 it sniff with all my might and sar ay of courso cours itts botill knew their friends johnny do you know the greek gods eoda no where Is their heir fruit storer corar between salesladies Sales Siles ladies ladles that man la is getting to be a regula customer here yes and he be must be a multi mul llon Ilon alre afre why so mayme he aln ain t afraid to ask to see bee som thing cheaper it he be feels feela so eo inclined cheaper ile he likes to make friends with dogs and children yes lie he says dogs dont want anything and children dont want much rather important Ilat patience lence does it make any differ ence which finger will puts the en ei ga gement rila oti on patrace well I 1 should rather say 11 boesl suppose he be put it on some othi oth er girls finger angert yonkers states state man modern method my books are in a very chape taape said eald the high financier shall I 1 send for an expert account ant no send for an alienist |