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Show Rose club of Portland, and this drunken to their credit the condit- MV? S?d ndf they have drunken lout of the truth. loafer, Lafe Pence ortlands women may like here in Utah we have ion that when amade attvile some the who fellow for our women and inthis respect acks upon them, seeks their society, cluded in that respect is this, that no send him on his way woman Is better for they repel him; having breathed and do not bestow flowers upon him. me air in the same square mile with The women of Utah reject what the such as he. We want them kept just women of the Rose club of Oregon af away from such people as posaccept and take to their bosoms and sible. Hence let us not contribute a here cent to Portland and its alleged exponet. Lafe Pence might come three months for and sition; let us have no truck with drunk and get would send him woman let us ask no favors of themthem; no Utah nor refrained show none until the time comes when flowers, even though he Jar from attacking the chastity of the women of another state. Utah women not believe in libel, in calumny, in slander, in the maudlin utterances The Rose of protracted debauchery. club" of Portland may have use for do but the women of Salt Lake City; the women of Utah;, the true and tried wives, sisters, daughters, sweethearts of the men, Mormon and Gentile, will never consent to permit their skirts to be tarnished by the touch of this person to whom such men, they, and this includes the highly virtuous and afraid of losing it, Rose club, shall tender us ample apologies for the insults offered. So far as Pence is concerned we want no apologies from him-- We do not want the state contaminated his presence. We want nothing to by do with him. Colorado can have him; Idaho can have him; Oregon can have him, anyone can have him, because Utah does not want him. We welcome to this state the good, the pure, the strong and the brave, but not the of other states. . Rose club sends flowers. The women of Utah believe in the sanctity o of the home and to that end, instead as Lafe of welcoming such a man What Is Home? Home is not a name, nor a form, nor Pence to their midst and giving him of a routine. It .is a flowers, as did the Rose club spirit, a presence, a Portland, would drive him away. Material and method will principle. What a nice champion of purity and not and cannot make it, says a writer decency. What a gallant knight of in the Cooking School. It must get sanctity. What a bojd warrior, in the its sweetness and from light those defense of virtue. . who inhabit it, from flowers and sunWho is he anyway? A nomad upon shine, from the sympathetic natures the face of the earth. A man without A which, in their exercise of sympathy, a habitation he can call his own. can lay aside the tyranny of the broom thing who roams around like an Arab and the awful duty of endless scrubonly the Arab owns his own tent and draws drafts upon himself that bing. o are not dishonored. A nice man is he Interest-Bearin- g who stood up and denounced the good Securities, and true women of Utah, while owing six Yielding per cent, compounded the husband of one of those good wo- twice a make an ideal investyear, men for his board while here and the ment. can be procured from They change coming out of a bogus draft McGurrin & Co., investment bankers. that he expended in soaking his hide Salt Lake City. The investor holds with whisky. Great gods of Decency the security. We do the work. is this your disciple? the off-scourin- gs . Utahs representatives did well in making a fight on clean lines. They said nothing but to tell of the advantages of Utah, while the disadvantage? of other states were let alone. Nothing was said that could provoke the anger of blood soaked, crime stained Colorado. Nothing was said of the atrocities that have been committed in the name of the majesty of good government. Nothing was said of the burning of er xsitemcnt ho statld that tho Ivurns Korncrs, Aug. 29, 1904. Mister John W. Trooth: As sum ov us wuz bavin a jovial time, 1 cent limit, in the reer ov the Kurils Hall of Justis last Tuesday a mes3ige wuz handed old Ezybot frum Joe direktin him, under Toms or-- durs, tew arrange fer a grand rati- fikation meetin at the Korners on Friday, August 2G, in onur ov the Re- publikin nomikneo fer guvner, etc. The instruksliuns wer two spare no xpens, espeshully. az the sinitur had no chois fer guvnur, al he wantid wuz a united party. Ordurs wer Ishood for 50 cents wurth ov roamin kandels, ski rokets. chasers, flour pots, .etc., en $150 worth or the elixur ov life. On Wensday .Toe kamo out statin thet Wells wuz sure tew be nominated. He dubled the ordur, sayin Kearns wuz tikled en feelin good on woodn't mind the xpens, arrangements went on swimminly en evry-thinwuz as merry az a weddin feest. A messig wuz reseeved from Kurns Ratify byes, lets have a united party fer Teddy in Utah. en kol-li- n Jo tew his offl-- s fer consultashun. We wer ratifyin on Friday at a rapid rate feelin gloryus, havin early on the elixir ov life, wen the mouse gallupd in with an order tew koll the hull thing ov, that Tom wuz maddern a bull pup en raisin politikul hell genrally, that the Trib wuz tearin its hair wile the Kurns push wer in sakcloth en ashes. It also stated that our esteem d secnyer senitur wuz on Thursda nite like an Awgust harvist moon in the last quar-tu- r thrillin to behold. Jo wuz sweld up with a grate quantity ov intens Ben wuz smilin gravesmiles. yard Jo arrivd later en bein kolkl upon fer en explanashun ov this Holy Jump- g kom-nience- Many people drink too much ice water in hot weather and are injured thereby. The fight was fair Our American Beaut v far as Utah was concerned. what of Oregon. Shall we forget her and the sweet scented dainty, pick - me - up - and members of her Rose club? Or shall we retaliate? It has been written that when smitten on the one cheek we should turn the other. But shall we? Next winter men. from that state will come here and ask our legislature to help them out with a show up there they have dubbed the Lewis and Clarke exposition. Shall go? Shall we turn our pocket-book- s inside out and take from our state treasury the money needed to make an exhibit there? Well hardly. Let us not think of doing it. Because the dear women of the Rose club ould not like it; and horror of hor-for- s think . of the danger the Rose club would be in if a few Utah men should go there during that time. We Marvel, indeed, that the Rose club escaped this time and feel to commend tbe selection made Governor by ells; who appointed only aged men. Think of what might have happened t the of the Rose club had sanctity FGung men been sent. But there is another and a better reason. We want;ta preserve thehon-o- r of our Qwman.d what man would jjnt his wife to associate with the club after-I- t had .entertained THE d re-publi- konvensliun had gon an dun ov komplyin with Kurns and insted it, wishes it had nominated a man fer govner whom he disapprovis ov, he now ordurd oil ratiflkashun off until he felt better. Old man Tuttle arose at this point an perseeded tew kongratulate Mister Kurns fer bein equal tew the okasliun. Sed he: This grate man in 1S9G with majestik tred walkd out ov the Republikin nashunul konven-shu- n en supported Bryan, a demokrit. for presidint. A man who' kood stum-mic- k that dose kin be depended upon tew bolt a state konvensliun wen it dont soot his korperosity. Small men liav no rite tew bolt, but this grate en unparalleld Amerikin statesmin, with the brogue ov his ansestors still lingerin in his crop, free en independent az a mud hen on the warm springs lake, elevates himself in all the glory ov his surlmrbin manhood, tew the full length ov his leg, en sez nit. En then a twinkel appeared in his rite optik wicli konvinsed mo that sumthin wuz koinin. I alters said he, az Mister Kurns had no chois fer guvner. The Tribune has bin rakin Smoot over the kols fer interferln In the guvnor fite, klalmln that Kurns, the senyur senatur, wuz keepin quiet. Now if Kurns had no chois fer guvner wots he kickin about? Jo Immejitly rose tew a point ov order that the questun ov the motives ov there patron saint en benefactor, the amiable-aplesent Mister Kurns, wuz a gross breech of propriety en wuz out ov order. Be 4 old Ezybot kood rule, Ilodgsen rose en sed he wood like tew accentyuate the remarks ov his lerned frend, Mr. Tuttle, az, sed he, we hav been givin tew understand that wat Mister Tuttle says about tha bein informed that Kurns had no chois fer govner wuz troo, en enyhow Kutler wuz a good man. He offurd the follorin resolution: Resolved, That the peepul ov Kurns Kornurs, in ratiflkashun meetin assembled, dew hereby extend their kongratyoulashuns tew the Republikin konvenshun fer the nomlna-shu- n ov Mister Kutler, en we pledge him our support. Old Tuttle immejitly sekonded the resolushun en kolld for the kwest-guJo jumped up red hedded en sed az the resolushun wuz an insult tew Mister Kurns, d Wen Mister Kutler wuz furst Mister Kurns, az senitur frum Utah, xpekted Mister Kutler tew koll on him en ask fer permishun, at leest tew make arrangments fer Mister Kurns' To Kurns grate astonishment Mister Kutler had completely ignord him, him a rich man en a senitur be gawd, speechless (his normal kondition) with indignashun. He dun his best tew beat him fer guvnur, en he now demanded that oil ratifying stop, at least until he had recovered frum the body bio delt him bi n the konvenshun. Sins Kutlers Tom's orders he hadnt by eny prase in the Tribune. A konsultashun or sevral polikikul doctors had bin held. Toms politikul temperature en pulse had bin takin en it wuz found he wuz In a bad state. En it wuz desided that only a strong tonik ov 13 legislature from Salt Lake Co. wood- - restore him to politikul helth. He agin insisted upon his point ov order. This long speech had wakined old Ezybot en he immejitly ruled the point well taken. "Everything Jo said gose, he sed, Wots next? he askt. Jo mooved to tender Kurns the simpa-thie- s ov the Kornurs, wich wuz kar-reeonly Tuttle en Hodgsun votitt 27-i- n. un-desto- od, n n. negroes at the stake; of itary martinet. TROUBLE AT CORNERS. BEWARE OP I6E WATER! the dynamiting of innocent men and the bringing of misery upon innocent women and children through the agencies of a despotic governor and a milso MORE Now -c- arry-me-or-I'll-faint This is the latest and best brand of beer we have on the market. It is equal to any of the imported varieties and superior to many. In fact we are of the opinion we have all competitors distanced. It is carefully brewed, properly aged and cleanly bottled and is entirely free from impurities. Try a case and you will be lAGERBEft IM( CiTT (JTAI highly pleased. men-shun- nomi-nashu- re-see- vd d, SALT LAKE BREWING CO, J. v- - MCRl I Z. Vicf'Prcs. and Manager. Hollrll family Iraito nn.l promptly atteml lo onlrrw Itloe P No. 17. y e.l no. Sumthin must be cun tew get these men awa frum the Kornurs. Tha ar disturburs en are makin, truble fer Tom.' Yours fev tho Tribs bolt, JADES SPRINKLER, 1 - - |