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Show TRUT H 10 wid ndodles th balance av th push is well fixed. in it. Hes an authoriority on th inhalin Two years from now Cog, Ill be doin widout th proper ting,, of carfy rough a mus-ta- sh to comes whin But a it makin nise. ft ft dozen a theres writin speeches Cog, owned be me erstsee th pa-apI common rayporters in th burg that can me mortal inimy, bate him wid their eyes shut. So Cog, while frind, but now do th' writin afther this an th this felly Clark, up in Montana, does yell Doo can go down below in th ham an be picturin th little protestant chapegg departmint an get up a cook lain most iviry day. Sure tis good book. fer im. Twill show th comma- spoon whin THE SENATOR AND COG. Cog, me bye said the senator, as be flecked the ashes from his three fifty Havana into a Sevres vase, marked thirty-fiv- e hundred, net, D'ye av givin' yez a was talkin knaw I Ive vacation? Ye mind? Well, changed me intintions. Dont luk so startled avick. I can change me intentions as aisy as I can a shurrut. But yell have to forego th vacation until after th' campane. Fer phy? Ill he afther tellin yez. Sure at wan time I fought th Doc d do me while roun' ye were playin an gam-bol- in av f rough th vallys th mountains, as th Marmons says, bnt Ive lamed wid grate grief that th Docs not th mon I fought hewas. Ye see Cog, durin' th time av th' sthruggle whatll land me frind Smoot in th' ainate, where hell be afther doin as I tell him all av th' time, its mesilf as has to make a few speeches begob. I hov to addriss th intell'gent voters on th Now whin burnin issues av th da-ath' Doc showed up afther th weddla thrip hes been havin I says to mesilf, I says, Theres Cog; hes been a good bye I says, Ill give him a risk I says to mesilf, says 1, Ill let th Doc write th speeches fer me whilst Cog takes a run round th state I says. Cog do be nadin a bit av a I says. So I twold th Doc to go down to th offis' an a few extemporaneous fer me to deliver up at th Park.. Says I to him Doc, me fates in yer hands an mek thim lively, fer th miners are all lukkin towards me fer somethin' good I says. Its mesilf m as wants to thim up I says. Dve knaw Cog, th Docs all right whin it comes to coachin a mon about not crossin his legs whin hes callin on a lady. I defer to his knowledge concernin th proper position av th fingers on th fork whin yer whittlin, aff a morsel av stake. Its him as can give ye th proper steer on howldin a yer atin soup f er ft Phat I want, Cog, is somethin a bit lively. Sure yed fought be th way me owld frinds recaved me at th Park I av me dearwas spakin at th est frind. An that tu whin I had fu-ne- ral planted Perry an th Doc in th hear-r-r- t av th house to lead aff: to star-r- t th' applause. Did they star-r- t it? Divil a star-r- t. Sure Perry cuddent star-r- t home widout help. Be th same token, Cog, Im thinkin Ill be afther givin him some assistance in that direction soon. An th Doc. Arramusha, he was so occypied lukkin roun to see phat an Irish miner was like he forgot I was there at all, at all. As..ye knaw, Cog, Ive no time to learn thr speeches. An I cuddent do it if I had. So tis mesilf as has' to rade thim. ' In th language av th grate Pathriik.. Henry phy cuddent he hov, been wan avth a , Protestantr- -I true fait instead-avav knaw av no way judgin th fnchoor but by th past. An th meetin at th Park was not so lively as I. cud hov wished. In fact, to tell yez th truf, Cog, twas a frost. Th min what was aff shift kem down an sat there waitin fer some wan to give thim th signal. They was only waitin for some wan to star-- rt to make a nise fer I towld th shift boss to kape an eye on Perry an although I extinded me arrums to their full lengt an raised me vice to th limit, divil a bit av hand clap did I get until I said this dyslyal felly Rawlins was an inimy to th govermint. Thin they howled. Free cheers fer th inimy to th govermint, says Paddy OShea. An be me sowl they gave thim. Sure afther th meetin was ind-e- d I called th shift boss down. Phat do ye tink th felly said? Axed was Rawlins a Fenian or a Said he tought Joe was wan av us. ft ft Whin yere writin th speech, Cog, avid annyting what might cause me thrubble. Say nawthin about th tariff, Cog. Some felly in th awjinces might get up an ax me some questions. An IN EFFECT APR. 1. 1902. I cant afford to hov anny wan frown out, Cog. Th crowds do be small enuff DEPART. For Ogdon, Cache Valley, Omaha, anny way. Cut out th- ressyprossyty. Chicago, Denver, Kansas City, St. Lave th Louis and Intermediate points 7.00 a m Th farmers all raises beets. For Ogden, Butte, Helena, Portland, trusts alone. Hanna might get a copy San Francisco and Intermediate r. av th .Dont say annyting 9:45 a m points about tk foreigner payin th tax. Th For Ogden, Omaha, Chicago, Denver, Kansas City, St. Louis and San citizens where Immostly all Francisco p m from acrost th wather,goins an they might For Ogden, Denver, Kansas City, ' Omaha, St. Louis and Chicago Cut out th 0.00 p m think I was For Ogden, Butte, Helena, Portland, An islands th av Alaska.1 Filiponies. San Francisco and Intermediate to Howells to attind th goin 10:50 points.. pm .Far Tintic, Mercur, Provo, Nehpl and av th worruk. Give part Mantl lly i y. . . , . va-cati- on di-ta- te re-mar-r- -rks war-r-r-r- Clan-na-Ga- el? TIME TABLE. - pa-ape- - . per-son- al. - 7.55 a m - For thim wather., Irri-gati- on, Cog. Flinty Provo, Nephl,' Milford, and Intermediate points 7.05 p m av ik Tell thim th.prisidint an me-sil- fll For Garfield Beach, Tooele and Terfill iviry ditch in th state, if it minus. 7.45 a m goes Repubblican. Impriss that upon ARRIVE. minds. their From Ogden, Portland, Spokane, ft ft Butte. Helena and San Francisco.. 8.S5 a m From Ogden 9.10 a m Th com-mittbeen worritin me From Ogden, Chicago, St. Louis, Kansas City, Omaha, Denver and San some this week tryin to borrow some Francisco 8.05 p m coin. I towld him that twas th other From Preston, Logan, Brigham, San Francisco, Ojgden and intermediate mons place to put up. Sure me own 0:5o p m points... .From Ogden, Butte, Portland and eliction cost me plinty. An yer board San Francisco 8.10 p m bills a large wan. An th docs. An From Calientes. Milford, Nephl, Provo and Intermediate points. 9.85 a m thin there's From Tintic, Mercur and Nephl Perry has his salary iviry 5.55 p a week. Hes th most riglar mon I iver From Garfield Beach, Tooele and Terminus 5.00 p m saw. He hasnt missed a pay day since Dally except Sundays. he come here. I towld thim me expinse T. M. SCHUMACHER, D. E. BURLEY was too great to be bothrin me about Act. Traf . Mgr. G. P. & T. A. contributions to the fund. Let Reed D. S. SPENCER. A. G. P. & T. A. y.s . City Ticket Office 201 Slain St. Telephone No. 850. cates an extraordinary movement the way of extension. It has hinted that the St. Paul, in connc. !..-- :.i ! on with forming an alliance with the (Jald interest, may seek to reach the p. rret Sound country, although this doer not seem probable. . ft ft . The blotting out of the; Oregon Railway & Navigation company by is: abarr-rman th y nder-in-chief av th sorption with the Oregon Short Line do he mon industhrioiw an seems to be an accomplished fact. In navy what be. Mixin wid th elemints what nades the economy of management one et of reformin. Sure if iver. there was a officials will handle the line from Salt class Cog what needed th. gospil its th Lake to Portland. gamblers an th beer jerkers. Johnnys all right Cog. He an th other Frederick Warde will lecture in the doing a preacher, th nagur Cog, do bewas some Salt Lake theatre on Monday afternoon grand worruk. I wish there on his favorite subject of Shakespeare more nagur rigiments in th' ax to. I'll a him Id get job prayin and his, works. It is almost supers nous Teddy to hov one raised whin I go back to say that Mr. Wards, lecture will be to th White House. ad-vertis- II 000 is looked upon as a fund which in en . ar-r-rm- . y. RAILROAD TALKS. The labor unions have assumed an arbitrary and wholly unexpected attitude toward President Burt of the Union Pacific Railroad company. Many of the unions have forwarded petitions to E. H. Harriman demanding President Burts removal. The labor unions allege that President Burt is the author of the piece-wo- rk system which precipitated the strike of machinists, and that he wants to extend it everywhere. In self defense the labor unions now appeal to E. H. Harriman, demanding President Burts removal. They threaten to strike all along the line if President Burt is retained. President Burt says that the piece-wo-rk system is not against the interests of the machinists, for by it the fast workman is enabled to earn more money. It is the slow workman he is after, who loafs on his job and still draws full pay. In answer to this argument the labor unions say that by tne piece-wor- k system wages are reduced even among the most rapid workmen, and that it is a scheme to undermine the labor unions. In this connection the resignation of President Burt is being talked about, and yet it seems questionable that E. H. Harriman should allow himself to be controlled by an influence that might extend to an unreasonable tyranny. So widespread has become the discussion of President - an intellectual treat of the highest order. When Mr. Warde visited this city last time he talked on a kindred subject A large audience was attracted and the entertainment was greatly appreciated by all those who were fortunate enough to hear it. The lecture is under the auspices of the Salt Lake Press club. It will be one of the literary treats of the year. -- ..SEE.. A Delightful Place to Visit A Profitable Place to Live Greatest Play Ground Famous Places which everyone wants to see. . Burts retirement that Effect eind September October. ft ft Banker Moffat, of Denver, has issued a public statement to the effect that the ft ft The authorized bond issue of the Chicago, Milwaukee & St. Paul railroad, which amounts to $25,000,000, is still the subject of mystery. Roswell Miller, chairman of the board of directors, is now in New York arranging to have Special Tourist Kates in Every Day During General Manager Dickinson has been forced to deny the rumor that he was to be made president of the Union Pacific, proposed railroad between Denver and Salt Lake haB been financed and will be built. It seems that the public is to be asked to buy some of the stock and bonds. This is an innovation, and carries with it the suggestion that the financiers are getting ready .to go after the money .held by the people: This plan was successfully practiced by De Lessens in the famous Panama canal swindle in France, when thousands of workingmen were robbed of millions of De Lesseps himself was an money. honorable man, but he was made the figurehead of a gang that waxed rich on the losses of the unsophisticated. There is always room for suspicion when the public is allowed to get in on the ground floor. on Earth Iuvest in a ticket to CALIFOK NIA and secure rich dividends in HEALTH, PLEASURE and WEALTH. v .... , J . . 1 o.-- . Mountain, Valley, Rivers, Lakes and Ocean Readied by THE outhem Pacific i Company's Lines. For descriptive and illustrative literature call at sell some clot an cut th price av flour the bonds underwritten. As the road No. 201 Main St, Salt LaJte Cfc an make a steak. Besides tis not has an additional $25,000,000 in its haded. .Sure Jake has a brewery an treasury, the whole amount of $50,000,- D. B. 3BAT, (faiaal |