OCR Text |
Show The Ten Commandments 1 Thou shalt keep thy mouth shut; nor shalt thou bare false witness about troop movements yea, which would aid and comfort the enemy. 2 Thou shalt honor thy president and thy government; that thy days may be long in a democracy which the Lord thy God giveth thee. 3 Thou shalt not kill ; pedestrians on the corner of Kensington and Edith, yea, verily, y it is a wicked corner, so take it easy; nor shalt thou kill time for thou must haste without with-out waste. 4 Thou shalt not steal; nor hoard girdles or rubber tires for verily if ye remembereth the adage "a moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips" thy well-being will not require a hoarded or stolen girdle; yea, if thou must use the rubber tires on thy car, remember, the slower thy speed the easier it is to drive with one hand. 5 Thou shalt not get ants in thy pants to put on a uniform only because thou art vain; if thou desireth a uniform to covereth thy manly figure, ROTC is still being taught to high school lads in this school. 6 Thou shalt wafk; if thy little legs cannot can-not get thee to school on time thou shalt arise from thy wee bed at an earlier hour each morning; even then shalt thou conserve gas and girdles. 7 Thou shalt not-sluff; for by sluffing thou shalt not conserve gas nor shalt thou conserve tires, yea, thou shalt invariably kill time and pedestrians. 4 8 Thou shalt remember Scribe day; to keep it holy, verily we say unto you, "the truth shalt make ye free" and through the 'gentlewomen 'gentle-women of the press' ye shall know the truth and be free. 9 Thou shalt not flirt with any soul but thy "steady"; verily, for the morale of the civilians must be upheld to win the war, yea, for broken hearts are as painful as broken necks. 10 Thou shalt not covet thy money; nor thy neighbor's test paper, nor Chem papers written by last year's students; verily, for the love of money is the root of all evil; and thy neighbor's test paper is evil too; and verily, we declare that even on this day the new Chemistry teacher has a new way of correcting lab experiments, yea, verily we can vouch for this fact having applied the acid test. 1 i |