Show THE BASEBALL PEST TWO KINDS OF CRANKS WHO MAKE PLAYERS VERY TIRED COBB AND DAHLCN VICTIMS Great Editor Changes His Opinion the Present Brooklyn Regarding Manager — Frank labell Sllpa Joke Over on Old Comrades By HUGH S FULLERTON TRUE COURAGE to her quite a long time Estelle — Perhaps he hadn't the courage to propose PerNatalie — Oh I don’t know haps he had the courage not to protlon pose Head on Crooked Little Paul had always been taught by his mother that God had made him and that he ought to be thankful that he had been made so perfect eyes ears feet hands and all complete His mother had bought a new cook stove and Paulle was examining It He lifted the reservoir lid and looked Jn There was his picture as natural life in the water but he was looking at it When asked by bis mother what the trouble was he said: "Dod might o’ made me persect but he put my head on trooked” Fitting “Did your nephew make a suitable marriage?” ‘‘Yes” replied the man who habitu“He ally thinks along erratic lines has curly blond hair and has never done anything more herculean than to pick flaws on a guitar and — well he married a female baseball player’’ —Puck “I body A Prudent make it a rule an umbrella” Program never to lend anysaid Mr Crowch-e- There are two types of baseball cranks that pester ball players espewho They are: the crank cially writes letters anonymously and tells the players how bad they are and the enthusiastic crank who butts In Introduces himself and proceeds to tell how good they are Ty Cobb the Tiger star met one of the latter kind on a train this summer Worse than that the fellow not only was a baseball crank but also one of these “purity in sport" reformHe held ers for cleanliness for sportsmanship and Cobb was with him Then he got to talking about tricks turned by ball players to gain advantages and he decried them aa unsportsmanlike Finally he said: “Mr Cobb I am delighted to know I have read things that gave me you an idea totally incorrect of you and I am glad to find you a your playing sportsman and a lover of clean sport” "Thank you” muttered Cobb a trifle wearily “I shall explain to my friends” stated the fan 'Tm sure Mr Cobb that as a southern you gentleman never took unfair advantage of an opa ponent that you never bumped or cut baseman intentionally with your spikes did you" “Well” said Cobb hesitatingly “not any of my close personal friends” Billy “Bullhead" Dahlen now the sedate and settled manager of the rapidly rising Brooklyn team once had something of the same sort of an adventure with a great editor It happened at that time I was working for the editor who besides neing one of the great newspaper geniuses of the country happened also to he a wild baseball crank One day Dahlen who was playing shortstop had a bad day He kicked and hooted and threw wild and did everything backward and that night the editor who had seen the game summoned me and said sharpDahlen ly: “Go after that fellow He’s a and drive him out of town loafer and a drinker” There wasn’t a chance to argue so I hunted Dahlen up and remarked that I was going to “pan the life out of him” and drive him off the team exWhereplaining the circumstances upon he remarked that be wished me success and would help me For two weeks Dahlen was criticised at every turn Then we went east and on the train Dahlen and I slipped away from Anson’s ever watchful eye and sought the buffet car and liquid refreshment While we were thus engaged the editor entered the car addressed me inquired whether the team was on the train and was introduced to Dahlen I left thwm at 11 o’clock the editor Mr “Good idea” replied Grump an umbrella “If you keep lending about there’s no telling when it may drift into the hands of the original owner" Greatly MENTAL ACCURACY Improved by Leaving Off Coffes The manager of an extensive creamin Wis states that while a regular coffee drinker he found it injurious to bis health and a hindrance to tbe performance of bis business duties “It impaired my digestion gave me a distressing sense of fullness in the region of the stomach causing a most painful and disquieting palpitation of the heart and what is worse it muddled my mental faculties so as to seriously injure my business efficiency “I finally concluded that something I quit the use would have to be done of coffee short off and began to drink Postum The cook didn’t make it She didn’t boil it long right at first enough and I did not find it palatable and quit using it and went back to coffee and to the stomach trouble again “Then my wife took the matter in hand and by following the directions she had me on tbe box faithfully drinking Postum for several days I knew to remark that “When I happened I was feeling much belter than I had for a long time she told me that I had been drinking Postum and that accounted for it Now we have no coffee on our table “My digestion has been restored has come and with this Improvement sense of relief from the oppressive of the heart fullness and palpitation that used to bother me so I note such a gain in mental strength and acuteness that I can attend to my office work with ease and pleasure and without making the mistakes that were so to mo while 1 was using annoying coffee "Postum is the greatest table drink of the times In my humble estimation” Name given by Postum Co Battle Creek Mich Read the little book “The Road to Wellville” in pkgs “There’s a reason” Ever rend th above letterf A now one appears from tlmo to time The? are malar tree Bad full of humaa latcroat ery it In the Clutches of the Pest ordering more beer and talking baseThe ball with Dahlen following at my morning the editor stopped berth “I was much mistaken In that young man Dahlen” he remarked “He is and interesting a smart Intelligent young man I believe these stories about his drinking have been exaggerated I fear we have been misled by I wish you would the talk of cranks write a story suggesting him as the Ty Cobb logical successor of Captain Anson as the manager of the team” Dahlen was during his Chicago career a pestiferous player toward the umpires and one of the worst nagHe has grown gers in the business sedate and conservative and is friendbut ly to some of the umps nowadays when young he gave all the umpires and Uncle Nick Young more trouble than any player since his time One day on the West side Dahlen approached Hank O’Day who was the umpire and remarked: “Say Hank if I run at you in the first inning and call you a blank blank blank and step on your toes with my spikes and push my glove into your face what’ll you do?” “Do?” said Henry getting rolled up I’ll chase you off the lot faster "Do? than you can run” Dahlen "All right” said calmly I just want to get “no hard feelings put out quick so I can get to Harlem on the In time to get a bet down fourth race” “Huh— Say "Huh" said Hank you can't get put out of this game in a thousand years not if you spike me In the face” Nor could he although he did everything he could think of O’Day made him play out the siring and the horse he wanted to bet on won the race at heavy odds welcomed by men who Particular men who smoke realize offensive to people of refinement strong tobacco breath and how objectionable to themselves Is that “dark brown taste” In the mouth after smoking Paxtine Toilet Antiseptic is worth Possibly the best Joke of the entire its weight in gold for this purpose baseball year was the one that Frank Just a little in a glass of water of alone now owner and manager Isbell the Wichita team slipped over on his —rinse the mouth and brush the teeth The mouth is thoroughly deodorized old comrades the Chicago White Sox The Sox were to play an the breath becomes pure and sweet this spring ft delightful sense of mouth cleanexhibition game at Wichita and lssy and had made great preparations for their liness replaces that dark brown toAlso he thought they had i bacco taste coming is far Paxtine — another sense of humor superior to liquid anwhich was tiseptics and Peroxide for all toilet mistake lssy prepared a great feast at hli and hygienic uses and may be obtained at any drug store 25 and 60c a box home and served to his old friends on the Sox team a beautiful repast or sent postpaid upon receipt of price Co Boston by The Paxton Toilet During the dinner the Sox were telling of the wretched umpiring they Mass Send for a free sample had been getting and how every GOOD WORK WELL SUPPORTED In the little cities thought himself duty bound to help his team beat “I've People Are Liberal in Their ContribuIssy remarked big leaguers exhibeen having trouble here in the tions to Young Men’s Christian bition games I’ve bad one of the BRAIN MUCH (HADN’T SMOKE how is a reg- Anoclatione lie— That fellow morey than brains She — That so? I lent He— Yes this morning Las him more got a ten spot The Tragic Difference William was lying on his bed face downward sobbing desolately' His mother took him in her arms the In a few whole eight years of him minutes she learned all It was a girl and she bad seut him a note This year Young Men’s Christian associations are likely it is said to all records in amount of money for new buildings The success It read: at Philadelphia hen $1030000 was “Dere Willyum: secured in twelve days has given stim“I luv yu the best But Ilenery givs ulus both to Young Men's and Young me the most kandy — Isabel” — SucWomen’s associations Added to it cess Magazine ' was the $2000000 campaign for building in foreign Brooklyn capitals New Fishing Industry women with the aid of a few men Albicore fishing in Nova Scotian wahave just secured $415000 Atlanta ters has become interesting but for men $600000 Reading $217000 financial reasons These fish frequentElyria Ohio $127000 where the comly weigh over 500 pounds and Are mittee asked for but $100000 Charlesknown as horse mackerel A number ton S C $160000 Raleigh N C were shipped to Boston last season $75000 Walla Walla Wash $48000 The average price there is three and Mich Associand iBhpeming $22500 cents per pound Formerly ation leaders say three things help these fish were considered a nuisance them In' getting these large sums to the fishermen Christian unity a short and public apin peal 'and real results accomplished Garfield Tea will regulate tbe liver giv- break raised buildings The Cay Dahlen Wanted Out of the Game to Be Put but Detroit umpires league kicked on him and the other teams too He was pretty bad soI got anI think he’s other fellow for today all right He liver here and has umpired a lot of amateur and college He’s a man worth a quarter games of a million dollars he stands high in society and church circles and in business He thinks it an honor to umpire this game and I hope you fellows won’t kick” They didn’t kick The umpiring was Then fine up to the ninth Inning Id Wichita was leading by one run the first of the ninth with a runner ball the on bases Smith hit Frank half a mile over the left field fence and put the Sox ahead Up to that time the Sox had been much pleased but w'hen Wichita with the umpire went to hat for the last time things The umpire began to call changed balls regardless of where they were He walked three men then pitched another and forced home a run The Sox grew mad and Smith turned on him “What are you trying to do?”' be de“Steal this game?” manded “Why Mr Smith” said the promin distressed and sur-inent citizen “Mr Isbell explained to tones prised me that you wanted to lose this gamp to him to give his Wichita team a good had Toxy Issy both the umpire and the Sox andhe Instead of seelt ' won the game joke the Sox got mad already erected CRIMINAL Perhaps the most remarkable catch made anywhere during the season ol 1310 was made by Carlisle of tbe Vernon team of the Pacific (coast league on the San Francisco grounds early In The catch was made possiOctober ble because it started in a joking tribute by Carlisle to the bitting of “Ping” Bodie the slugging outfielder of the Frisco team who came near breaking world’s records for home run hits during the season The San Francisco grounds are sib uated low and surrounded by great fences' “some of them as tall as the the houses that adjoin park At points the fences are nearly fifty feet high yet Bodie kept driand over fences ball ving the signs high screens until it got to be a regular thing and a source of joking among the fans and players alike The the from Vernon team came down north with the Frisco team and they stopped to play a series on the Mission street grounds It happened that while the team was away painters had been putting some new lettering on the above fence and one high signs tali ladder remained propped against the fence In right center field The ladder was left there and after Vei non had batted and failed to score Carlisle Jogging out to hfs position saw the ladder and thought of a Joke Two were out when "Ping" the hero of Frisco came to hat Carlisle Jogged back to the fence and climbing about twenty feet up the ladder turned his face toward the field The bleacher crowd appreciated his tribute to Bodle's hitting power and laughed and cheered and the crowd In the Bodie stands took up the applause swung wickedly upon the first ball Carlisle thinking he had pitched dewas the Joke far enough carried scending the ladder when he saw the far ball coming toward the fence He turned scrambled above his head ten feet up the ladder clung to a round with one hand and stretching out the other caught the ball The catch caused a long argument but it was allowed and then the umpire stopped the game until the ladder was removed (Copyright 1811 by Joatph B BowUa) AND HAIR Cutlcura Soap and Ointment do so much red for poor complexions rough hands and dry thin and falling hair and cost so little that it is almost not them criminal to use Think of the suffering entailed by skin troubles — mental beneglected because of disfiguration — physical cause of pain Think of the pleasure of a clear skin soft white hands and These blessings are often good hair only a matter of a little thoughtful timely' care viz:— warm baths with Cuticura when necesSoap assisted with sary tur gentle anointings iW j yntl The latest Cuticura Valuable guide to skin and br 1th will be mailed free on niftftlcation to the Potter Drug & iem Corp Boston Mass It sometimes happens that a woman marries a man because she Is sorry for him But is not that a poor way to show her sympathy? Mr Winslow’ Sooth In nyrup for Children teething softens the gums reduces allays pain cures wind colic 25c a bottle There is no fool like the peacemaker who interferes between husband and wife QUENCH A pmlul Ooui (ml sod fnitontlp Uka thostma out of corn and bunions It’a llis ol ftreatrat com ibo age Alton'storiFootdUcjsvgry tight or new shoos fool ui It is a certain relief for ingrowing nml tired aching foot storing oslionssnd We have over 80lMM)tenUmonlJ TM ¥ Bold wijibwi IT i Bent l not accept any snbsitlaD mail for Uo in stain pa TltTAT IACHAC1 ETDfTK? aent by tneiL rlilalo motii Rit guay’h hwfpt f POtl)J£ltM9 the best medione SVi!!£V FeverUh ALLEN DAISY sickly xnirlt Trial ri V SUMMER Kil l FI! men look upon laws to be broken as things hr AAirmm La Y JW pIsMd ywWvafr treat au Kite Neet dcu ns lsetsdlwme luTtapUl m M4aH tip over injure tayihtaa Guaranteed etnl-all htlm w ir prrpaM lor ttoasas iw SrUaBI 1 deceptive disease— thousands have It and don t know u- lf f11 want good results yon ran make no mistake by using Dr Kilmer's t the great kidney remedy At druggists In fifty cent and dollar sizes Sample bottle bv mall free also pamphlet telling you how to find out lf you have kidney trouble Address Dr Kilmer A Co Binghamton N T KTTyNFY TROUBLE Pro mndn tn patentii PATFMTQ Portimeaare Hir iHIhiilwAicci yourDog'teash Hanblngton page lunik fr D C Fitzgerald The Kind You Have ALCOHOLPER CENT Avertable Preparation for As similating Ihe Food and Regulating rhe Stomachs and Bowels of Always Bought Bears Signature Promotes Digestion of neither nor Mineral Opium Morphine Not Narcotic tf Old DrSAMl’ElflrCMER Heapr Pumtfu' jltx Rothtlh !i? Satj In f¥ppnrwU Sent Cforjtfd Syya Wmkrfm fMvw THIRST Used to It to Thompson — Wouldn't you hate have death staring you in the face? Johnson — No If you’d seen my wife stare you'd realize that death's has no terror to me”— Harper’s Bazar Bold Children PckngaFRFE OLMHTKD For Infants and Children Use A perfect Remedy forConstipa-lioSour Stomach Diarrhoea Feveri Worms Convulsions and OF SLEEP For Over Loss Facsimile Signature of Twx Next time you’re hot tired or thirsty drink glass or a bottle of this one best beverage — delicious refreshing or At carbonated in bottles — 5c everywhere Write to the CO Atlanta Ga for a copy of their booklet “The — you will Truth About find It interesting A Foot— Jlsm iA'Aw iMwdyrs Don’t pour a lot of Ice water Into you la order to quench the thirst for the moment— not only does it not produce the desired result but it is bad for you There is Just one beverage that fits all conditions of heat and thirst— gome merely E Into Yon r Sltoen the lor ibo feet antlsapiN It nlm powderivolltiL etnartin tendsr FOOT-EAS- Shake Altai's MiSIJk The Passing of the Wife We have known for some time that We have he wife would have to go held off aB long as poBsible the moment but it might Just as well be over with at once The wife was a very desirable article while she lasted She mended the hose and did tbe housework when and sat up patiently and necessary A useful waited for hubby’s return person certainly— one to love to honor and obey Now the suffragette age is upon us and the wife is rapidly becoming says Life jytjfew more years she will be exhibited In museums Adieu madam! We respect your memory! TO ALLEN’S and bilious ing freedom from attacks It overcomes constipation NEGLECT OF SKIN ular Cleanses the System effectually Dispels colds and Headaches due to constipation Best for men women and children : young and old To get its Beneficial effectsalways note the name of the Company California Fig Syrup (o plainly printed on the front of every package of the Genuine Centaur Thirty Years Company NEW YORK Guaranteed under jhe Food of Wrapper and) Exact Copy emtaum aoMMinr nt an rrv Riches in Knlcker — Brown counts his seven figures Bocker— Perpendicularly? wealth METALL Garfield Tea overcomes constipation there Anyway nous about the is nothing weather monoto- Drop of Blood Or little water trom th human system when thoroughly tested by the chief chemist at Dr Pierce’ Invalids’ Hotel Buffalo N Y tells th of impoverished blood — nervous exhaustion story Such examinations are or some kidney trouble made without cost and is only a small part of the work of the staff oi physicians and surgeons under of Dr R V Pierce jiving the best the direction medical advice possible without cost to those who wish to write and make a full statement of An imitation of natures method of symptoms restoring waste of tissue and impoverishment of the blood and nervous force is used when you take an alterative and glyceric extract of root alcohol auch as without the uie Dr Pierce’s Golden Medical Discovery Which make the stomach strong promotes the Cow of digestive juices restore the lost appetite makes assimilation perfect invigorates the liver and It is the great purifies ftnd enriches the blood It makes men strong in body active in mind and restorativs nerve tonie and cool in judgment Get what you ask for I Railroad Workers Stone Workers Miners Farmers— AH yon men who do heavy work th kind of that’ hard on ahoea— you can mak toot work thoea hat twic aa long by protecting to he counter and heela with metallic heela Lighter thaw leather Bought ready attached to work ahoea or If your dealer quickly fitted oy any cobbler write ua Your aupplied inquiry bring a booklet tat ta't UNITED SHOE W N U Salt Lak City No 1 91V |