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Show - "f & PAGE TWO - - P R o V o (UTAH) EVENING HERALD: WE DNESDAY, JUNE 15, 19 3 2 Proclaim liberty tbrosftaovt tf Und Th Llfert7 Deft A SCIPPSCANnELD NEWSPAPER Every Afternoon, except Saturday, and Sunday Moraine Published by the Herald Corporation, N. Gunnar Hasmuson, president, 60 f South. First West Street, Provo, Utah. Entered as second-class matter at the post-office post-office in Provo, Utah, under the at of March 8. 1879. ' Oilman, NlcoH It Ruthman, National Advertising representatives, New York, San , Francisco, Detroit, Boston, Xos Angeles, Seattle, Chicago. Subscription terms by carrier in Utah county, 50 cents the month; JZ75 for six months in advance; $5j00 the year in advance; by mall, in the county, $4.50; outside Utah county, $&00. J. A. jfrtinmm y npT Is. H. RMaMuon, Managing Editor. - I-?".' ..W.l .... .. i ..... II. . - ... ' ' Scrip prCif fold When Taxes Overtop Profits How far taxes have eaten into the life of Americans is illustrated by the fact that in cine western state last year faxes amounted to MORE than the net profits of the 15,000 corporations doing business in the state. This state happens to be Texas, and the tax happens to amount to $200,000,000 but much the same story can : be told for any other state. And business cannot recover under those conditions. Drastic economies still are necessary before any general revival re-vival can take place. -.. ' Observations Most spring garden plots turn out to be worm-and-weed conspiracies. Maybe it'd make it easier if they'd label the internal revenue collector's office "Ye Olde Taxxe Shoppe." - Today's Observations by the OBSERVER Jim Marshal, Editor Western Features The first thing to be done is ap- them would be turned loose in the point a committee of scientific house and the senate and each fellows and this committee will j would spent four days explaining choose the biggest nut in ' each congressional and senatorial district dis-trict by a process of elimination then these extra-special selected se-lected nuts will be elected to congress con-gress and shut up with no one around for six months before! they are dispatched back to Washington:'" Washing-ton:'" ' ' this will give them time to get their particular ran of rmtti-nesa rmtti-nesa well developed . . . we're 1 telling vou about the Marshall Plan for saving the country coun-try ... f " - . Well, just before congress meets each selected nut will be given several oceans or gigantic figures to piay with t .totals of all the foreign debts and national aebts and the billions bil-lions handed out to railroads and banks and th total of "farm mortgages and world wheat pro duction in bushels figures and giving the selected ones millions and millions of statistics sta-tistics will make them furiously happy and excited in this state they will be entrained en-trained for Washington ... : - .By the time each closely-guarded . nut reaches the capital 7 the i figures would be swimming around in his head and, he would r, Jiave evolved-a perfectryetoder- v ? ful - scheme for bringing ' back :; prosperity- .'" " ' then jM the "nuts hundreds of his scheme to the rest all the time they'd be fed more figures and their schemes would grow nuttier and nuttier and it would be-a babel with 400 schemes all being shouted at the same time It would be perfectly safe because be-cause a scheme is always a religion relig-ion to a nut and he simply won't listen to any other scheme and it's useless to bribe him if all the lobbyists were turned loose they couldn't influence one single nut one particle and some of the lobbyists would be torn to death by infuriated schemers and THAT might be all to the good too Well, the result of all this would be that the nut congress would stay back there talking itself nuts simply can't live withouHblack" in the face for months and months K meanwhile there'd be no laws passed wnatever ana wnai a blessing that would be! and as long as the statistics held out and the nuts were allowed al-lowed to talk the rest of the country could go ahead about its business V AND, LISTEN: If anyone is bveKing t auiutuie nut jiiuii -vhib section this department has ft.- Howdy, folks! There is some talk' among insurgents at the Chicago convention of forming a third arty. What is the use of a third party when the country doesn't kno'v what to do with the two parties it already has? ffr 3f 3fi Sfc A thjrd party gets its name from the way it generally finishes when an election is held. WHO'S WHO AT CHICAGO This is Obe- diah J. Potplo, who got up on the floor of the convention hall at Chicago this morning, a n J In masterly fashion sw e p t all before? htm. (Note: Mr. Pot-pie Pot-pie is one of the best Janitors in the business.) Nearly 200,000 male students graduate from college this month, so that solves the office boy problem. prob-lem. Catching bootleggers is like catching trout. The biggest opes always get away. PARTING SHOTS ' You're so dumb you'd try to beg a ride from - a six-day bicycle racer!" Li'l Gee Gee will now sing the Ship Carpenter's Spring Song-Oakum, Song-Oakum, Gentle Springtime! Throw out the life-line! Sft 3fr ART SHANNON. I ;nmniiiii:mn;mt;mtr: DESERET MORTUARY CO. 3 ""Service Above AIT V"8fl tthe ;i names of 81 on file and : will be '4 p MONSON. Dlst Mgr. pleased to submit them to '. any j scientific body, that's . interested. ,'Why'Pay More for Less? 1 1; ' Lady Attendant. Phone-45 - Provo, Utah THE OPENING OF UTAH COUNTY'S CANYON NIGHT CLUB . - v- ?- , . : . jr. i.. I V Special CSBiicken isiners A - ; -' " - (Dixie Fried) JDriiniks airidlwiclhies V,-. :K WE CATER: TO CLUBS A ND PRIVATB PARTIES Take;the Moonliffht. Trail to;tle Falls! ilMf""-v-- ". (Right Reserved to Limit Quantities) L 35c mm oil - - OLD ORIARGATE GltiGER ALE 2 for 2ic 75c MEAD'S DEXTRI f,1ALT0SE 57c 25e BORDEN'S EAGLE BRAND MILK.. 18c $1.25 S. H. A. BABY FOOD. 09c 51.00 OVALTIfiE ........ S9c 85c tlELLIN'S FOOD ..." 1 03c 32c geia Nurser, 8-0unce Complete 23c S 1 .C3 HESTLE'S FOOD . . 83c 25o -PEROXIDE He EXTRA SPECIAL 35c New Stock (Limit 2) 17 BABY NEEDS 13e 59c 6.1oil25c 23c II(UNIC BABY TALC 65c WALGREEN .MALTED 1Qn Mll.K Pniind "XJ1. 25c ZINC STEARATE b5c ORYCO ANTI COLIC NIPPLES. r.j 35c INFANTS' w 4QA SUPPOSITORIES;'.".. "JLifC 25c MENNEN'S BORA TED -TALC. . talc ,; - 19c 19c DENTAL liEEDS 6dc iiiifw4 a TOOTH PASTE. . 25c COLGATE'S DENTAL CREAM 50C PEPSODENT TOOTH PASTE. . 5CC IPANA TOOTH PASTE. . 50c PEEECO TOOTH PASTE. . Sc IODENT TOOTH PASTE. . 50c KOLYNOS DENTAL CRE,M 25c ORLIS TOOTH PASTE 25c LISTERINE TOOTH PASTE. . sic 19c 3ic 29c 31c 37c 33c 2 for 25c 14c ? 3c mm MID ALiOHS OREAtt . . - 75c Ejllrose'Theatrical Cream. Lb. 49 60c D, A E COLD CREAM . .... 39 $5c TJBQSrTXLA ..,..,ftrfc..1. . .2? 50c JERGENS LOTION 60c -IONSS JBREAMS C . 25c MAVIS TALCUM : 19 35c DJER KISS TALCUM .17 75c ANGELUS ROUGE . . : . . . . . .53 35c MUM . . . . - . . . . . . I . . r. . 29 50c Cream of Almonds Lotion 23 50c Mary Lake Lavender Lotion 23 60c WALGREEN SHAMPOO . . . .29 50c VASELINE HAIR TONIC. . .37 60c Mulsified Cocoannt pil Sbampoo39 35c. KLEENEX CLEANSING; TISSUES.. .. . I ... 21c B !l A w YJM 4 10c 25c 1 1 ("" ' tfwim 'nn.um!iuiiuiijnjui n. nin. w mi V'sQwiHl - ail It. This Is the sale you have all been waitinc for . . Hin.Hrd r lifmc in every department of our stores reduced to new low levels for this BT SI. 50 PETROLAGAR SSc 50o WALGREEN MILK OF MAGNESIA. 27c 60c BR0H0 SELTZER SSc I 50c VITOH HAZEL, Pint 50c UNGUENTME SI. 25 PIIliCIIAr.rS COfilPOUHD SI. 00 RUSSIAN MINERAL OIL, Pint SI. 03 KUJ0L ..: eOc CALIFORNIA SYRUP OF FIGS 40c CAST0RIA 1 . 29c i 39c m 8c 47c 60c EXTRA SPECIAL 5c CRYSTAL WHITE SOAP 10 for 25c 30c SAL IIEPATICA 60c SAL IIEPATICA C. R. W. ASPIRIN TABLETS. 24's Saf.-i;! C. R. W. ASPIRIN 1ADLI.1S, ACIDINE $1.25 S. S. S. TONIC PSYLLIUM SEED, Pound Bag 35c JAO SALTS 85c KRUSC1IEN SALTS , 25c CASCARETS 25c IODINE $1.00 OLAFSEN'S COD LIVER OIL. 1i 19c 38c 19c 10c 49c 89c 49c 69c 63c 19c 17c 69c ALE F Cocoa Almond, Les Fleurs, Olive, Levon, L. & K. ,37$ lot Bars 19c ' At am? DOUBLE , DECK, ICE CRSAM-SODAS, Chocolate Choco-late or Fruit . 4AA Flavors PHOSPHATES VtJ.4 '-t-- Bcer Wild Lime, ; waa -.s,.-Hhtrryl 'fiinccc'.'.JUsu Jtt ZTjZ DOUBLE RICH MALTED MALT-ED MILK, served -f Cn with Wafers... . PIE Your Favorite Kind, 10n A La Mode.... JLUC Quart Brick Ice Cream, Flavors . . .. . ...35c Black Walnut, Pineapple, Sherbet, Fresh Straw . ; berry Pecan. - w"- -a- 1 SI 10O CIGARS standard Brands 5 for 40c Bos of 50 $3.05 WILLARD CIGARS :-- tK Price 't'iS &C0B.9'. ,S f or;10ciHx or 25c -A - Box of 50 $2U50 -j . Boa of-50 f3.lV . 5c CIGARS LItUt RjunOnrEl Modelo, LkSnprema j ffaj "1.5C and Alaan.. ............(.... ,. SPECIAL OFFER Six 15e Tins LUCKY. STRIKE CHESTER FIELD, CAMEL and OLD GOLD CIGARETTES . . Per Package. . . . ,l. . t. iT. ; ; . , - PACKAGES --aic.;.,. -4 ; - f . CARTOON, $U2 . 16c .Half and Half Tobacco, 2 Pack- 'aces Pipe Cleaners and Pipe ALL FOR 99c iii"oiwujwj , ,a v. 8pr A Palmolive, LUX, Camay 3 Bars 3LSC 1 l II lie 16c , A 23c 11 i 35c TIZ CORN REMEDY 23c CASTOR 0!L 25c FSOM SALTS. Pound Can COc CALDWELL'S SYRUP OF PEPSIN. 50c N. R. TABLETS 25c ANACIN TABLETS $1.00 ZONITE -. MEKCIIRO- . CHROME 75t DOAN'S PILLS 25c GLYCERINE 25c CASCARETS 25c BEECHAM S PILLS 27c 17c 16c li 47c 39c 19c 79c 17c 49c 16c i9c 19c m. h&4 t .TAOO I & 8 Lifebuoy Soap 2 for Woodbury s Scan 10c Sayman's Soap 3 ; 23c 35s Texcel Sanitary raus ic 50c PHILLIPS' MILK 0F on. ESIfl... Z3C 50c MENNEN'S Shaving CREAM 39 65c BARBASOL 43 35c OEM BLADES ..27 50c INGRAM'S Shaving Cream ..39 60c MAN O'WAR Shaving Cream 32 C $1.25 PINAUD'S VEGETAL ....98 50c PEAU DOUX P-V SHAVING CREAM dm lUl 50c ALL-PUR- O (aw Cf POSE TALCUM. . dm TOl 9UC 1.49 TWINPLEX STROPPER $1.29 35c PALMOLIVE Shaving Cream 23 50c JAVA : PACE POWDER with Ronge Free ...., 29c AIRCRAFT ELECTRIC FAN, s-inch Blade IM POUND ELECTRIC FLAT IRON PEAU DOUX PLAYING CARDS BOX STATIONERY, Values Up to $2.50.... , $1.69 SSc 23c 39c $1.50 BLUE BIRD ALARM CLOCK... SHINOLA HOME Danber and Polisher 77c SET. 23c $1.00 PINT THERMOS THER-MOS BOTTLE 77c MODEL C. HAWK EYE 89c GOLF BALLS 25e-3 for 69c ScSfSU... 42c-3 for GOLDEN CROWN PROFESSIONAL '' ' ".. ZSSs 55c-3 for $1.65 BAG OF 100 Y GOLF TEES lyC': Srs............ 98c and ll98i ?SSSrS ...v 35c-3 for 1.00 -4 |