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Show Wished He Was Jones. One of the applicants for a consulate in Japan while James 0. .Blaine was secretary of state whs the late Samuel Kimberley, of Baltimore, who died in the service in Central America. After he had presented his credentials, Mr. B'aine Baid:, I should like to appoint you, Mr. Kimberley, but 1 have made it a rule to recommend no one who does not speak ' the language of the country to which he is sent. Do you speak Mr. Japanese?'1 "Certainly, Mr. said Blaine." Kimberley; "ask me something in Japauese and I will answer yon. Mr, Blaine had not a word to say, but 1 he Japanese poet went to another man, all the same, and Kimberley went to Central America. Oue day Kimberley met a young woman, who threw her arms impulsively around his neck and kissed him. Seeing her mistake a le drew hack aud angrily asked: No, Aren,t yon Mr. Jones? bowmadam, replied Kimberley, ing; Im not, but 1 wish to thunder I was, Ex. A - Flandish Attack. An attack was lately made on C F. Collier of Cherokee, Iowa, that nearly proved fatal. It came through his kidneys. His back got so lame he could not stoop without great pain, nor sit in a chair except propped by cushions. No remedy helpeb him until he tried Electric Bitters .which effected such a wonderful change that he writes he feels like a new man. Turn cures backache and kidney trouble, purities the blood and builds up vour health. Only 50c at J. L, Townshends Drug marvel-inedici- ne Store. Tne. officers of the cable steamer Minia. which ta now endeavoring in midoceau (o locate and repair a broken cable 1,500 feet below the surface of the water, state that their instruments show the bottom of the oceau to have a temperature below the freezing point and that there is a total absence of light. The officers say that a great many of the deep sea fish are so pecnliafl constructed that they often loose their lives by chasing the instruments toward the surface. They die by what experts call falliug upward. As soon aa they get ont of their accustomed level the decreased pressure extends the air witbtb them and the fish sLoot to the surface, bat are dead before they reach that point. Detroit Journal. Atchinson, Topeka & Sante Fe Railway Company. The direct line from Utah to Kansas City, Pt Joe, Chicago, Galverton, City of Mexico and all points in New Mexico and Arizona. First class psaaenger service, two daily trains Vis R, G W. R. R. Dining cars, Rtanard and Tourist Pullmans, Electric lights, chair cars. Rock ballart rood bed, Grade Crossings, in fact all the luxuries aud safety appliances of modern times. Fur maps, etc., cal! on or address W. H. Bbermer, Agfc K. G. W. Payaon or C. F. Warren, Gen) Agent, A. T, & S. F 411 Dooly Block, Balt Lake City. . An Ingenious Exolanation. Mrs. Hendricks: See here, Diuab, 1 gave you four flannel undershirts in the wash this week, and you have brought back only ' three. How is that? Dinah: M Deed I dnnno. maam, lessn dey slirinked. Flannel does shrink somethin awful maam . Exchange. Friendly Criticism. now did you ensermou this morning, Dr. Thirdly joy my deacon? Jones I enjoyed a portion of it very much indie J. Dr. Thirdly What portion of it did you enjoy most? Deacon Jouea That part where yon said: And now, brelhern, one word moreaiid I have finished. Chicago Record. Deacon Knowing Woodpeckers. ON EVERY BOTTLE Bn A Chicago professos, who has been in the Maine woods this summer, tells an interesting story of the intelligence of a family of woud peckers, whiuh he encountered near the bead waters of the Allegash, and which were must uncommonly bright Lir.l. Aa everyoue knows, who has observed these birds at all, they feed on the worms which burrow into trees. A worm witu a fair amount of activity can bore a gallery three or four feet loug iu a tree iu a single season, so, ta find his prey, the woodpecker has to make several holes iu the tree in order to get at bis victim. This particular family of woodpeckers, haviug some difficulty iu getting at the worm after they had drilled a hole into his gallery, proposed to save themselves nauesesssry wirk. And what do you think they did? In the Allegash woods grows the "Indian poke, a plant with berries possessing an alkaline juice particularly disagreeable to all auimal life. And so these woodpeckers, Allegash havijg made an entrance iuto the dornaiu of the borer, proceed next to drop berriee of the Indian poke iuto tbe opening. Aud so much does the worm dislike the odor ut the poke berries that he comes out.to get away fiorn it, tbiid iucideully to see who has had the impertinence to cause him so much discomfort, lie never gets su farther than the eutrauce, because Mr. Woodpecker is wailing there, anil .hat worm is gobolei up bo quickly that he uever knows wmt isppeueJ to him. This Beams like a good deal of a fairy story, doesnt it, but professor Eastman J. Clarke says he saw it with his owii eyee. Chicago Post. Ha fooled The Surgeons- - All doctors told Renick Hamilton. of West JeffernO'i, O., after suffering 18 months from Rectal Fis'ua, he would die unless a costlv operation was performed; but he cured himself with Buck-leArnica Salve, the best in he World. Surest Pile cure on Earth . 25c a box, at J. L. Town-fchenDrug Store. ns ds Transposition Necessary. Grand pip," he began, tnrning the leaves of his book, did your history used to say that tbe SpanI iards settled this country? believe it did my boy. Well, the new ones wont sav that, What will they say, Ostend? This country Fettled the Spaniards. Exchange. : a 1 I had bronchitis every winter for rears rnd no medicine gave me permanent relief till I began to take One Minute Cough Cure. I know It Is the best cough medicine made, says J. Konntx, Corry, Pa. It quickly cures coughs, colds, croup, asthma, grippe ond throat and lung troubles. It Is the childrens favorite remedy. Cures Quickly. J. L. Townshend. Tbe Burlnlgton Route Cb&ngss Time. , On and after Sunday, February 25 the Burlington's Chicago Special leaves Denver 9.00 a. m. arriving Chicago and St. Louis 2.15 p. in. NEXT DAY. The service is as good as (he time is fast sleepers, diner, library and chair cars. One of the sleepers comes through from San Francisco. You can get aboard it in Utah YOUR OWN nOM- Esnd go right through to Chicago witout a single ch&uge of cars. B R. Watson, Genl Agent, R. F. NeBlen, Trav. Pass. & Freight Agent, 214 South West Temple SL, Salt Lake City, Utah. Editor Header, - at BURLINGTON ROUTE. New Time Card, Februry 25, 0.00 n. lit. CbbRirn Siirri,.! Iimiwa VcwtilHilnl Klytr liitvri itotivrr 10.00 p. in. IamiW For Oiunlm.dilniiM. Huhkon Tirkrfb ut offirruof coiiiKviihif liui. - Shilohs Notice of Forfeiture Of ShilubVi 'Consumption Cure Is this to guarantee: "A inWULL tlf IU use Ihe cmiit'hiTvrf-ahi- s, bottle faithfully, then if you 'an say you are not lameNlted return tbe lait-tl- e to your Druggist ami he may reJ'rice 25 cif., fund the price paid. 1 00. 50 cts. aud At Townahcud'a Cough and nsumplion Cure To Jed Chirk, his Heirs and Assign: Yunara hereby uotiliml that a have Hiliulrwl i62UU.ui) Dollar, iu and iiain the Golden Cliff lode, mining rluiiii kituute in the Saitaiiiin Mining County of L'luh, Mute of 1'tuh. iu order to hold uid iireinine under tlie provUiou. of Sertiou 2121, Keiineil tbel'nited Mutes, the amoiiiit r.iiuired to hold thewuuefur the years ending llerenilierKl, Mlaiul Deeeiuber .11. IM; the amount due from Jed Clark for the year IhbMieiiig Ta eive unit Dollar, and for tlieyearl-H- I being Twenty Dullare. Aud if it hiu MJday. after thi. nut Ire by pulilieut ion you fail or refuse to contribute your s,rtiuu of said ekieuditiire a. together aith ci sit., your interest Iu Mid claim will Ihhsiiu the property of the .uliaerilier, uu-- I I der section 4fii. I Mike host man. Oscar Amleraou. M ickmuti, Erk-1. Iseucsou. Find publloaliou Feb. 3 hut April 23. iwo-lhirils- uf et. S.C.WELLS Utut-utee- LEROY, I C LJm For Sale by J. L- - Townshend. Hazel Salve. FOK PASSENOKia OllFl.KItillT eu-J- oy THE us om CHIOAGO, MILWAUKEE ini Flit E'y. Atorneyat-Law- . rayson, Utah. Opsrii, block, GREAT RAILWAY A Or anr point Hast, amt with to many doctor a duylixht ride thronirli tha bills Bince we began using Braudmt scenery of tha Kurlty inoiintaiiis. he sure to id fur e Cough 'Remedy in our ticket that reads via tha home. We keep a botlle open all the time and when ever any of my family or myself ltegin to catch cold we begin to nse the Cough Remedy, and as a result we never No Tiresome Layovers, have to scud away for a din: tor Close Connections in and incur a large doctor bill, for Union Depots. Chamberlaiua Congh Remedy Aud iiitirely the never fails to cure. It is certainQuickest Route medicine of ly a great merit and worth. D. 8, Mearkle, General Merchant aud Farmer, Muttie, To the great rivara ami Atlantis seanoard. Bedford county. Pa. For sale by D. W. Irviue. Modern Elegant and Cliam-berlai- 9 OFFICE. IN. HANK. Beware of all counter- feits J. L. Townsbeud. City, St. Louis, We have Baved Notary Public . . JOS. E.. CE00K,. DeWItt'J Witch Hazel Rxlve Is for piles, Injuries and skin dirteaiuui. It U the original Wlich Kansas fJL R. S. Wimmer, co-ou- o &Cx HAMILTON, CAN.. M-l- CH N.Y.' in Lemmon Blk., Paysun. Office g you ur tricing to SOLE PROPRIETORS AND NOTARY PUIILIC. t. scii-ncr- tst ATTORNEY - AT - LAW. la-ii- drug store. Thic i beyond Auction tha met auccttfiil louKh Medi: cine tvi--r known to tew dual in Y.1I iably Cura tha worst cssra of timoh, Croup and Dicncliitis, while its wonderful auct-ccin the cure of Coneiimmiiin ia without a parallel in tbehiftlory of medicine. Since iu 6r.t diecovery it has been aolil on a etiarantre, a which no other mediefnn can atand. If you have a Cough, we earnestly ask you In United Slateaand totiyit. Canada 2V., Me. and l.ui, slid in ling land Is. StL, 2. Id. and 4a. Id. JOSEPH E. PAGE, Doctor W. A. Wadx Surgeon O.S. L. Railway.Can, liefouutl at all hours at his office. West of Wimmer & Cos. Store Residence on, laysou Utah. corner north of Uuisha plan ing mill. nd ST. PAUL RAILWAY - - and operates 8,154 miles of thoroughly equippal mad In the states of Illinois, Wisconsin, Iowa, Misstiuri, Owns Minntita, South Hakula, North TTtnli kota and the upper Peninsula of gan. FIHST-CI.AH- IlKHDEIiT. - It Michi- is formoht In adopting every Can Nsivc by purchasing your Da- IN KVK11Y M Von COFFINS & CASKETS, of A. PETERSON, pos- PAYSON, UTAH. sible appliance for the safety and comfort of passengers, Including an aliso-lut- e The only I Iearse in the city, Justifiable Curiosity. Hlock System. WoKtlnglimiee Call on or address Train Signals Steam Heat. Kiertric whic will be furnished for funerals, G. R. Glenn, superintendent of If. ft. KUttHKR, at a reasonable price. Commercial Freiift I I'an. 1(1 Light, Vestibuied and Compartment public instruction of the State of etc. Cars, Morlun Salt lake block, City. Georgia, one day explained the Roooll, TUB KIIOItT - H -- LINK os of machine to a tbe powers For further iiifonuaiion address any u.r, mu itHr.yn,' General. i'an., f Tlrkef At Ticket Agent of any railroad or HOMEMADE CUPBOARDS AND' gathering of darkies at the school 8 LonlaMo. commencement. l. l. downing; After the meetFLOUR BINS AT LOWEST FRIGES. Commercial Agent, ing was over a negro called him (alt Lake City, Utah. aside anil wanted to know if lie was in earnest about the machine. Mr. Gleun soured him that be was. Boss, I want ter sx yon Rqtilpniei Thoroughly I nnfr Cant, in birli I and Kwliiiiuir eeats are free to hidden, of regular tra .. OMAHA-CHICAG- X-ra- -- y U ef er nigger et chicken kin yon look in him an' see chicken r Why, yes, Ephraim, said Mr. Gleun. Well, boss, I wants ter ax you oue mo question. Kin you look iu d&t nigger an lell whar uat chicken come from? Argonaut . $1.00. Balance, pay express, $15.75. THESE ARE 1899 MODELS AND GUARANTEED. Acker's rytptjjtii Tablets are Soli On a costive guarantee. Cmes heartburn, raising of the food, distress ia. after eatiug or any form of One little tablet gives im mediate relief. 25 eta. and CO eta. Chicago Machine Co., 69-7- 0 Jackson Bid. Chicago dys-pes- -- J. L. Townshend, Druggist Atatationiwlierenotiraelashowntraina not stop. D trains run daily SI trains ruu daily eaeept Sunday, In Court. DENTIST. A I Sen'l Ilf r 8. H. HAHCIXIK, Truffle Manager, V ioe-Prs- st Continuous Gum, Gold, Alumi mim and Rubber Plates. Gold and Porcelain bridges. Every GEO.W.HEINTZ. Gen' I Pass. Art. operation guaranteed. D- - R- - F- - BlladaJ7' Office' Two doors West of Gutheils OREGON barber Shop. SHORT LINE RY. Hew Train Service Life. traiua will be elegantly equipped' lira Sick Headache Absolut.ly and TLeae local and always mi time. J'ntrotilse ly Moki cared by nsiug permanently them whan you travel, A pleasant herb drink. Tea. LOCAL TIJE CARD, Cures coustipatiou and indigestion, mukea yon eat, sleep work and la effect, fun. 4, IMV.; or Batisfaction Arrive Train and Depart at the Various guaranteed happy. Btalioua as Folio wa : money back. 25 eta. and 50 eta. J. L, Townshend, Druggist Houth Bound I never was glad THAT North Bound for this nent in my speech lut once, said the man from Dearborn, who was in to Bee the big parade. When was that? much I would asked me h aud while take for to tell him was dollars, he offered me a hundred. Womans Journal, im-pe- di -l xty I want to let the people who suffer from rheumatism am sciatica know that Chamberlain's Pain Palm nllieved me after a number of other medicines and a doctor had failed. It ia the l cent liniment I have ever known of. J. A. Dodgen, Alpharetta, Ga. Thousands hare bem cured of iheiiniatism by this remedy. One Hpplirition relieves the pHin. For sale by D. W, Irvine. er Mill Co., can- not be surpassed. This is the general verdict of all who have tried it. The mill is new and It is situated four and: one half miles, north-eas- e. t of Pay-so- n and one; mile: north of state road Ycur patronage solicited. BUFFET-LIBRA- RY CAR w I-I- B1S1K Flour made bjA the Leland Roll- Up-to-Dat- do D C. DODGE, witness, your Lawyer. So, name is Bainsou? Witness Yes, sir. Now remember yon are on yonr oath. Do you seriously think yon could break your uame-sbk- es record?" "I don't know, sir; but I'd like to try when you have finished with the jawbone. Brooklyu ing High Grade Bicycle Sent on receipt of 11 on the Chicago Special is great It's a genuine delight to settle down in one of those big, comfortable chairs, ami. through plate-glas- s windows watch the plains of Nebraska and the fields of. Iowa and Illinois go skimming past yon at I ' dont know how many miles an hour. Talk abont smooth riding! Why, 1 sat at the writing-desin liiat library car, aud wrote a letter just as slick an a whiBtle." Interview uilh a .well kooteii Denver merchant. Two traiiiB a day from Denver to the East the Chicago Special at 9.00 a. in ; the Vestibuied Flyer at 10 00 p. m. Omaha, Chicago, Kansas City, 8L Louis. Through sleepers daily, Ogden to Chicago via Denver mid the Burlington. Tickets at Offices of Connecting Lines. - - - 214 S. W.Temple St. Ticket Office, 1$. U. WATSON, (Teneral Agent, Salt Lakk Cnr. k Four trains dally from Ogden to Salt Lahn. Two fnt train, daily from Salt Lake to all point, neat. Improved TuurlNt Slceiieraaipl FreeKerlln-IngChaCara Salt take to el ange. Elegant Day Coaches, Tha only line operating dinlny ear aervire. Tha Shortest and Fastest Line from Suit Lake to Denver, Knout City. Oinulia and all I'oint. East. W. H. BAJTHOFT. Vice-Prt-- s end Gen. Mgr. . S. W. I'.GGLES Trf. Mgr. I). E. Hurley. Geu'l Pusm-hx- t Apt. Multi hi. Salt Lake City. TirkxtOlliieilil City I Ales Thornton. Agent. 1'uyiuii. lr ( j Ui-n- R. F. NKSLEV, Trav. Pass. & Freight Agt. |