Show on presents brooklyn J bugle say my dear said mr pen kyke as he lie finished reading a letter he lie had just received my brother out west wants me to bu buy y arador strop and a suitable present for a young lady and send them to him I d know that a razor strop was a suitable present for a young youn lady replied mrs who mixing catnip tea and ca caught u lit the remark imperfectly it it would be a suitable present for some dod g asted married women if it would sharpen sharpe ii cm em up any retorted mr who said anything about a razor strop and a young la lady dy what I observed was that my brother out west wants me to send him a razor strop and a present suitable for a young lady now I can get tle tile strop but I dont understand what what kind of a present lie wants let me see mused mrs her hers shopping bopping instincts ris ing to the surface docs does he lie say what kind of a young L lady she is no he lie roared ill mr r he leaves something to the imagination of the reader I suppose ashes got arms and al id legs if die he lie would probably have bave mentioned it what he lie wants is is a present foran for in average woman now dow what can we get f for or her if I knew whether she w was as a blonde or a brunett I could tell better what she slie woi wot id A like replied mrs T iv ano tio like the rest of her sex always ways as a woman with the color that became her best do you suppose he lie means something for her to wear or some ornament for her house you see I dont know whether she keeps house or boards or lives at home what diffie difference rence docs does that make demanded mr ashes probably a human being but we will vill suppose she roosts boosts in a tree does that help you any can you think of something useful for a fern male ale who ilio lives in a tree and hops with lighthearted light hearted skips from bough to bough like a dod aasted crow you might get her a toilet set suggested mrs taking refuge in in a womans comans one idea of an appropriate present for another woman sho she dont want a toilet set snorted mr any moren she wants the you want to think of something that is pretty and at the same time that she can use now think how would one of the new painted porcelain flower pots do v ventured mrs 11 it howled mr dyke a flower pot with a measly saucer under it to plant the tree in in when it turns cold one with brokenleg broken leg legged ed bugs painted on the outside and ang a hole hore in fil the bottom so she can use it the spring for a spy glass glassl the idea A four dollar flower pot for a six c cent ent rose bush with the blind sta staggers ers and a touch odthe of the forta pip P I wheres the pot fetch forth the highly seasoned flower pot and mr leaned back in his chair and glanced at his wife e ill tell you what will do my dear said mrs approaching pro aching the next suggestion cautiously tiou sly y why not send an album you mean one of those books for a lot of idiots to wish they were dead in asked mr suspiciously ano no replied mrs a photograph album dont want it sniffed mr contemptuously you ou mean that sort of a thing that a girl always bring sout after tea and d says ma and pa and aunt vin and her little boy and uncle si and aunt fie and uncle jess and my niece nellie aint she sweet and a dog we used to own and I dont know who that is is and clara morris dont want it and mr voice rose to a steam whistle pitch CIS spose ip pose im im going g to inflict a suffering ain pu public ic w with th a of old stagers that all look alike and have be been en in in every measly album since adam began to wear pants cant ye think of something sensible a halt half dozen forks be nice faltered mrs almost at lier her wits end just the thing gas gasped ped mr half a dozen pitchforks and a ton of hay then kou vou might throw in an eight day hen en coop and a cat climbing over the back fence youve got ideas about such things all you want is a chin whisker and a chimney to be a dod aasted santa claus with your intelligence on these subjects you only need a strike and a glue pot to be a toy shop im goin going to buy this present myself myse lil and air shot out of the house and tore down the street with his head sunk in his shoulders and his fists in his pockets in an hour later ho lie returned all grins and tossed a parcel in his cifes lap 19 now my dear what do you t think bink of that he asked cheerily mrs andyke opened the parcel and disclosed a huge crimson silk handkerchief that would have made a tent for a camp meeting HOW did you come to think of it she asked holding it up aamir angly why replied mr ka he said in tho letter that if I think of anything else to get it a handsome handkerchief here altis it is and mr drew out the letter triumphantly triumphant out but he dont say ban handkerchief lier chief he says s a nice handkerchief elt heres t the be ring oil on the next line said faid mrs mildly planting her thumb on the supplemental word fl why I dent dont he lie write plain why you tell me before what he lie wanted why did jou you let me break my neck to get this flag for when he be wanted a ring if I have more sense than youve got id put broken glass on my head and hire out for the back fence of an idiot asylum mr dove into his chair and snored lustily until bed time anyhow thought mrs eli endyke dyke ag as she sh put the handkerchief away I can find end out where he bought it and trade it forgatch for match safes and lingerie for the baby and by the time lie gets a strop to suit him I will be pretty well fixed out for stockings and hair pins and mrs fired another charge of catnip into the baby h hushing us hi ing I its startled cries as mr S poo fast asleep slid out of his chair like a load of coal |